“Doing this on purpose…”
Flustered, I blinked.
‘How did he know?’
Was Kwon Seonho this perceptive? At least not in my memory.
“No. This situation is absurd enough as it is, but your words don’t add up, right? You didn’t know your own name, then you seem to know you’re an idol, and yet you say you don’t know anything about your ‘For Starium’ days.”
“…”
“It’s also strange that you were flustered hearing what day it is when you don’t even know how you collapsed. When did you think it was supposed to be?”
That couldn’t be helped. I was skilled at acting, not at fabricating lies themselves. I succeeded in pretending to have memory problems, but I inevitably lacked persuasiveness in concrete, realistic details. It was something I’d done impulsively the moment I realized I’d returned two years into the past.
Very coincidentally, the medical staff who saw me wavering took my problem a bit more credibly and seriously.
“Hey. This isn’t a hidden camera thing or something, is it? This isn’t funny, Ijae. You know better than anyone that hyung hates pranks like this.”
“…Ugh.”
The shoulder he gripped throbbed with pain. It was because Kwon Seonho grabbed it tightly without controlling his strength, as if venting his anger.
Come to think of it, he was always like that. Kwon Seonho was ignorant about the sensations I felt, the emotions I had when receiving his words or actions, and about me in general. No, he was indifferent.
So there was no way he had suddenly come to know me well.
‘This is just…’
It’s not something he said from noticing anything—it’s kind of like a preamble. A preamble to immediately deny a troublesome situation because things weren’t going his way.
To add one more thing, it was nothing more than your venting with the meaning of ‘how dare you pretend not to know me?’
Fortunately, the doctor intervened before I could say anything.
“You can’t do this. Please let go first.”
“…”
“As I mentioned earlier, the patient’s condition is unstable and it hasn’t been long since he regained consciousness, so you must not agitate him like this.”
The doctor who let out a deep sigh issued an eviction order to those surrounding the bed.
“Please all step out for the sake of his stability. Originally, visits are only possible in the designated visiting room.”
“Everyone has to leave?”
“In principle, only one primary guardian can be registered and remain. Usually a family member does this, but have you by any chance informed his family of his hospitalization?”
The manager shook his head.
“His phone is locked with a password, and Ijae doesn’t really like contacting home.”
It was true. I didn’t want to add this kind of worry to my mother, who was busy day and night with restaurant work.
Still, when told that one guardian was needed for consultation and test result guidance, an unexpected person raised his hand and stepped forward.
“I’ll do it.”
“Seungwoo, you?”
I quickly bit down on my lips to avoid showing my bewilderment.
Min Seungwoo. The 1st place participant in the idol survival audition program ‘For Starium’ and this group’s center and leader. Unlike me who barely made it in, he was outstanding in all areas and also the person who felt most distant even though we were in the same group.
Naturally, we had almost no personal connection, so we’d hardly ever had a proper conversation unless the cameras were rolling.
“I think it’s best if I stay.”
So this situation felt too strange to me. Min Seungwoo as my guardian.
“Hey, what are you talking about?”
Kwon Seonho interjected in a sarcastic tone.
“Since when were you and Han Ijae close enough for you to be his guardian? If anyone stays, I should stay. I’m the closest to him.”
“You can’t. Didn’t you just grab Ijae and intimidate him?”
Min Seungwoo replied coldly.
“We’re choosing a guardian, not a best friend. The manager has to pick up the other kids, so it’s right for me as the leader to do it.”
“Ha, leader my ass.”
Just as Kwon Seonho, who usually didn’t like Min Seungwoo much, was growling and about to pick a fight, the nurse who had stepped out briefly came in and said,
“Um, there’s a visitor outside. They came to visit.”
“A visitor? Our members should have all already come and gone, so who…”
“Who is it?”
Not only the members’ heads but mine turned sharply as well. Who would come looking for me when I hardly knew anyone?
Of course, even if we asked who it was, the nurse wouldn’t know. That’s what I was thinking.
“It’s actor Seo Nakil.”
For a moment, a subtle silence settled over the hospital room. Even Min Seungwoo, who wasn’t one to show emotions easily, asked with a surprised face.
“…Actor Seo Nakil?”
“Ijae hyung. Were you close with the actor?”
I barely held back saying ‘no’ and spoke.
“Who is that person?”
The answer came from the doorway.
“You don’t know me? Han Ijae-ssi.”
The moment my eyes met the man standing in the doorway, time seemed to stop briefly. It might be a very cliché expression, but there was no other way to explain it.
Nakil (落日). Like that name, he was a man like the setting sun. The eyes directed this way were black as if painted hundreds, thousands of times over with bone-dry crimson. His deep, calm eyes were dry yet cool, and his prominent nose and tightly closed lips created a clear yet neat impression. Just standing straight, I could feel an indescribable sense of intimidation and elegance.
I couldn’t simply describe him as handsome. His presence was impressive. It was as if just being here drew the gazes of everyone in the same space.
Probably everyone who knew Seo Nakil had been captivated by him in that way. That’s why Seo Nakil was famous. He was a widely known figure to the extent that even the nurse could recognize him instantly.
A person from another world whom I rarely even saw from afar. An existence who was people’s true idol, unlike me who was often subjected to contempt and ridicule.
I, who had been gazing at him endlessly as if entranced, belatedly came to my senses.
“Um, I’m really sorry to say this to someone who just arrived, but… if you’re not a guardian, you’ll have to wait outside for now.”
“…Guardian.”
I thought he’d back down at those words, but Seo Nakil said something unexpected.
“If everyone leaves, who will remain by Han Ijae-ssi’s side?”
It was a strange thing to say. There were already five or six people in this hospital room, yet Seo Nakil spoke as if none of them were my guardian.
Or as if he wanted to say that none of these people could be my guardian.
Seo Nakil’s gaze swept over me once. It was a somehow urgent look. It even seemed somehow desperate, so I almost suspected whether I had really lost my memory.
As he was about to say something more, opening his mouth slightly, Kwon Seonho intervened, blocking in front of me.
“Do you know our Ijae?”
Seo Nakil’s brow narrowed slightly. It was such a minute difference that you’d only notice if you looked carefully, but it seemed like he found Kwon Seonho’s words disagreeable.
“I came to pick him up.”
“What?”
“…What?”
Both Kwon Seonho and I answered at the same time.
“Because we promised that. And it looks like a situation where a guardian is needed.”
Every word coming out of the man’s mouth was nothing but strange. At first he said none of these people could be a guardian, and now he’s saying he’s my guardian.
Seo Nakil and I were not on terms to pick each other up. We were even less on terms for him to become my guardian. We’d never made any such promise.
As clearly as the worlds we lived in were starkly different, the fact that we had no relationship built between us was also distinct.
“Um, I’m sorry but…”
I swallowed down the words ‘we’re not on those terms’ and opened my mouth.
“As you heard earlier, I don’t know you.”
Even though it was a fact beyond an excuse, the moment I was caught by Seo Nakil’s gaze, I felt a subtle sense of guilt. Lowering my eyes, I added as if making an excuse.
“They say I fainted for two days and woke up, but I have no memory.”
“No memory.”
“Yes. None at all.”
Would he be flustered? Or would he feel hurt? Or would he feel relieved thinking his absurd lie wasn’t discovered? Or would he worry, asking how that happened?
And he easily surpassed all my expectations.
“Is that so.”
Seo Nakil, while looking straight into my eyes, lied.
“Then you must have forgotten that we were close like real brothers.”
