# Chapter 34
“Why is it impossible? Is there a law saying an Emperor can’t be disabled?”
“You haven’t even seen him directly.”
“But there are people who have.”
Emperor. That word made me snap to attention. I instinctively pressed the metal wrapped around my earlobe and listened carefully to the conversation.
“He’s such an exalted person, maybe he just didn’t want to walk himself.”
“With his ankle so swollen, he probably couldn’t walk.”
“You really believe that?”
“I’m telling you, it’s what my cousin’s close friend said! The back of his ankle was bright red and swollen.”
The country had been in turmoil for quite some time, and all kinds of rumors had been circulating. Disrespectful rumors about the Emperor had also been spreading secretly. If they had reached even Winterishe, where information was slow to arrive, I could roughly imagine the situation in the capital.
But this was the first time I’d heard rumors about the Emperor’s ankle. And to call him disabled? Did that mean he couldn’t walk? Though I’d only seen his back from a distance, I couldn’t believe there was anything wrong with him. A strong, dignified body. A gambler who had personally participated in numerous wars and led them to victory. During my time at the palace, I had never heard even a baseless rumor that such an Emperor was disabled.
“But it is strange. It’s been years since he welcomed the Empress, but there’s still no news of a child… You know, back then, there was that rumor…”
“Shh! Why are you talking about that…!”
I unconsciously held my breath. The Emperor and Empress’s child. The reason I was having an unplanned dinner. The child with purple eyes.
“It must be a curse. With all those wars he waged, how could he create a child with a body stained by blood?”
“Why do you keep saying such things? Are you praying for the country’s downfall?”
“Whether the country falls or not, it’s equally hard to make a living.”
The Artalis Empire. A powerful nation with a deep history, shining brilliantly. Such descriptions were gradually fading. Nevertheless, Artalis was still a powerful country that couldn’t be easily dismissed, though it was certainly diminished compared to its former glory.
“I’m a bit boring, aren’t I?”
Jack’s voice startled me, and I looked up. Without realizing it, I had been leaning my body forward, focusing on the conversation at the next table. I quickly straightened myself and looked at Jack, who smiled awkwardly.
“No, not at all. I’m just not very good with rumors… I was curious because it was the first time I’d heard such things.”
“Well, you do live alone in the Winter Forest.”
The discomfort disappeared from Jack’s expression.
“What major events could happen anyway? We’ve always managed to get through.”
“I hope so. I hope nothing happens.”
I sincerely hoped nothing would happen. I wished not only that Rite’s fate and the country’s fate wouldn’t become deeply intertwined, but also that the surrounding circumstances wouldn’t be shaken until my death. If I could only live quietly, as if dead, as if someone like me didn’t even exist, I would have no other wishes.
Of course, with Rite too.
“But sometimes I do worry.”
“…”
“A while back, almost 10 years ago… The Knights came all the way here and stirred things up. Ah, perhaps Arden doesn’t know?”
To be precise, it was 8 years ago, the year I took in Rite. Back then, when the Knights came to find the dead baby’s body. I deliberately hid my emotional response and nodded.
“Did that happen?”
“It was chaos. Rumors that a monster had been born at the palace and so on.”
Jack shook his head as if telling a ridiculous story.
“Looking back now, it sounds absurd, but it was serious at the time. When everyone was saying it, you start to wonder, ‘Is it true?'”
“…”
“They said the Empress gave birth to a monster. Ridiculous, right?”
Jack looked at me and laughed as if seeking agreement. I forced the corners of my mouth up to laugh along.
“There was a commotion because they said the monster had been abandoned in the Winter Forest, and people were wondering if they should move away. Is Arden okay with that?”
“With what?”
My voice came out sharply at the sudden question. I hastily softened my expression and looked at him. Jack didn’t seem to mind much.
“Living in a forest where such monsters lurk. It seems scary.”
“Ah…”
“Wouldn’t it be better to live down in the village?”
The verdict of the trial wasn’t exile to the Winter Forest. It was exile to the north. Entering the Winter Forest was my own choice. I preferred the forest inhabited by monsters to being under people’s gazes. That was still the case now, and even if it weren’t for that reason, I couldn’t blend into the village. After all, I had taken in the child they called a monster.
“I’m used to it now. It’s not the deep forest where monsters live.”
“That’s good to hear.”
Jack replied with a smile.
“I would have been lonely. Alone in the Winter Forest.”
“Arden is amazing, truly,” Jack said with a bright, uncreased expression. It was an obvious empty compliment, so I didn’t react much. The word “amazing” couldn’t sound good to an exiled traitor.
Just as silence continued at the table, the food I ordered finally arrived.
The meal was ordinary. I’ve never been picky about taste, so I could eat pretty much anything. However, throughout the meal, I couldn’t focus on Jack’s conversation.
I wondered if Rite was taking good care of himself eating alone. That thought filled my mind so completely that I couldn’t properly recognize what the current conversation was about. I just gave halfhearted replies like “yes” and “is that so.” Despite this, Jack never complained even once.
He was certainly more mature than Rite.
* * *
The dinner that started 10 minutes early ended an hour later than I expected. I had naturally assumed it would end 10 minutes early as well, but that was needless worry.
I headed home, holding the packaged food against my chest, afraid it might get cold. Rite had never eaten alone until now. Even if I was late, he always waited for me before eating together. This was just a concern that he might have skipped a meal.
“I’m back.”
Pretending to be casual, I opened the door and quickly glanced at the dining table. It was clean, with no particular traces. As I placed the packaged food on the table, Rite opened his door and appeared. He didn’t look happy, but he didn’t seem as fierce as he had in the morning.
“Dinner? I brought this in case you hadn’t eaten…”
“If you were only going out for dinner, why did you leave in the morning?”
His voice, deeper than usual, scolded me. What are you talking about? How do you know that? I opened my mouth to ask but realized before making a sound. He had gone down there again.
Although I opposed Rite going down to the village, it wasn’t my unilateral order. It took a long time for Rite, who had been staying inside the house as if it were his fortress, to go outside and wander around the nearby forest.
Despite being so reluctant to go outside, he had passed through the forest and gone down to the village. Who I meet shouldn’t matter to him at all.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“That appointment, it was a dinner appointment, wasn’t it? Before that, Arden was alone. So why did you leave so early? Is it because you don’t like being with me?”
“How do you know that?”
I pretended not to know. Rite couldn’t answer immediately and bit his lip. I acted nonchalant and took off my coat, hanging it on the rack near the entrance. As I was unwrapping my scarf, I heard Rite’s voice from behind me.
“Why aren’t you answering?”
“You should answer first.”
“I asked if you don’t like being with me!”
Suddenly, as if a wind was blowing, the front door rattled loudly. I flinched in surprise at Rite’s loud voice. When I turned around, I saw purple eyes filled with resentment.
“When did I ever say that?”
“Then tell me it’s not true.”
“You’re too old to be throwing tantrums like this.”
“You don’t like me because I’ve grown up? Then what about Jack?”
“Haah… Rite.”
I sighed and ran my palm over my face. I was tired. My head was a mess.
“You weren’t interested in Jack. Why are you suddenly meeting him?”
“Rite, this isn’t something I need your permission for.”
“You’re still not interested in him.”
“How would you know that?”
“That day, when I masturbated calling Arden’s name—”
“Don’t talk about it.”
I stepped forward to Rite and warned him. I didn’t intend to make a scary face, but my expression involuntarily hardened.
That incident was an accident. If a machine malfunctioned, one would need to analyze the malfunction in detail and revisit the blueprint, but I didn’t have the courage to look at ‘that’ again and analyze it. So it needed to be completely erased and started over from the beginning.
“Why?”
One corner of Rite’s mouth smoothly turned up. His face was relaxed like a winner’s. I had made a mistake. I shouldn’t have revealed even a hint of my weakness to Rite.
“Is it strange? It wasn’t the first time.”
“I told you not to do it.”
“You know what, Arden?”
I should be making a stern face and scolding him sharply. But even to my own ears, my voice had no authority whatsoever. In this situation, Rite should be the one feeling fear, but I was the one trembling with fear.
“I did that every time I crawled into your bed. You asked if I had a nightmare.”
“…”
“I never had nightmares. Even when I crawled into bed with a much smaller body than now, I never had a nightmare.”
Rite slowly closed the distance and approached me. As the distance narrowed, my gaze gradually tilted upward.
When did it start? At some point, I had to look up at Rite like this.
“When I said I had a scary dream, you pitied me. Poor Rite. Pitiful Rite. So I lied.”
“That’s not true. I didn’t pity you…”
“Lately, I often have erotic dreams.”
“Do you know who appears in those dreams?” Rite whispered as he reached out his hand.
