# Chapter 116
I was so shocked by the term I hadn’t heard in a long time that my heart nearly sank. Confusion swept through my head, and my heart raced rapidly.
Nam Bowon. That was my name. At this name I hadn’t heard in ages—not Yoon Taeho—my entire body began to get damp with cold sweat.
Is this how a fish feels when it’s freely swimming in the ocean and then is suddenly pulled out without warning? Part of it was the discomfort of my upper body being wet from the sweat I’d shed, but I felt as if my soul had been pulled out, making it hard to maintain my sanity.
With my mind already hazy, my eyes were difficult to open, and the sounds around me resonated like buzzes, making it hard to discern my surroundings. Not being able to grasp the current situation made it a bit scary.
After a while, when the blurry afterimages that had made me uncomfortable due to the brightness disappeared and I started getting used to the bright light, the distinctive smell of alcohol typical of hospitals wafted through the air. When my eyes fully opened and I glanced to the side, I saw the face of a surprised woman.
She was someone I’d never seen before, but as I rolled my eyes slightly to check her attire, she seemed to be a nurse. She carefully examined me, and when she saw me staring blankly at her, she quickly composed herself. After that, she said to wait a moment and hastily turned away.
I tried to grab the nurse to ask what on earth was going on, but I couldn’t move even a finger by my own will, so I quickly gave up.
Watching the nurse hurriedly leave the room, I remembered the dream I had just had. To be precise, I recalled the somehow lonely-looking back of Yoon Taeho.
Wait, was that really a dream? Like the sky in the constantly changing background, I was confused whether I had actually seen the boy who was the only constant in each rapidly shifting scene, or if it was just a vain fantasy I had dreamt.
As time passed and my foggy mind gradually cleared, I decided to slowly go back and review what had happened to me, like rewinding a tape.
The dream that had shown me Yoon Taeho became more blurry the more I tried to recall it. I think I had a big argument with someone before cleaning the room… It also seemed to show a younger version of him before that. Though he couldn’t simply be called chubby despite his baby fat, it was definitely Yoon Taeho. He seemed to be gathered with peers of the same age, but I couldn’t remember at all what they were doing.
Since it wouldn’t come back to me no matter how hard I tried, I decided to throw away the dream’s contents and figure out why I was here. That was the most important thing, after all.
Before losing consciousness, I thought in that brief moment that I hadn’t died immediately.
The terrible noise of something breaking, screams echoing from all around. The pain that came over me, making my whole body tingle, was too vivid to dismiss as false. I definitely fell from the skyway bridge at school. So it wasn’t strange that I was now lying on a hospital bed.
However, while I understood that I had woken up in reality, I couldn’t guess who I was now. If I hadn’t just heard my name, I would have thought I had still woken up as Yoon Taeho in that absurd world.
I want to get up right now to check my face, but I can’t, and it’s driving me crazy.
Though I knew it was difficult to move even a finger, I really felt as if all strength had left my body, making it impossible to move at all. My head started to throb, perhaps because my fatigue had peaked, and I couldn’t even continue my thoughts.
Actually, I was still confused about whether I was still dreaming. If it weren’t for the heavy and dizzy feeling as if something had strongly hit my head and passed by, I might have thought I was still in a dream.
I tried to open my mouth to wet my parched lips but only swallowed dry saliva. When I came to my senses, I could see that I had a respirator attached to my mouth.
To calm my wildly pounding heart, I slowly closed my eyes. Having had my eyes closed for a long time and then suddenly being exposed to light made it hard to keep them open.
As I closed my eyes and took deep breaths, my extremely thumping heart gradually calmed down. I felt the tension in my stiffened body disappear as the cold sweat that had soaked me dried up.
Thanks to this, I was in a state where it was easier to grasp the current situation, allowing me to receive less shock no matter what I heard or what happened next.
But what is this anxious sensation? Honestly, I couldn’t tell whether I was feeling anxious or relieved.
After lying there in frustration for what felt like dozens of minutes, the door suddenly opened, and a doctor entered the room.
“Nam Bowon-ssi.”
I opened my eyes at the sound of the door opening, then sighed at the voice calling me. I thought I had misheard, but to think it was true.
“Are you coming to your senses? Do you remember where you are and how you collapsed?”
Unable to speak, I just blinked my eyes. Knowing that I didn’t even have the strength to nod, the doctor didn’t ask further and quietly examined my condition.
Fortunately, there didn’t seem to be any major issues, as the doctor spoke as if to reassure me.
“Since you’ve been lying down for three days, you won’t be able to move right away. You just woke up, so your mind will still be foggy. Let’s monitor your progress for now.”
As I blinked to indicate that I understood, the doctor raised his voice this time.
“As I said before, it’s important to eat regularly. You also need to move a little. This is why your strength is decreasing further, and you’re easily losing consciousness.”
It was exactly like the tone one would use to scold a patient who never listens. What is he talking about? In my memory, I had never received such cautionary advice from this doctor. Above all, he and I were meeting for the first time today.
Not understanding, I just stared blankly at the doctor, who then spoke as if sighing.
“This is already the third time. It’s been two months since you were admitted, and you need to recover and be discharged soon. This time, you must eat your meals. I’ll check on you if I have time.”
The doctor turned away, repeatedly urging me to eat. He seemed like a genuine doctor truly concerned, but my mind was in such a whirl that I couldn’t think properly.
Before leaving the room, the doctor turned his head as if he had just remembered something and informed me that a guardian would be coming.
A guardian? That can’t be. It was such an unfamiliar term to me that my eyes widened in surprise, but the doctor seemed to interpret it differently and simply told me to rest well before closing the door and leaving.
A guardian is coming? Not having any idea who it might be, I just stared blankly at the ceiling. To be honest, I was already dumbfounded by the fact that I had been hospitalized here for two months.
Does this mean that time has passed since I lost consciousness due to the fall accident? But it was Yoon Taeho who got hurt. There was no time to feel relieved about returning to reality; the very situation of being hospitalized in my own body felt wrong.
I wondered if I might have misheard and was still lying there as Yoon Taeho, but then I remembered clearly hearing not only the nurse but also the doctor calling my original name several times.
I strongly felt the urge to see my face.
Seeing that I could move a little as time passed, it seemed I was gradually getting better… Removing the respirator made me feel much more comfortable. I slowly raised my hand to carefully touch my face, but this alone wasn’t enough to determine who I was.
“Haa……”
With an involuntary sigh, I closed my eyes again, deciding to rest for now.
I must have fallen asleep during that time because my head felt heavy. My eyes, which wouldn’t open well, were dry, and as I gently pressed them, a small groan escaped.
“Hey, are you up?”
At the sudden voice of someone, my head jerked up. For a moment, I felt dizzy and held my head, but it was mild enough that I could safely identify the person.
There sat a man with a stoic expression, wearing what looked like an Ivy League haircut, shorter than before as if he had cut his hair, in a small chair placed next to me.
With his sturdy build and rough appearance, he could easily be mistaken for a gangster, but in reality, he was my supervisor at work, a man with a lot of warmth and humor.
He unfolded his arms when our eyes met, his solid biceps making me wonder if the chair he was sitting on was in agony.
“…Manager-nim?”
“Oh? This is unusual. You’re finally addressing me properly this time.”
The manager looked slightly surprised and opened his mouth in a sarcastic tone, but I could sense that it contained a hint of concern.
Perhaps because I was seeing someone I actually knew, my lost sense of reality was gradually returning. Still, just to be sure, I pinched my cheek and felt the pain. I had never pinched my cheek directly in the dream, so I wasn’t sure if this was right, but since it hurt, it was definitely reality.
I laughed dejectedly, trying to clear my dazed mind. I felt relief and an inexplicable bitterness, as if I had finally escaped after wandering through a very long maze.
But why did the manager come as my guardian? Sensing something strange in my questioning expression, the manager raised his eyebrows.
“You look somewhat human today… Are you feeling better now?”
I scratched my cheek at the incomprehensible words, but remembering that even just before, people had been saying things I didn’t understand, I unconsciously asked.
“Did I make some kind of mistake? And why am I hospitalized here… How did you become my guardian, Manager-nim?”
“What? …You don’t remember?”
“……”
At my silence, the manager slightly furrowed his expression and then spoke in a serious voice.
“You were such a diligent guy, but you were absent without notice repeatedly, and we couldn’t even contact you. When I went to find you, you were just lying there like a corpse. You didn’t even recognize me… and then you suddenly collapsed, making me think you might die, so I had you hospitalized. You don’t remember?”
I pressed my lips firmly, having nothing to say. This wasn’t a matter of remembering or not. My complexion gradually turned pale as I felt a chill down my spine.
