Honestly, it was absurd. But this side had no other method and had its own logic.
Under the premise that the him without memory hadn’t gone endlessly insane and pounced on Gil Taeseo. No, even if the start really was like that with a one in a million chance, nothing would change.
The two had definitely overlapped bodies many times. Enough that the Beta trait, which had been doing decently in the middle, flipped to Omega and even resulted in pregnancy—probably very, very many times.
So, they both enjoyed it… was what he was saying.
‘It really is crazy talk.’
They say a needle thief becomes a cow thief, and while there are people who never do it, there’s no one who does it only once. So maybe this time too, they could somehow become that kind of relationship.
Saehyeon had to have a physical relationship with Gil Taeseo to hold onto his lifeline. But he had nothing to offer in return. What he had was truly, without exaggeration, just a body that could die any day.
“You felt good back then too.”
So he had no choice but to entice him like a con artist with false advertising. He hid the burden as if there was none and packaged it as if there was something to gain. Pretending to be skilled was part of that. Saehyeon first put on airs about something he didn’t even remember.
“You’re a man, so you have sexual desire, and you’ll have heat periods too.”
But that too was brief. The words that had started energetically at first gradually curled up as they went on. The same with his gaze. The empty cart that had been racing wildly making all sorts of loud noises seemed to flip over completely, unable to handle the speed.
Unable to look straight ahead, only the shoes of the man standing tall came into his gaze that had dropped to the ground. The toes that had been habitually kicking at the ground were fixed without moving an inch. No answer whatsoever came back from the owner of those feet.
Rattling off words alone in front of that was clearly a difficult task. All the more so because the content was embarrassingly crude and face-crumpling.
“So… since it’s come to this anyway, let’s do it once after a long time. Like before.”
Saehyeon’s ears, with his head deeply bowed, were red as if they’d burst.
“Just think of it as… a conveniently easy fuck buddy with no strings attached… it works, you bastard.”
He finished with slightly charged emotion at the end and sneakily gauged the reaction. The longer the silence, the more his face seemed to burn hot. The heat contrasting with his fingertips that had grown cold from tension made him pant for breath.
‘Wow. This really fucking sucks.’
It sucked more than he thought. What grand wealth and glory was he pursuing? He couldn’t believe he had to do this just to barely survive.
Thinking about it, it was always like that. Living wasn’t easy. But did it need to fucking suck this much?
His life’s first self-PR, and to a villain at that. Having to do it in such a lowly, sleazy way.
‘Wouldn’t it be better to just die like a man?’
Standing awkwardly in the silence, intense reality-check washed over him. Dying young from chronic illness, or dying from humiliation. Either way he’d die the same, but at least the former wouldn’t be this embarrassing.
“……Hey. Let’s just forget it. I don’t even know what bullshit I’m spouting. Just forget it.”
Saehyeon’s eyes sharpened as he waved his hands.
He wanted to let Gil Taeseo, who’d heard this story, know the distress of memory loss. He meant he wanted to smash him with a rock to gift him short-term memory loss.
He gave up because with these scrawny arms, he probably couldn’t even lift a rock big enough to crack that pretty head.
Just as Saehyeon turned around as if fleeing.
“Where to.”
A large hand grabbed his forearm. In the instant he felt body heat hot enough to burn, his body was yanked back. The gaze he’d barely been avoiding collided like an accident.
The man’s face seen like that was emotionless. It was as if a cool wind had stripped away his expression instead of body heat from the man.
But only the eyes were different. When his ashen eyes blazed fiercely, blades would pale in comparison.
“You rattle off this kind of shit in a row and then say let’s pretend it didn’t happen. Do I look like a fucking idiot to you?”
Combined with the menacing voice, even the dullest person could tell. Gil Taeseo was angry right now.
Saehyeon briefly pondered the reason. Fortunately, he could grasp it quickly. What he’d just said was so vile that even he found it hard to spit out.
Moreover, to come at him saying let’s do it with this pathetic body that even a gay guy probably wouldn’t get hard for. Maybe it was a miracle he hadn’t been hit.
“What are you pissed about now? I said let’s forget it.”
Thinking it was fortunate he’d quickly canceled it, Saehyeon furrowed his brows.
“A conveniently easy fuck buddy with no strings attached, fuck. What kind of fucking bullshit are you spouting, you.”
But Gil Taeseo kept spewing strange words. Saehyeon could answer this question right away. Without a moment’s hesitation, as if he’d been waiting. The answer popped out. Words close to instinct that didn’t go through thought.
“What I can give, and what might tempt you. That’s about that much.”
A brief impulse, juvenile lust. It would be about that much anyway. Before and now.
It must be that way. So why was Gil Taeseo making an expression like he’d been stabbed with a knife?
Saehyeon’s blatant gaze stuck into the face bearing an unfamiliar expression. As if feeling that gaze, Gil Taeseo slowly lowered his eyes then opened them.
‘Ah, he’s back to normal.’
It was a dramatic expression change as if swept clean with a broom.
While Saehyeon had useless thoughts, Gil Taeseo chewed and swallowed the shitty words thoroughly.
“……Right. If that’s what you think. Then that’s what it is.”
It felt like his mouth was full of glass shards. But he couldn’t complain about it. It was all something he’d brought upon himself. That Lee Saehyeon’s brain was filled with such thoughts.
“Then let’s do it.”
That this breathlessly gasping body had come to be.
So Gil Taeseo decided to play along. Because he couldn’t let him get scared and run away, or run off again saying it fucking sucked.
“That fucking, conveniently easy fuck buddy with no strings attached thing.”
The man secretly narrowed his eyes at the body that blankly followed along as he was pulled. As if to hide his ominous gaze.
***
“Get out.”
At the place they arrived after driving in the car for a while, Gil Taeseo hopped out of the car first. Saehyeon, who’d been hesitating, reached toward the child in the seat next to him. But this time too, Gil Taeseo made the first move.
The child who would have made him struggle seemed like a feather to the man. Gil Taeseo, who’d lifted the child right up with one arm, tilted his head.
“My transport fee is expensive.”
‘……That’s saying if I don’t get out myself, he’ll drag me out.’
Saehyeon, who didn’t want to increase his debt any more, hurriedly got out of the car. Perhaps because of his rushed mind, it was almost like jumping out.
“Ah, I’m getting out. I’m getting out.”
The surroundings he looked around after getting out were a quiet residential area. At first, he thought it was just one house standing tall alone in a desolate empty lot. The gaps between houses were excessively wide to that degree. Wide enough that he thought even if someone died inside, the house next door wouldn’t know.
“Where is this?”
“My house.”
He’d thought it looked like a gangster’s house, and as expected, it was correct.
“Why did we come to your house?”
“I don’t have a hobby of doing it outdoors. Why. Fuck, did you pioneer some new kink you hadn’t seen before? If you really want it, tell me in advance so I can at least consider matching it next time.”
“……Are you in your right mind?”
The way he rapidly spat out words with glittering eyes resembled that of a madman. In simple terms, it meant his eyes seemed to have rolled back. A large hand landed on the back of Saehyeon, who stepped back slightly as if feeling a sense of crisis. Even as he tried to stand firm instinctively, his body was pushed helplessly. The soles of his sneakers scraped the asphalt ground making an irritating scratching sound.
“Don’t push!”
“Then walk properly yourself. Should I teach you how to walk too?”
Saehyeon began walking on his own with a displeased face. Recalling the goal he’d followed along obediently up to this point, he couldn’t not walk.
The high, thick gray wall surrounding the exterior of the building resembled a detention facility more than a house. The firmly closed main gate opened as if it had been waiting. When he stepped over the threshold, a rustling sound was heard. At his feet that he looked down at, yellowed dead grass was being trampled.
Originally, it would have been a picture-perfect rich person’s countryside house consisting of a spacious garden and a sophisticated house. But the actual garden grounds had only withered grass and trees left behind like dregs, giving a ruined impression. The clean exterior of the building standing tall in the middle gave an even more unsettling and alien feeling.
Saehyeon walked hesitantly behind Gil Taeseo, who strode ahead. When they reached the building, Shin Seokwon, the driver who’d been following behind with his mouth closed, naturally opened the door. The pitch-black interior without lights opened its mouth wide toward the visitor. The house with blackout curtains tightly drawn all around was dark as if it were night despite being daytime.
When the door opened, both men’s gazes stuck to Saehyeon all at once. Saehyeon, pushed at the back by the silent urging, hesitantly stepped over the threshold once again.
“Then I’ll be going.”
“Yeah.”
Following the bland conversation sound, thud. A large hand pushed his back. With that as the last push, Saehyeon’s body completely entered inside the door.
Following the sound of shoe soles hitting the entryway floor, the heavy metallic sound of the door closing, and then a clear bell-like mechanical sound were heard. The last was the sound of the door lock engaging.
As if that wasn’t enough, Gil Taeseo extended his remaining hand to lock something more. Following the clattering sound, a chain was hooked on the door and another lock was fastened.
Despite being a rich house, there wasn’t even a sensor light in the entryway. A low voice split through the dim, empty space.
“Why. Is the entryway your taste following outdoors?”
“What?”
Gil Taeseo had been strange since earlier. No, he’d never been normal originally either, but it was like some switch had flipped on.
He threw out sexual vulgarity about outdoors or entryways like breathing. It was flustering.
He himself had been the one to suggest doing it first, but he hadn’t expected this kind of situation. Saehyeon, who’d raised his head questioningly, trembled slightly.
“Since you weren’t going in, I fucking thought maybe you couldn’t even wait the time it takes to get to the bed.”
Even to Saehyeon’s vision that hadn’t finished adjusting to the darkness, Gil Taeseo’s eyes were clearly visible.
“I can generously provide a trial version in advance, customer.”
At the man’s eyes that gleamed strangely, he gulped involuntarily.
