It was probably the day Mom died. The day he came back and sat alone at home, leaving behind Grandmother submerged in grief over losing her daughter. Eunchan couldn’t bear to stay there long. It was also in front of his new mom’s family, and he was still too scared to accept his mother’s death.
The sound of the moving clock’s second hand seemed to echo like thunder, so Eunchan couldn’t stay inside the house at all. Wearing worn sneakers and putting on a tattered coat, he wandered aimlessly around the village entrance.
Listening to the sound of a dog barking incessantly without rest, Eunchan kept walking. Grandmother would stay up all night and come back. He was hungry from skipping lunch, but he couldn’t muster the courage to go back home. He didn’t want to sit still in the living room, rooted like weeds in an empty garden.
Let’s just walk a bit below the mountain. No, let’s just go around the hiking trail a bit. No…… Just…… Eunchan walked without purpose. He might have wanted to tire his body out. Not wanting to think about anything, he just focused on his own rough breathing that spilled out.
When he came to his senses at the sound of a crow crying long, the sun was already setting in the western mountains. The mountain at night when darkness descended was a space that even adults feared because nothing could be seen. Eunchan hurriedly started going down the opposite way from the path he’d climbed up.
In the already fading world, it was difficult to find direction, so he kept going around and around the same path. When the sun hung on the mountainside, Eunchan finally discovered a small trail.
He pushed away the thick tree branches with his hands and forcibly stepped on grass that came up above his ankles, advancing onto the path. Believing it would be a path leading down the mountain, Eunchan walked as if running. Now the whole world was dyed red.
He took big breaths filled with the swollen air in his lungs and wiped away the sweat beads formed on his forehead. The cold winter wind wrapped around Eunchan’s nape, but he didn’t even know if it was cold because of his fever. At the lights visible in the distance, Eunchan approached that direction as if possessed.
A white house, a wide garden…… and a boy standing below it.
Hyung.
* * *
“Huk, heok……”
Eunchan opened his closed eyes and swept his face. The dark interior at least calmed Eunchan’s startled heart. He fumbled at his bedside to find his phone and turned it on—the time was late dawn.
[I will contact you.]
[Hyung ㅅㅂ the president didn’t pocket it, right???]
After reading the texts from Inju and Hyungsik, Eunchan put his phone down again. He was making plans to go down to Muan with Inju. Someday I should go back again, I should go down, he’d only talked about it but now that he was really going, his feelings were complicated. In the end, he even had a dream he didn’t usually have, so his mouth was bitter.
Rich family’s son. His parents were some great entrepreneurs, he’d said. He probably went abroad to study, worked, and perhaps by now had gotten married and had children.
“Am I the same?”
Stupid Kim Eunchan. Pathetic Kim Eunchan. It was just kids’ play, but it was funny how he was still caught up in it. When hyung probably doesn’t even remember.
Eunchan sat up from the bed. It seemed like he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep again. He thought about turning on the TV but remembered he’d cut the cable broadcast to save money. Eunchan rubbed his stiff eyes, then stood up and headed to the bathroom. He needed to wash his face at least to come to his senses.
Should he pack his bags in advance since he was up anyway? It wasn’t work that would end in a day or two. He might have to sleep in Muan and come back, or he might have to keep wandering around to find that person called Noeul. Detective work that’s not in his fate. If only he had some brains for studying, he could have at least become a police officer.
Eunchan leaned against the sink and looked at the mirror. Unable to go to the hair salon recently because he was busy, his slightly long black hair covered above his eyebrows. He’d never dyed his hair even once in his life. Money spent on hair was a waste, and there was no one to look good for. That didn’t mean his hair quality was good either. Perhaps because he’d lived with night and day switched, it was always dry. Thin eyebrows, eyes without double eyelids. Lately he’d skipped meals often, so his face had lost a lot of weight and his cheekbones protruded.
Eunchan cupped his hands to hold water, then splashed it on the bathroom mirror. The opaque form melted down along the water.
* * *
After packing and showering with restless feelings all weekend, it was already Monday. 8 AM, Eunchan came out of the villa. He planned to hurry to the office and enjoy the air conditioning before the sunlight-pouring morning came. He stuck earphones in his ears and randomly played the Top 100 chart.
Hometown, hyung, commission, land…… There was much to worry about, but no particular method. Eunchan planned to just do it, just like he had done until now, as he had always done. He definitely planned to do that.
“What’s going on with the old man, did Hyungsik say something?”
He properly fastened his backpack that he’d been roughly wearing on his shoulder to clear the boxes that would be blocking the entrance today, but there was no need—the entrance was clean with nothing there. It was an old man who wouldn’t even listen with one ear even when Eunchan always told him several times, so he was worried whether Hyungsik had beaten him up or something. Jumping up the stairs two at a time, Eunchan took out the key from his pocket. It seems like I was first to work yesterday too. Anyway, it was a salary that came in according to cases, so it didn’t matter.
“……Did someone come first?”
What day is it today really? No boxes, and the company door is open. Eunchan put the key back in and turned the handle to open the steel door.
“Ah, I’m sorry.”
And when his eyes met with the person standing inside, Eunchan hurriedly apologized and then closed the door. Something felt strange, so it seemed like he’d entered the wrong building. Eunchan turned his still-wet hair and rolled his eyes.
<Nationwide Network Service, Umbrella Planning>
“Is it our company though?”
However, the company nameplate hanging on the side was definitely the one Eunchan knew. What? Who’s that? He knew he had to open the door and go in again, but he hesitated. No, fuck, isn’t that a celebrity? Though he only saw them briefly, they were a pretty person. Black hair and snow-white face. If not for the tall height and broad shoulders, he wouldn’t have even known if they were male. And he thought he saw a halo too.
The cold handle had already been warmed thanks to his hand temperature. Eunchan checked the time on his phone again. 8:15. It was early. No matter how much they were a client, no one came at this hour.
Once, twice, three times. After taking a deep breath, Eunchan slowly turned the handle. The creaking sound eerily echoed through the corridor like a horror movie.
Eunchan carefully put his left foot inside. That pretty person was still standing and looking at the entrance, so their eyes had to meet again.
“……Who are you?”
It wasn’t what he should have said, but because he was so flustered, random words were popping out. However, the man answered with a bright smile even at Eunchan’s words.
“I’m, I’m glad to see you.”
As if he’d been waiting for Eunchan all along.
“Ah, yes. Hello.”
An awkward greeting was exchanged. Eunchan slowly moved his steps inside. Since he should first recommend the guest standing tall beside the desk partition to sit anywhere, Eunchan passed by the man and headed to his seat. Seeing him up close, the man was very pretty, pale, and somehow seemed to smell good too.
Eunchan held back his gaze that kept trying to go to his face and stared at the concrete floor pattern.
“Please sit down first.”
After roughly clearing the desk full of snack wrappers, he pulled out a chair and offered it to the man. Would it have been better to take him into the president’s office?
“Or, inside……”
Still, he’s a guest. Besides, the atmosphere felt similar to Han Inju from last time, which was strange. Eunchan grabbed the chair again to take the man to the president’s office, but the man spoke quickly as if to stop this. He poured it out while even holding his breath.
“He-here is good.”
“……Then wait just a moment. Should I get you some tea?”
“Yes, yes.”
It was a small office, so it was embarrassing to do anything. After seating the man in his chair, Eunchan walked to the sink and started rummaging under the cupboard. Finding the iced tea powder he’d bought last time, Eunchan poured it into a small paper cup. The flying small powder particles entered inside his nose.
Eunchan secretly stole a glance at the man’s appearance reflected in the window. The guest who came early in the morning was wearing a long-sleeved shirt despite the hot summer. His neat forehead, high and straight nose, and long eye shape looked at a glance like a languid snake, or conversely like a gentle reindeer.
And perhaps because of his pale skin or because of his high and long-slit features, the man didn’t look stuffy or hot at all even in the sweltering summer. Rather, even though he wore short sleeves, he himself covered in sweat looked more stuffy. Having finished observing, Eunchan turned his head away from the two people overlapping in the glass window.
“Please drink.”
It was iced tea with just a few ice cubes floating from what remained in the freezer. The man politely received the paper cup Eunchan held out with both hands. Meanwhile, the appropriate noise from the air conditioner that had just been turned on filled the space.
“Um……”
While Eunchan was lost, not knowing what to say first, the man observed the surroundings with sparkling eyes. Especially as he thoroughly looked at Eunchan’s desk, Eunchan hurriedly reached out and organized the papers and photos placed on the desk. [Successive Opposition Following Development Restriction Zone Release……], [Whose Benefit Is It After All?] The sensational newspaper headlines he’d roughly clipped crumpled in Eunchan’s grasp.
“When did you arrive?”
Who opened the door? It was probably Hyungsik.
“Ah, I came in the morning…… Is, is it very hot?”
The man who finally took his eyes off the desk at Eunchan’s question threw a question along with his answer. Accordingly, thick sweat beads flowed down from Eunchan’s forehead along his cheeks. The man extended his arm and brought it close to Eunchan’s cheek, but Eunchan quickly pulled his head back to avoid the man’s touch.
What, why is this person acting so casually?
