Still, when he saved up money, the first thing he’d have to do was find a room. Yunoh looked at his notebook and counted the numbers. Next to it was a bundle of money wrapped with a yellow rubber band. Five bundles of one million won each—he’d finally reached that amount. He’d met his target amount.
“I’ve almost saved up the deposit.”
Still, anxious, he wanted to save more for cushion money for monthly rent, so he was relying on Boss Park and his wife’s kindness. It’s a bit shameless and embarrassing…. But there was no helping it. What he’d realized after running away from home was that you had to act a bit shamelessly to survive in the world. Even knowing that, it was difficult every time.
Yunoh pulled the hot pink microfiber blanket the ma’am had given him up to his chin and rolled onto his side. He hid the precious bundle of money inside the bag he’d brought when leaving home.
The wind blew fiercely. At times like this, the creaking crane was scarier than the cold. There were more than a few times when he’d wake up startled even in his sleep from imagining the giant crane dropping down. Yunoh stretched out his arm to close the window again and curled up his body once more. Since his body was tired, sleep came easily regardless of his anxious heart.
As he was about to fall asleep, Yunoh unconsciously twitched his lips.
For a long time, it had been routine for Yunoh to have vivid dreams like a conception dream appear like an uninvited guest between reality and sleep. Lately it had been especially severe. When that happened, Yunoh couldn’t move an inch under those yellow eyes.
Even at night, flashing yellow eyes glare at me. If I turn around, it will immediately pounce, tear my back and bite my neck. When I freeze like that, black stripes and orange fur, bluish yellow light follow—I’m bound by all those colors.
‘You dreamed of your pair.’
That was all anyone said to Yunoh who cried every night after waking up scared from this dream. Even while watching a child sobbing as if someone had pinched him hard, everyone smiled, not knowing what to do because he was so cute. They even urged him to tell more about that dream. Even though he didn’t want to recall it. Even though he wanted to run away. Even though he felt like he’d die and couldn’t do that. He resented the adults.
The adults thought Yunoh was admirable.
‘Your pair must be an amazing person. Yunoh-ya. From now on you must always keep that dream in mind and behave properly. Study well too, and be diligent.’
Grandmother even gave stern warnings.
He couldn’t understand why that thing that seemed like it would devour him was a reason he had to live kindly, diligently, and righteously. That beast called his pair might be living badly, lazily, and wickedly.
So even today after running away, Yunoh has that dream. More frightening than the icy draft is the crane above, and more frightening than the crane is the beast facing Yunoh.
Recently… in his dreams the beast keeps approaching. Yunoh is scared of that.
***
Now having developed the knack to somehow satisfy his need for sleep even when he slept poorly, Yunoh opened the faucet with a slightly swollen face. To prevent freezing, he had to wrap it with newspaper, wrap that with a blanket, wrap it again with layers of styrofoam, and even that wasn’t enough so he had to leave water trickling every night. Still, by morning there was thin ice inside the hose.
Washing his face with cold water cleared his head instantly. Yunoh brushed his teeth vigorously until his frozen, reddish cheeks bulged.
Today they said they’d serve stir-fried anchovies on the menu for the first time in a while. Stir-fried anchovies with not large anchovies but small dried anchovies with nuts like peanuts added and simmered sweetly were always popular. It was also a side dish Yunoh liked. While organizing in his head the ingredients he needed to prep, Yunoh finished rinsing his mouth.
From early morning, large cargo trucks and concrete trucks lined up to enter. Winter construction had many difficulties. Concrete, so-called “gonguri,” froze easily and the sun rose late. Working hours naturally decreased. Yunoh rubbed his face with a towel while watching workers walking leisurely behind the vehicles. The container where Yunoh stayed was hidden behind the Korean buffet building, so they couldn’t easily spot this side.
“It’s a bit warm today.”
Yunoh was about to turn around when he muttered that. In the distance he saw a luxury sedan. It wasn’t unusual. There were more than a few people who came to see the construction site in advance. Yunoh thought nothing of it and entered the container.
Before changing clothes, he closed the window he’d left open for ventilation and applied cheap lotion. Boss Park said he’d snatched it from a friend who ran a bathhouse, seeing how Yunoh’s skin was thin and easily became dry and cracked. Yunoh couldn’t apply the stinging skin toner and barely managed to apply just the lotion. It smelled like his father. It was a bit funny and a bit sad.
“Yunoh, you here?”
Opening the shop door and turning on the heater was Yunoh’s job. As was leaving the faucet running until warm water came out. By the time hot water came out, he’d made three cups of mixed coffee. When he finished stirring the third cup and set it down, right at that moment Boss Park and his wife arrived for work.
He was a capable kid. Boss Park cherished Yunoh. Today too, as always, the face that said “Please have some coffee” as he offered it was clear and pretty. The fact that he was diligent and didn’t have sneaky thoughts was also good.
However, though not to brag, Boss Park had seen and experienced all sorts of things, so he knew well how precarious people who were this pretty yet had no greed and no backing to look after them were. He’s quite tall though. He should at least build up some muscle. Today too, Boss Park smacked his lips thinking he’d get nagged by his wife.
“I’ll roast the peanuts in advance.”
“Our Yunoh is a blessing, a blessing.”
Receiving even the affection of Boss Park’s wife who didn’t trust people easily, there was no need to ramble on at length about what Yunoh’s conduct was like. The couple looked at Yunoh’s back with affectionate eyes. They’d considered his quietness an advantage, but now it had reached the point of being regrettable.
It was Boss Park who’d picked him up getting beaten at the back door of a nightclub. Boss Park’s wife, who first saw Yunoh, thought this kid would be no different from other punk kids, but the more time passed, he wasn’t. So naturally she became curious. Why he’d been there, why he’d been getting hit without resisting at all.
“Did you sleep well, Yunoh?”
At the hand patting his back, Yunoh nodded and smiled. In truth he hadn’t slept well at all. But to Yunoh this was such an ordinary daily occurrence that answering that he slept well didn’t feel like a lie.
“Bring some corn syrup from over there. I’m going to stir-fry it sweet.”
Boss Park headed to the food storage without complaint.
Yunoh, who’d been gulping down the remaining mixed coffee, suddenly spotted a familiar figure beyond the window. It was the man he’d seen yesterday. The one who’d asked if there was more young radish kimchi.
The man was tilting his head while on a call, and wasn’t wearing any of the required attire like a vest and helmet. Rather, he was dressed as if he could go straight to a funeral. White shirt with a black jacket and trousers. Wasn’t he cold?
Just then their eyes met. Yunoh ended up nodding. The man stared in this direction for a moment, then turned his body sideways. Even at the blatant disregard, Yunoh didn’t mind.
“Yunoh-ya. Let’s get ready.”
He heard a voice calling from inside. He crumpled the paper cup and threw it in the trash.
The man outside the window followed Yunoh’s retreating back with his gaze.
***
“Yunoh.”
Many people were asking for young radish kimchi, so they were preparing kimchi filling to make some during breaks today. They put in radish greens generously so even just eating the filling was delicious. Yunoh blinked while eating the radish greens the ma’am handed him.
“Do you perhaps not have parents?”
“Uh….”
“I’m sorry for asking this kind of question, but there’s something I want to say. To say that, I have to ask this.”
His parents are alive. And they’ll be alive. They might be troubled though. All because of Yunoh’s running away. At the face that instantly darkened, Boss Park’s wife guessed roughly.
“If you perhaps don’t have them or your ties are severed.”
It was a story that had been cautiously exchanged between the couple for half a year. When she tried to say it out loud to the person in question, her tongue dried up. She pointlessly chewed on spicy radish greens to buy time. Yunoh too was caught in his own contemplation and didn’t notice time passing.
After an awkward silence flowed for a while, Boss Park’s wife spoke.
“Will you be our son?”
“What?”
At the proposal he’d never expected, Yunoh’s head shot up. In the year and a half they’d spent together, this was the first time Yunoh had raised his voice this loud and opened his eyes this wide, so the tension she’d built up to bring up the topic melted away futilely.
“Oh my. Now you finally look your age. You were acting so detached like someone who’d lived eighty years.”
“M-ma’am. Why are you saying such…. I mean….”
“It’s real. We like you. You knew we cherish you, right?”
Of course he knew. But at most he’d thought they regarded him as a diligent employee. Yunoh wasn’t tactless—he had no leeway. Having no leeway made it hard to look around him.
Unlike his surprised head and ticklish chest, his mouth wouldn’t open as if sealed with wax. He was grateful for the proposal. But the truth was he had family…. Even though he was the one who didn’t contact them and ran away from them.
“You can answer slowly. Really.”
Though she’d already guessed the answer plenty, she asked kindly to the end. Yunoh bit his lip and nodded with indescribable gratitude. Meanwhile his hands moved even faster. Right now, the only way he could repay them was to thoroughly fill the filling between each cabbage leaf, so that’s all he did.
“Oh goodness. This batch of kimchi will be salty because of our Yunoh.”
She said that seeing the tears dripping from Yunoh. Yunoh cried and then laughed.
***
“Idiot.”
Yunoh, clutching his notebook, spat out.
“You don’t even know this. Aren’t you stupid? No, you really are stupid….”
