# Chapter 24
The novel’s ending had changed.
I was the one who made it so. The past few months of rushing forward with the sole determination to save him flashed through my mind. Happy moments were rare, and it had been full of things I had to endure. Since they were all my choices, I didn’t feel any resentment. However, rather than feeling a sense of accomplishment for having achieved something, I only felt the helplessness of having exhausted all my energy.
I simply realized he was alive as I listened to Kadilen speaking calmly to Zendal. Hearing his heart faithfully pumping blood through his body, and his firm voice, created by the vibrations of his vocal cords, resonating in the air. I vividly felt the life I had saved.
“Where are you taking him! Ludin!”
“Don’t worry. You’ll see him tomorrow. Let him get some sleep tonight.”
The chaotic palace was settled with Jiman and me being confined in separate rooms. Throughout the journey and even after being locked up, I called out his name in case Jiman could hear me, but the responding voices gradually faded. I was anxious, having no way to confirm his location or condition.
The same was true for Zendal. When day broke, whether I wanted it or not, I would witness the rolling of the head of the man I had betrayed. I thought we might be confined together for being of the same royal family, but after hearing his calm final voice, I could find no trace of Zendal. I guessed they had deliberately placed all prisoners far apart from each other.
This place was too luxurious to call a prison. Perhaps because the underground prison in the palace was already full with existing prisoners and Zendal’s closest aides, I was temporarily placed in the building where the royal horses were kept. Just being able to lie on a place full of hay, not a hard wooden box, made my body feel languidly relaxed. I curled up tightly to gather as much warmth as possible and prayed for the day to pass quickly.
Tomorrow, along with Zendal’s death, the punishment for Jiman and me would also be decided.
Not all nobles and ministers would be killed, but those who formed a strong foundation for Zendal’s power would be purged. Before I could see the world that Kadilen, whom I had saved, would create, I would first have to witness the deaths of numerous lives. Perhaps that would be the last scene I could see. I tried to empty my mind and fall asleep.
Without knowing when I had fallen asleep, it seemed that time had passed just by closing and opening my eyes. I could tell by the cool wind carrying the smell of rain. The dark, dry night was now becoming damp. As I was blankly listening to the sound of rain, I heard the sound of someone stepping in puddles of water.
Thinking it was a guard coming to check, I didn’t raise my head. But the next moment, a gentle voice woke my tired body.
“Are you satisfied now?”
It was a light voice, as if asking an old friend how they were doing.
As I raised my body, tensing instantly, I saw a dark figure. It was Devan, looking down at me, his entire body wet as if he had come through the rain.
“How…?”
“I kept my promise. And now it’s your turn, Ludin.”
I hurriedly looked outside, but the soldier who had been watching me was nowhere to be seen. Kadilen still didn’t know Devan’s role. Very few knew that he had been under Zendal for a while. His identity as a magician only drew attention; he wasn’t someone tied to specific power. But since he had been on the opposite side of Kadilen for some time, even if Kadilen didn’t know the circumstances yet, it wouldn’t be good for him to be noticed.
“It’s dangerous here, let’s go first and later…”
“Afraid Kadilen will kill me?”
My head, which had been frantically looking around, stopped. I paused my words and looked at him. His hair, wet with rainwater, covered his eyes, making it impossible to read his expression. At my silence, he laughed softly.
“I’m afraid you’ll die. If you just die like this, I won’t gain anything.”
I didn’t know how to respond to talk of my death. Should I confess to him at this point? That even if Kadilen doesn’t punish me, I’m going to die eventually anyway? I was confused about what choice would repay my debt to him. Would it sound like I was seeking sympathy? Would I be taking away even his right to resent me through unnecessary compassion?
Amid these numerous thoughts, Devan’s next words reached me.
“Beg me. Beg me to save you.”
Everything seemed to settle, as if even the heavy sound of rain had stopped. If that’s what he wanted, I could beg him a hundred times. After all, when I initially proposed the deal to Devan, I had promised to spend my remaining time with him. But Devan’s command was too calm. I was confused about what he truly wanted.
As I hesitated, he added,
“You said you’d do anything. Beg me to save you. You’re locked up now, and I’ve come to rescue you.”
Unlike the content of his demand, his voice sounded like he was pleading. After a long deliberation, I opened my mouth.
“Save me.”
Despite it being the words he had said he wanted, Devan laughed emptily.
“Say it again.”
“…Save me.”
“Again.”
“Please save me, Devan.”
His laughter grew a bit louder. At the heightened sound, I hurriedly looked outside. There was still no sign of anyone.
“Ludin, you’ll need to try harder for the things I command from now on.”
“…”
“Begging with eyes that don’t want to live won’t help.”
No words came to mind. Devan wasn’t wrong. But the feeling of not wanting to live wasn’t depressing or despairing as it typically would be. In my case, it was equivalent to wanting to return to my world and live my life again. I was still straddling both worlds. And whether I wanted it or not, I would soon have to remove my foot from this place.
How on earth could I explain this feeling to him, and from where should I start?
“You contributed greatly to Kadilen’s victory, so you could beg him for your life.”
“…Please don’t tell him.”
The words burst out without time to think. It was something even I hadn’t expected to say. Did I want to play the role of a secret hero? What was the point when I would soon die anyway? Perhaps the biggest reason was the thought that even if I explained everything to him, he wouldn’t believe me. Despite bringing everything upon myself, I selfishly wanted to face the end peacefully, without begging for trust in the last moments. At my softly whispered request, the corners of Devan’s mouth turned up.
“Interesting. Why do you think I would tell him?”
“…”
“Then he would see you, why should I do that?”
I didn’t understand exactly what he meant by “see you.” Did he really think Kadilen would believe him? With Devan, it could be possible. He didn’t know the details of my actions. He only knew that I had deceived him, extracted information, and tried to save Kadilen but failed, and that Kadilen naturally wanted to kill me for being of royal blood. There was no way he could know about the curse.
Thinking about it, there were many strange points. Despite not knowing much, Devan didn’t ask me any questions. Why Ludin, who had been loyal to Zendal until being expelled from the palace, had decided to save Kadilen, and why, after acting for him, he hadn’t revealed the truth and ended up confined like this.
“Why don’t you ask me anything?”
The smile disappeared from Devan’s face. He quickly spat out words as if revealing a terrible truth.
“Do I need to ask? You said something changed after going to the temple. No one sacrifices without reason, something must have gone wrong somewhere.”
No one sacrifices without reason—he saw through my feelings for Kadilen. Gritting his teeth, he quickly finished speaking and bent his knees to match my height as I sat.
“I’m not interested in that. Since you said you’d do anything for me, I’ll just take you.”
The hair that had been sticking to his face due to the water was pushed back, and for the first time, I met his eyes. They were like Kadilen’s, a gaze as black as night.
“Maybe it’s for the best. This was always our relationship anyway. You at the bottom, allowing me to do whatever I wanted.”
“…”
“At least this time, I have the right to do so. Isn’t that enough?”
Despite speaking as if it were obvious, Devan’s eyes trembled continuously. It was also he who averted his gaze first.
I couldn’t know when or why Devan’s feelings for Ludin began. But what was clear was that unlike the previous Ludin, I had been with him. The first time I smiled in this place, after frantically chasing my goal, was when I was with Devan. But from his perspective, the happy month or so, everything I had done, must have been revealed as a deception to save Kadilen.
It wasn’t true. I really liked him.
But I couldn’t claim injustice for the hurt Devan received either. I couldn’t excuse deceiving him for my benefit. It became increasingly difficult to find words to add to this tangled relationship.
“I’m sorry.”
Despite my difficult apology, Devan finally rose without meeting my eyes. With each of his retreating steps, heavy raindrops followed.
“Wait a little. I can’t bear to see you die by someone else’s hand.”
As I watched Devan’s back disappear into the darkness, I suppressed my mixed feelings. The night quickly returned to silence as if nothing had happened. I couldn’t tell how much time had passed, but it felt like morning would arrive at any moment. I needed to get some sleep, but my complicated thoughts wouldn’t let me.
The soldier guarding the building where I was confined had returned to his post. Had Devan used some trick? Was he really a soldier from Kadilen’s temple? As I sat quietly looking outside, the soldier suddenly approached me. I was startled and moved away from the doorway.
Silently, the soldier slipped a piece of paper under the wooden fence. When I hesitated, he quietly gestured toward the paper with his eyes before returning to his post. I couldn’t understand the situation. I reluctantly checked the paper he had left. It was a letter written in a neat handwriting.
‘You’re begging for your life in the wrong place. Even if Devan saves you, you’ll eventually die anyway.’
Surprised, I looked around. The soldier I thought was guarding his post had disappeared again. The fact that the person who delivered the paper had heard my conversation with Devan meant they had been nearby until just now. Moreover, this content was clearly written by someone who knew about Ludin’s illness. I quickly checked the remaining content.
‘I am the only one who can save you. You’ve turned your back even on your family, so you should enjoy the rest of your life longer. I will visit you soon.’
I stood up, intending to find out who had sent the paper. As I put my hands through the high fence and rattled the lock, someone roughly grabbed my hand.
“What are you doing?!”
Judging by his attire, he was a soldier from the temple. Watching my actions with hostile eyes, he had a different face from the one who had given me the paper earlier. I hurriedly explained to him.
“Someone was here. It’s clearly someone who means no good for your master. Otherwise, there would be no reason to secretly seek me out. Go outside and look around right now!!”
Despite my desperate cries, he only secured the lock more firmly, as if he had heard a madman’s words. I showed him the paper and repeated my explanation several times, but he seemed to think I was trying to trick him and threatened me with his spear.
“If you don’t keep quiet, you’ll die before morning comes.”
It was a look full of mistrust, impossible to persuade. I said I understood, showing both my hands, and returned to the corner. He stood for a moment, waiting for me to become docile, then soon went outside to guard his post.
Jiman had said there were only two people who knew about Ludin’s illness. After realizing his illness, Ludin had done everything to step down from his position. His relationship with Devan was one of those things. If someone else knew about his situation, it meant they had just been watching as Ludin fell into the abyss without hesitation. Moreover, this person was claiming they could cure Ludin’s illness. Despite having such ability, they had been an observer of Ludin’s downfall.
I had no reason to cure the illness. Especially if it meant taking high-risk actions behind Kadilen’s back. My goal was to save Kadilen, and since he had taken the throne, I was willing to accept my fate.
However, what troubled me was that there was no way to confirm whether this person had the ability to harm Kadilen and others.
* * *
Along with worries that couldn’t be resolved, time flowed mercilessly.
The long night had passed, but heavy rain continued to fall. The sun, hidden by clouds, weakly concealed its appearance. Suddenly, there was a commotion outside, and two soldiers came in and bound me.
Without resistance, I was dragged to a place where all rebels and collaborators had gathered. Faces full of excitement were looking at me with interest from various places. In the distance, I could see Kadilen standing with his back straight. Wimu, standing next to him, was watching me being dragged in along with others.
I eagerly looked around to find Jiman. Eventually, I found him kneeling, bound like me, a little distance away. Even with fear in his eyes, he maintained a proper posture. I wanted to ask him about the paper I received last night, but the distance was too far for whispers to be transmitted.
Everything was still in disarray. It was the place where Zendal’s execution and the punishment for others, including myself, would be decided. But there were only whispering nobles and tense soldiers; Zendal was nowhere to be seen.
I continued to look around, trying to grasp the situation. Suddenly, I remembered a sentence from the paper I received yesterday.
‘I will visit you soon.’
A chill ran down my spine. Without any basis, my body reacted first. I recalled Zendal’s last voice, which had been excessively calm. As an odd sense of unease rose, when I raised my head to check Kadilen’s appearance again, I heard an urgent soldier’s voice.
“Zendal has disappeared!!!”
It was a foolish choice to shout the news in a place like this. The soldier, who appeared in a hurry without even properly dressing, ran toward Kadilen while receiving glances from around. Kadilen, with an unwavering face, quietly gestured to him. Small whispers were exchanged.
The nobles surrounding me were greatly shocked and scattered in panic. Jiman and I locked eyes.
“Be at ease. We will mobilize as much force as possible to find him. He has few soldiers left. Kill him on sight, but make sure to recover the body. The next ceremony will be newly conducted once Zendal’s head falls.”
Kadilen’s voice loudly echoed throughout the wide place. There were faces relieved by his reassuring voice, and others still shocked and uncertain what to do. I quietly fidgeted with the crumpled paper between my fists. Nothing could be certain until Zendal’s body arrived.
