A large hand slowly caressed my side. If only my hands were free, I would have swatted his wrist away, but being unable to do so was frustrating.
“Ugh… your question is so childish.”
The hand caressing my side moved to my lower abdomen. As he sensually stroked the sensitive area, it became difficult to hold back my moans. He lowered his head and pressed his lips right against my ear.
“Childish? I’m being more serious than anyone right now… Who says childish things during intimate moments?”
“I’ll rephrase—your intentions are too transparent. You’re just trying to test me, aren’t you?”
“Why? Is that not allowed? When you like someone, it’s natural to be curious about their feelings.”
He sucked on my neck while touching me more persistently. I squirmed, crossing my legs, trying somehow to escape the stimulation coming from all directions at once.
When my hands weren’t tied, I could push him away whenever the stimulation became too intense, but now I had to feel everything fully, making it several times more difficult.
“Hmm? Tell me. Does Hahyun worry you that much?”
“O-of course he does!”
His touch stopped abruptly, and I poured out everything I wanted to say.
“He follows me around all day, cries like the world is ending at my every word, and desperately tries not to be hated by me. How could I not worry about someone like that? That would be asking for bad karma.”
It wasn’t something I should have said in front of Hajin, but it was my raw, honest truth. Looking at Hahyun made me feel guilty, like I was going out and leaving a pet dog behind.
“So you’re worried about him just because he likes you too much?”
“…”
My mouth closed even though he wasn’t stimulating my body.
While Hahyun was like a pet dog, if asked whether that was the only emotion, it wasn’t quite that simple.
“I…”
As soon as I opened my mouth, those blue eyes staring at me began to tremble, and in an instant, he covered my mouth.
“…Forget it. I think I know without you saying it, so don’t provoke me.”
I nodded with my mouth still covered.
“Who talks about another man during intimate moments? So inconsiderate.”
“Mmph, th… at.”
I wanted to ask what he meant, but with my mouth covered, I couldn’t ask.
“Be a bit more receptive today. Juwon.”
I stared at him with wide eyes.
He had already been doing whatever he wanted, and now even more? Thinking about how much worse it could get made my heart sink.
He began unbuttoning his shirt and slowly scanning every inch of me with languid eyes. Even though the hand covering my mouth was removed, I couldn’t say anything and just stared blankly.
He kissed me again. We exchanged hot breaths and explored each other’s mouths. Unlike before, it was a more intense and tender kiss.
“…Mmph.”
As he slowly undressed me, I surrendered my body to him with little resistance. His lips slid down, downward. My vision blurred, and heat rushed to my face.
* * *
“Fuck, ugh, damn it! Get off…”
I never thought I’d curse like this during what had started as a soft and heated act. As if obligated to fulfill his warning that he would do as he pleased, Hajin tormented me persistently.
Three times, four times? No, even more…
I felt like I might die from pleasure before clearing my murder charges.
I clung to him, sobbing.
“No, I’m sorry… I was wrong. Stop, please…”
Hajin still didn’t slow down, only speaking kindly with his mouth.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t help it. We might not be able to do this for a while…”
Fuck.
Guilt began to creep in as I remembered Hajin’s situation, which I had momentarily forgotten in the heat of passion.
Right, someone might go to prison because of me, and I can’t even handle this much? Thinking that way, I felt my strength returning. I really was a simple person.
He bit into my shoulder and panted.
“Yoon Juwon, tell me honestly. Are you really worried about me?”
“Haa… yes, of course.”
Was it the second time? From then on, Hajin repeated the same question like a parrot. Was he really worried about him… Did I pity him like I did Hahyun…
Just then, the phone placed beside us vibrated with a buzzing sound. It must be my phone since I had deliberately set it to vibration mode to distinguish it from Hajin’s.
It was obviously Hahyun, even without looking… Including the messages that came when I momentarily lost consciousness, there must have been more than 10…
Hahyun was really strange. What kind of mentality was it to tie me up saying not to do anything, then keep sending messages?
Even though it made sense that I couldn’t respond while tied up, I couldn’t help but feel concerned.
“Those messages, haa… keep coming… ah!”
“Fuck.”
Hajin, clearly displeased about something, pressed down on me with his body and cursed. Then he turned off my phone. His eyes glared down at me intensely.
“Yoon Juwon, are you a player?”
He asked in a low voice.
“Haa… ah.”
Driving a person to the brink of death… I’m not sure who’s calling who a player here.
“Seems like you’re still doing fine? You have the leisure to think about another man…”
“No, no… that’s not… aagh!”
My body was lifted up abruptly. Until now, he had been considerate of my limited movement due to the handcuffs, but as if he was done being considerate, he suddenly grabbed my body and began moving at his own pace. I was tossed around wildly like a balloon that gets blown about by the slightest breeze.
The pleasure that seemed like it would never end continued.
* * *
I dozed off briefly and then suddenly opened my eyes. Hajin was looking at me with a complicated expression. Though he deserved to be beaten up for what he had just done, his expression was so serious that I could only stare back at him blankly.
His gaze was so intense that I finally broke the silence first.
“Why are you looking at me like that? Do you want to have a staring contest?”
He smiled bitterly and said,
“Just trying to memorize as much as I can.”
“…”
Those words filled me with anxiety, making my mouth go dry.
“The prosecution will call me soon. If I’m lucky, it might end with just an investigation, but if I’m unlucky, I could be detained. Then we won’t be able to meet for a while. Hah…”
With a sigh, he stroked my hair and continued.
“I’ll do everything I can, so don’t worry too much…”
“How can you say that? How can I not worry when you might be detained…”
“Well, something will work out.”
“How can you be so irresponsible? Can’t you sell some land and buy more stocks even now?”
Even knowing it was too late, I blurted out anything that came to mind, desperate to grasp at straws. He smiled sadly and kissed my forehead.
“Did I use too much energy after so long? I’m tired.”
“You’re sleepy now?”
He slipped his arm under my neck and pulled me into his embrace.
“To win this fight, it’s best to get plenty of rest beforehand.”
My vision was blocked by his chest, and everything went dark. Sensing he wouldn’t answer any more questions, all I could do was hold him tightly. I patted his back and said in a barely audible voice,
“If you lose, I won’t like it, so you’d better win.”
I waited for him to say he would win, even if it was a lie, but no response came from him.
* * *
After fidgeting in Hajin’s arms for a while out of worry, Yoon Juwon fell asleep, breathing rhythmically. Hajin carefully raised himself up. Despite the discomfort from the handcuffs, Juwon hadn’t complained once, which made Hajin smile at how it suited the changed Juwon’s personality.
On the surface, Juwon pretended to be indifferent, but he was actually someone with more compassion and sensitivity than anyone, making him vulnerable to getting hurt.
Hajin gazed at his face quietly and then traced different parts of his face with his finger.
The forehead that glowed white, the straight, high bridge of his nose that divided his face down the middle, and those tantalizing lips that seemed like they might part with each breath…
Even before the change, his face had looked angelic when sleeping, but now he looked pure to the point of appearing naive.
“I’m sorry for deceiving someone as kind as you… But I was first, wasn’t I? What should I do if you end up liking Seo Hahyun more, Juwon?”
As if responding to his murmur, Juwon’s body twitched once and then gradually settled. Fearing he might pounce on him again if he kept looking, Hajin left the room and called Park Hyunwoo.
“Hyunwoo.”
– Yeah.
“Let’s call a meeting.”
– Huh?
Hyunwoo’s voice rose in pitch.
– What’s this about? I thought you said you’d stay locked up at home and wouldn’t come out until you won over your lover’s heart.
“When did I ever say that?”
– You did. You said not to even look for you until you contacted first.
It wasn’t easy to deceive an old friend who knew everything about him.
– As if acting like a jerk is something new for you to gain trust.
Despite his words, Hajin knew Hyunwoo was a friend who trusted him more than anyone. So Hajin didn’t rebuke Hyunwoo’s words and just laughed.
The loneliness that hadn’t been resolved even after embracing his lover multiple times seemed to have eased a little bit.
