Chapter 25
In truth, Secretary Kim wasn’t someone who could be treated carelessly. He was only called a secretary by convention—his actual position was director, and he held a significant stake in the company. Even the shareholders watched Secretary Kim’s reactions closely, so Hajin couldn’t afford to treat him recklessly either. Yet despite being insulted by Hahyun, who was much younger, this man simply smiled as if nothing had happened. He knew how to be patient when he wanted something.
Secretary Kim had lived like a slave under Chairman Seo for thirty years. But he didn’t want to live like that anymore. After spending his entire life like a dog, the result was having to serve some young brat—he was determined to prevent that outcome at any cost.
To do that, he first needed to win over the shareholders, and he had to use Hahyun, the chairman’s biological son, as his weapon. That’s why Secretary Kim desperately needed Hahyun on his side.
Secretary Kim spoke with a pitiful air, “At the time, I was in the same situation as you, young master, so I couldn’t look after you. I sincerely apologize.”
Hahyun openly mocked him. “Which time are you talking about, exactly? I first met you when Hajin hyung was nine and I was six—is that what you mean?”
Hajin had told him to endure it, to not show his hatred for Secretary Kim for the time being, but it was simply impossible. The young brothers had been beaten by Chairman Seo’s hands right in front of Secretary Kim’s eyes, more times than Hahyun could count. Not once had he helped them. Every single time, it was Hajin—only three years older—who had held him close and endured the beating.
“Fuck, if you’re going to follow someone around, at least be less obvious about it.”
Secretary Kim’s mouth snapped shut at Hahyun’s curse. Unable to contain his overflowing rage, Hahyun kicked Secretary Kim’s car. He kicked it so hard the headlamp shattered and rolled across the ground.
“Listen carefully. I know exactly what you’re thinking. Just drop it. Why do you think Chairman Seo gave the company to Hajin hyung instead of me? Because I’m the kind of bastard who can’t be controlled no matter how much you beat me, or even if you threaten to kill me. If Chairman Seo gave up on me, how the hell could someone like you possibly handle me? Haha, this is really funny. Well, goodbye then. You can talk to my brother about the repair costs. Tell him you were following a crazy bastard around and this happened, so he should pay for it.”
“Yes, I understand.”
Despite being treated so impudently by someone much younger, Secretary Kim didn’t say much. It was fitting behavior for someone who’d survived by clinging obsequiously to Chairman Seo all his life.
After returning to his car, Hahyun vented his anger by pounding the steering wheel. Lately, for the first time in his life, things had been fun because of Yoon Juwon. But the thought that Secretary Kim—who had clung to Chairman Seo like a cockroach and made the brothers’ lives miserable—might also jeopardize his relationship with Juwon was unbearable.
After hitting the steering wheel until his knuckles were scraped raw, Hajin’s words suddenly came to mind.
Hahyun, when father hurts you again and you can’t control your anger, close your eyes and imagine something. Something fun and enjoyable, or something exciting.
Hahyun closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He remembered Juwon pretending to sleepwalk in front of him yesterday. Just thinking about it made him laugh immediately. After laughing to himself for quite a while, Hahyun opened his eyes and muttered,
“Really, I’m going easy on you because you’re so damn cute. Otherwise, I think you would’ve gotten hit a lot, Juwon.”
All the way home, a twisted smile never left Hahyun’s face.
***
“Why are you trembling so much?”
Hajin asked, leaning back against the sofa. I looked at the clock while biting my fingernails. If something was going to happen because of yesterday’s incident, it would be now, while Hahyun wasn’t around. The clock showed 9 AM.
“Juwon, why aren’t you answering? Why are you trembling?”
“It’s nothing…”
“Nothing? Really, what’s going on? Are you sick? Hmm…”
Hajin pressed his lips together without saying anything more. His blue eyes were still shining fiercely, but he didn’t seem angry. Since Hajin wasn’t saying anything, I didn’t feel the need to speak first either, so I kept my mouth shut. After silence filled the tense atmosphere, Hajin finally spoke again.
“Ah, I get it! So this time our Juwon has aphasia, right?”
Even though it was a statement with so much left unsaid, I understood instantly. Seo Hajin knows. He knows what kind of act I pulled and how I deceived the brothers with my lies.
I mentally tried to calm my heart, which felt like it was about to shrivel up. My lips trembled as I tried to speak.
“Wh-what do you mean ‘this time’?”
“First amnesia, then sleepwalking, and now being unable to speak properly—that means aphasia…”
Hajin, who had been looking only at me this entire time, now deliberately avoided my eyes and muttered as if talking to himself.
“If not amnesia, sleepwalking, or aphasia…”
As I said this, Hajin’s gaze returned to me. With just one look, he could grasp and release a person’s heart at will.
“Can I possibly stay here? I don’t think I can live in this house with a sound mind.”
Hajin crossed his arms with an intrigued expression and observed me carefully. I clenched my fists so tightly that my nails dug into my palms. Hajin uncrossed his arms, leaned toward me, and smiled. It was a beautiful and affectionate smile, but so chilling that my body froze.
“Juwon, you should listen to what someone has to say before getting angry. If you get angry in advance, it’s unfair to me.”
“I’m not angry.”
“Then that’s fortunate…”
And then Hajin closed his mouth again.
Was his goal to kill me through sheer frustration? Or was he waiting to see if I’d confess the truth first? No matter how hard I tried to guess Hajin’s intentions, I couldn’t figure them out.
Having lost my resolve, I apologized without thinking.
“I’m sorry.”
“Oh…”
Hajin let out a brief exclamation.
“It’s okay. People get things like sleepwalking in life, right?”
Despite knowing the truth, Hajin was conveying very elegantly that he would pretend not to know this time—but don’t do it again. Even though I got the response I wanted, my mood didn’t improve.
Was covering everything up and pretending not to know about the secrets and incidents really the only answer? I didn’t think it was necessary for me to risk my life digging into the past.
“Thank you for understanding.”
“You’re smart, our Juwon.”
I suddenly felt uneasy about Hajin’s attitude—using informal speech with me while I spoke formally to him.
Yesterday, while lying down with Hahyun and talking about various things, I’d learned the brothers’ ages.
I’m twenty-three! And Hajin hyung is twenty-six.
Maybe it was because he’d inherited the company so young, or maybe it was just his natural disposition. The unique atmosphere Hajin possessed made him seem older than his actual age.
“Excuse me. I have a favor to ask.”
“Yes, go ahead.”
“Since I’m speaking formally to you, could Hajin-ssi please speak formally to me as well?”
Hajin laughed so hard he moved every muscle in his face. Although there was no sound, it was an expression of genuine amusement.
“I’m not joking, I’m serious. I’d appreciate it if you’d stop laughing.”
But Hajin didn’t stop laughing.
“Even if you have amnesia, how can you ask a childhood friend to speak formally to you? I feel like I’m going crazy from hurt feelings.”
Playfulness dripped from his tone.
“Precisely because I have amnesia, there’s no need for you to feel hurt. It’s fine with Hahyun-ssi because we both use formal speech. Hajin-ssi, you said we’re the same age, right? But it feels a bit strange when only you speak informally to me.”
He might say that for someone with amnesia, I was unnecessarily concerned about trivial things, but my reason for saying this to Hajin wasn’t simply because my original age was older than his, or because I felt uncomfortable.
If I wanted to live peacefully in this house, I couldn’t avoid the power struggle with Hajin. Although I’d lost our battle of wits repeatedly, I’d eventually led Hajin to do what I wanted—wasn’t that the same as winning?
To keep winning in the future, I felt we needed to be equals, starting from the way we spoke.
“Please use formal speech, at least until I regain my memories. Oh, and I have another favor.”
“Wow, our Juwon—how did you hold back all this time when you wanted to ask me for things? You have a lot of requests.”
“May I speak?”
“Yes, by all means.”
“I need a laptop. Of course, I don’t want internet access. I just want to be able to do simple document work. Ah… if it’s okay, I’d also appreciate it if you could install some puzzles or similar games.”
“For things like that, I’ll buy you a hundred if you want.”
“Thank you.”
I answered with a pleased smile. Hajin’s eyes watching me seemed somehow strange. It’s a bit awkward to say this myself, but it felt like… a boy with his first crush? But thinking about it again, it also seemed like a completely normal reaction. Although Hajin claimed with his words that he’d never loved Yoon Juwon, in reality he wouldn’t have brought home and confined a man he didn’t love.
Suddenly, Hajin stood up abruptly from the sofa and moved to sit beside me.
What is this? Now that we’ve finished the necessary conversation…
“Juwon-ssi, what’s today’s lesson plan? Ah, of course I know tonight is my turn, but it’s hard to wait until then.”
I just stared at Hajin’s face, unable to adjust to his suddenly changed demeanor. Hajin curled up the corners of his mouth and added,
“Ah, since our teacher values authority…”
His hand brushed along my arm. It felt like my body hair was standing on end.
“You can think of it as a preview for a student who’s full of enthusiasm for his studies.”
“…Pardon?”
“Ah, if that doesn’t suit you either, how about remedial lessons for an underperforming student?”
