# Chapter 65
Peace didn’t last long.
“I already told you I won’t do it!”
Had I ever asserted my opinion this strongly before? Arden was in a state of excitement that even he couldn’t believe.
The only thing Arden, who had nothing left, wanted to protect was none other than Rite. He didn’t want Rite to be swayed by such a fate, nor did he want Rite to grow up as a monster. It tormented Arden that the one trying to tear down all his efforts and commitments was Rite himself.
“Arden.”
Arden could read the words that would follow in Rite’s eyes. Arden, calm down. The roles had been reversed.
Arden himself wanted to do so but didn’t know how. How could he calm down? The worst situation he had feared his entire life was right before him. How exactly?
“You’re asking me to help you kill someone by following that destiny?”
“I told you, I’m not doing this because I believe in destiny.”
“But in the end, you’re following that destiny.”
He needed to know the weight of the name “traitor.” And not just any traitor. A monster that would devour the country. It might not just be killing the Emperor. Perhaps Rite would go down in history as the monster that ruined the country, remembered as a villain of the ages.
Setting aside what might happen after death, Rite might be pointed at for the rest of his life. Rite wasn’t insensitive to such things. He wasn’t someone who could turn a blind eye and pretend not to notice like Arden himself.
Arden clenched his fist tightly.
“Are you certain that who you met was the goddess?”
“I’m certain.”
“How? Even if it was a god, is there any guarantee she’ll keep her promise?”
“If you don’t believe it, then should we just stay like this?”
“You don’t need to gamble with everything you have.”
Arden’s voice rose again. He almost preferred when Rite made unreasonable demands of him.
Good heavens. To think there would come a day when he’d miss those times. A hollow laugh escaped from Arden’s lips.
“Without risking anything, just like this forever?”
“We’ve been living well, haven’t we?”
“What exactly has been ‘living well’?”
“I wasn’t often sick, and I wasn’t injured…”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Arden. I’ve always been sick and suffering.”
Rite sneered. Arden buried his head weakly in his hands as if collapsing. His head felt like it was about to burst.
“What? What exactly has made you suffer so much?”
“I’ve told you so many times. I hate hiding in the cabin like a criminal, being powerless.”
“…”
“Hiding, concealing, being anxious, running away, watching for reactions, not being able to proudly say my name or show my face, not being able to say out loud that it’s Rite who is by Arden’s side. I hate how things are now. It’s just awful.”
Rite spoke without even taking a breath. His words flowed without hesitation, as if they were thoughts he had considered many times.
Arden, who hadn’t said anything, inhaled. I’m wrong again. Before that thought could consume him, Arden hurriedly opened his mouth.
“What you’re trying to do now is committing a real crime. You might end up truly powerless, not just feeling that way. Do you think killing the Emperor is an easy task?”
Rite’s world was narrow. The hero’s adventures found only in fairy tales lacked realism. How could Rite, who had grown up reading books in a small cabin, enter a palace and meet the Emperor?
“Moreover, how do you know if the person you met in the forest was a god or just an illusion?”
“Arden.”
With Rite’s call, darkness descended upon the house. It happened in an instant. All lights went out, and the sound of firewood burning in the stove gradually subsided. Startled, Arden held his breath.
“Do I seem like I’ve received a divine blessing?”
“…”
“I just had a clear purpose from birth. Kill the Emperor.”
Who could do such a thing? Rite’s eyes were clearly saying this.
What had only been suspected was now revealed as fact. Rite had used magic. Arden looked at Rite with confused eyes. He appeared frightened, but also like someone who couldn’t believe what he was seeing.
“I returned alive from the Winter Forest, didn’t I? Isn’t that enough?”
One by one, lights began to turn back on in the once-dark house. A small flame flickered weakly on the stove that had been extinguished, repeatedly dying out. Rite clicked his tongue softly at the sight, but Arden wasn’t interested.
“You could really die.”
That was what Arden feared most. Rite being pointed at was only possible if he survived. What if he failed? The Emperor wouldn’t leave Rite alive. He had already tried to kill him once in the past. It was the Emperor who had wrapped that infant in white cloth and abandoned him in the forest.
Arden remembered the feverish child and had nursed back to health the child who couldn’t even whine despite being in pain. Arden knew well what death was.
“Both you and I. We could both die.”
“I don’t plan to reveal your involvement in this. If you just help me from the side…”
“Do you think that’s what I’m afraid of?”
“…No.”
The mood in the country wasn’t good. At times like this, they wouldn’t leave alone someone who had once pointed a blade at the Emperor. It would make a timely example. A perfect opportunity to show what happens when one has foolish thoughts.
“I told you, Rite. There’s nothing good about standing out too much. There’s a reason people don’t step forward for certain things.”
“Saying it like that doesn’t convince me at all, Arden.”
Rite laughed softly. It sounded like he was laughing at himself.
“What do you mean?”
“I already stand out too much.”
“…”
“I want to become human because I hate this. Will saying it like that convince you?”
Arden closed his mouth. It wasn’t that he had nothing to say. He had thought about something all night. Even while thinking it was absurd, there was no other way.
“Instead…”
Arden carefully opened his mouth. His voice was very small, but Rite’s ears caught it all. It was partly because his senses had become sharper while living in the forest, but it wasn’t just a matter of hearing.
“Let’s move.”
“…”
“We can go somewhere with no one around. Somewhere even more remote than here. Somewhere you won’t stand out. Truly, where no one is.”
Rite’s expression became inscrutable. Arden earnestly met Rite’s eyes.
“The Summer Forest you wanted to go to, let’s find it together.”
This too wasn’t an easy thing for Arden to say. It was an alternative he had come up with by giving up and compromising on many things. But at the same time, it was also something he desperately wanted. He wanted to be included in Rite’s future and to be with Rite in his ideal place.
If they could live away from people’s gazes, just the two of them, without any interference…
“You know that won’t work, Arden.”
Rite shattered that expectation.
“Running away won’t change anything. Only the place will change. I…”
Rite stopped speaking. He sorted through words carefully and uttered a composed sentence.
“I don’t want to hide there either. That’s not what I meant when I said I wanted to find the Summer Forest.”
Arden wanted to ask what Rite meant, but in the end, he couldn’t open his mouth. He wasn’t sure if he could understand even if he heard. Arden himself had raised and taught Rite. Yet they were so different.
* * *
“Three rye breads… no, make it seven white breads.”
“The amount has increased again?”
“…My appetite has returned.”
Lucy didn’t seem particularly interested in Arden’s excuse. She simply quietly filled a paper bag with bread, stacking them neatly.
She appeared darker than usual. However, Arden wasn’t the type to ask what was wrong and listen to her worries, so he stayed quiet, but Lucy spoke first.
“Ea has been talking back a lot lately.”
“…”
“I think it’s puberty. It’s not like this is my first time raising a child. Is it because she’s the youngest, or because she used to be so obedient? My heart just…”
Lucy sighed. Even Ea, who had seemed so mature, apparently had a rebellious phase. Arden, who had been quickly turning things over in his mind, opened his mouth. Lucy had four children. She might know something he didn’t.
“What do you do then?”
“Hm?”
“When your child doesn’t listen to you. What do you do?”
“What else? You just have to let them be. What else can you do?”
The last words were hummed like singing a song. At Lucy’s words, Arden narrowed his eyes.
“Does that work? What if they’re clearly heading down a wrong path when there’s an easier and right one?”
“Children don’t grow up the way I want them to. If they did grow exactly as I wanted, that would be a doll, not a child.”
What if they’re going down a truly, truly absurd path? Arden wanted to ask that. In normal cases, Lucy would be right, but it was different when one was heading down a path that endangered their life.
While Arden was lost in thought without answering, Lucy sighed and added:
“Oh my, people live their own lives. Is there anyone who’s lived without hardship? I went through so many hardships growing up too. As you grow, sometimes you think, ‘Mom was right,’ and other times, ‘Mom was wrong.’ That’s how Ea will grow up too.”
No extraordinary solution emerged as Arden had hoped. Was it inevitably different from normal child-rearing experiences? Arden concealed his disappointment and left the store.
* * *
Arden stopped in front of the front door. He hesitated to open it. It was because he knew what it felt like to enter an empty house.
This was his first outing since Rite had returned. Even knowing Rite would be inside, he was somehow afraid that Rite might not be there.
After hesitating for a while, Arden opened the door. Warm air welcomed him. Making his hesitation seem pointless, Arden hurriedly entered and looked for Rite. Rite wasn’t in the kitchen. He placed the purchased items on the table and checked the living room, but Rite wasn’t there either.
Arden had experienced this kind of thing twice. His mind, conditioned by learning, turned on the emergency lights. He quickly approached the door to Rite’s room. Even for that short distance, he was out of breath as if he had run for a long time. Without any hesitation, he immediately opened the door.
