# Chapter 27
Straight, soft fingers slipped between his own. They were entirely different from Dohyuk’s hands. A cream cheese-like softness that knew nothing of slaughter squished beneath his fingertips. Though his palm was drenched in sweat, Junseo didn’t seem to mind, rubbing his hand against Dohyuk’s. Dohyuk unconsciously trembled at the waist.
“Don’t pull away, and please don’t hurt me.”
He utters such tender words, not knowing what tangled thoughts were just running through Dohyuk’s mind. Shaking his head, Dohyuk tried to remove him, but how could an Esper dare to refuse a Guide? The most tremendous rebellion Dohyuk could manage was to release as much tension as possible from his hand held by Junseo.
Guiding from a high-compatibility Guide is like heaven?
“…Hngh! Hah! Wait, just a—!”
Nonsense.
Hell unfolded once again.
It was blissful to a degree he never wanted to know existed.
With each blink, the world before him was entirely within a kaleidoscope. He couldn’t focus his gaze on any one spot amid the colorful feast of colors unfolding before his eyes. While other people’s guiding was like a stabilizer that loosened the fatigue that stuck like soot and helped dispel depression, Junseo’s guiding was ferocious. It shared its essence with the forbidden fruit. It revealed that the world he had been standing on wasn’t beautiful at all, wasn’t a place he could be satisfied with. It showed him heaven like a mirage, whispering that he could reach it if he just stretched out his hand a little.
Spring sunshine. Wildflowers in modest bloom. Animal tail fur brushing against fingertips. The warmth of a beloved one caressing skin. A mother’s hand stroking his head and a father’s laughter tickling between his shoulder blades.
A lakeside gleaming more brilliantly than shattered diamonds, bathed fully in sunlight. White mist settled over the forest.
The sound of a babbling stream.
Various treasures that the world had hidden were laid out before his eyes, sparkling. The sole heaven holding his hand revealed a smile. He might have opened his mouth slightly.
Saying that if he just held onto him, he would lay all these things at his feet.
Before he knew it, the sun had set, and time became distorted in the darkened room.
He was confused about when the guiding had even ended. Dohyuk gasped like a broken doll.
“You enjoy it this much, so why do you keep pushing me away?”
When Junseo, who had slowly lowered his gaze to his lapels, whispered in a low voice close to his nape, Dohyuk just wanted to cry. As if belatedly comforting him, something soft touched his forehead. He raised his dazed gaze. Junseo was already smiling like an excited child.
***
“Be my partner.”
“…Did you even listen to what I said?”
To Dohyuk’s self-deprecating question, Junseo responded in a voice as refreshing as the scent from his nape. The guiding room, where the lights had been turned on at some point, was as bright as day despite the evening having long passed.
“That you get aroused by my guiding?”
Dohyuk buried his flushed face in both palms and let out what must have been his umpteenth sigh of the day. After being swept away by the guiding and finally spilling his confession, he had no pretense to look Junseo in the eye.
“Why are you so embarrassed? It’s written in theory books that high-compatibility guiding both gives Espers stability and excites them.”
“But I made a mistake with you at the beginning too. Don’t you remember?”
“Ah.”
At Dohyuk’s words, Junseo rolled his eyes as if just remembering something he had forgotten. It might have seemed strange that Junseo, despite being the victim, spoke like a third party, but unfortunately, Dohyuk didn’t have time to think deeply. He was startled because Junseo, with his eye corners reddened from crying for a long time, suddenly thrust his face close.
Like an adult rushing to a child who had fallen to the ground, Dohyuk unconsciously placed his hands on both of Junseo’s cheeks and gently rubbed around his eyes. Junseo allowed his pronunciation to slip freely with the movement and spoke in a murmur.
“At that time, you weren’t in good condition, and the drug effects were strong. You apologized too.”
Junseo’s languid voice faded. As if Dohyuk’s touch was hot, he slightly frowned his left eye while obediently entrusting his face to him.
“A wrong doesn’t become undone just because you apologize for it.”
“As I said then, I’m fine. I just want to be partners with you, hyung. I asked the director, and he said you don’t have any Guides at headquarters with a matching rate over 33%?”
“Junseo, I’m not an S-class Esper. You don’t need to be so obsessed with matching rates. You’re S-class, so you can guide all Espers…”
It was that tone from before. That manner of speaking where he made an expression full of apology to Junseo while retorting that being A-class was enough for him. Junseo was so bored because what Dohyuk was about to say next was so obvious that he could yawn, so he quickly opened his mouth.
“I have a confession to make.”
“Hm?”
Junseo lowered his head halfway and dropped his eye corners fully, making a half-crying face. Based on his observations of Dohyuk so far, this expression had a fairly high win rate.
As expected, Dohyuk was already restless. Could it be an aftereffect of today’s much-anticipated guiding? Junseo couldn’t take his eyes off Dohyuk because he was so cute. It felt like his view, which had been dully submerged in grayscale, was filling with various colors. How carelessly cute he was, thinking he could easily subdue Junseo if he wanted to, yet being careful as if handling down feathers for that very reason.
Junseo recalled Dohyuk’s face swept away by guiding just moments ago. True to an Esper said to have weak mental strength despite strong physical abilities, Dohyuk’s mind was incredibly soft. During guiding, if teased and coaxed just a little, he would soon have a fierce look in his eyes, unable to bear his desires. Yet it was so like Dohyuk to never surrender to his nature, always trying to suppress it.
“The truth is, I’m a bit different from ordinary Guides.”
Junseo confirmed once more today.
There couldn’t be another Esper this strong and this lovable.
This was his. It was a fact as natural as a chick breaking out of its eggshell without being taught. Just imagining another Guide holding that man in their hands and digging deep into him made his blood run cold.
“What do you mean? How are you different?”
When Dohyuk frowned, his expression became even colder, meshing with his thick eyebrows. Even facing a countenance that could bring a chill in summer, Junseo just kept his eyes wide open.
“It’s just as I said. You’ve heard rumors about my guiding, right? But I never did it on purpose.”
“Yes, that was because you were inexperienced…”
“I thought so too, but after meeting you, I realized. That you might be the only Esper compatible with me.”
Seeing those sparkling eyes, Dohyuk slid his gaze away with the bad premonition that he might be completely won over again.
“That’s a misunderstanding. There’s no such thing as ‘only.'”
“No. Every time I performed guiding until now, my body always hurt. There weren’t even any Espers with a matching rate of over 15% with me. But you’re different, right? Is this also my misunderstanding?”
Being disgusting was, broadly speaking, a form of physical pain. Junseo exaggerated as if to show off. It wasn’t a complete lie since there were truly times when he would fall sick when the energy was too conflicting. As expected, Dohyuk, who was probably preparing to say something like ‘if you try guiding with various other Espers,’ frowned. His face was cold but full of concern.
“Your body hurts? How? You never mentioned that. Does the headquarters know?”
“Why do you think I’ve never been to a dungeon? I was neglected because I was useless for these reasons.”
Junseo lightly licked his dry lips with his tongue. Although he mixed in a bit of malingering and lies to gain Dohyuk’s sympathy, it was true that Espers with high compatibility with him were extremely rare. If his matching rate with domestic Espers was this notably low, they might have tried matching with foreign Espers, but headquarters didn’t allow it. The reason was obvious. Guides typically moved with Espers. They probably wanted to prevent the risk of losing high-quality personnel.
Also, it was true that he had never been to a dungeon. If they were of the same S-class, guiding efficiency decreased due to low matching rates, and if they were Espers of lower rank than Junseo, they were affected to the extent that their condition could become dangerously unstable, so he was only excluded from dungeon missions, which were particularly dangerous compared to other missions.
Of course, since it was true that he had never been to a dungeon due to his characteristics, Junseo maintained an indifferent expression, considering it not a lie. After examining Dohyuk’s expression, he drove in the final nail.
“I’m scared because it hurts so much every time I guide other Espers.”
Dohyuk flinched at his voice, which was full of weakness.
“I didn’t know you’ve never been to a dungeon.”
With a seriously furrowed expression, Junseo, worried about what thoughts might be going through Dohyuk’s mind next, lowered his eye corners even more.
“You don’t have a partner either, so why do you keep pushing me away? It hurts my feelings.”
“…I thought if you practiced guiding with me, you’d eventually be able to easily guide other Espers too. I was worried it might become troublesome later if that happened.”
Dohyuk’s gaze wavered. Though he tried not to look at Junseo’s face, he kept glancing at him out of habit. Holding back the laughter that threatened to burst out, Junseo swayed gently like a dog-tail grass tempting a cat.
