“Wake up, Yeoul-ah. Let’s eat something.”
…When did I fall asleep? Yeoul rubbed his eyes with an absurd feeling. He must have dozed off again while listening to the sounds of meal preparation. The sunset scene outside the window had already disappeared, and pitch-black night had settled in.
Hyeseong was sitting in front of the sofa holding a bowl that gave off a delicious smell. At a glance, it looked like cream risotto with seafood.
Delight immediately blossomed. It was food he used to make often a long time ago, back when they were both students. The time when he was already used to his busy parents’ absence and they freely came and went between each other’s houses, spending time together as if it were natural.
“Ah, say ‘ah.'”
“No, no. Give me the spoon and bowl. I can eat by myse… ah.”
As he hastily reached out his hand, his arm suddenly lost strength as if it were a lie. Yeoul lost his words and blinked. He’d been fine just moments ago, so why was this suddenly happening again…
Both suddenly falling asleep like a sick chicken and not being able to properly hold a spoon were bewildering. His body didn’t feel like his own body at all.
“I told you the sedative’s effect is temporary. You’ll probably start suffering from awakening pains in earnest starting tomorrow.”
“Awakening pains…?”
“Yeah. For about a week, you need to rest fully without doing anything. So now, obediently open your mouth.”
Since hyung, who’s already experienced it, says so, it must be true. Yeoul didn’t stubbornly resist anymore and opened his mouth weakly.
Hyeseong blew on a spoonful of risotto to cool it appropriately before putting it in his mouth. The Kang Hyeseong-style risotto, both savory and appropriately salty, was truly delicious.
Come to think of it, when he was lying down after being discharged from surgery at age nine, Kang Hyeseong had made this for him too… It was a nostalgic taste he was feeling after a long time.
“It’s totally delicious! How long has it been?”
Yeoul smiled brightly.
“Risotto made by hyung is really the best.”
“Yeah. Eat slowly.”
While admiring Kang Hyeseong’s face smiling with gently softened eyes, Yeoul slowly accepted the risotto. The habit of chewing slowly and for a long time from childhood remained even now that he was an adult, which was sometimes embarrassing, but Hyeseong had never once scolded him to eat faster.
“Hyeseong-ah, you need to eat too. It’s supposedly your homecoming celebration party…”
“Ah, Auntie. I’ll eat after I feed Ulie first.”
The adults were sitting in the kitchen having drinks, passing beer back and forth. Yeoul’s mother called to Hyeseong worriedly, but he immediately shook his head.
“Hyeseong still takes care of our Yeoul like that.”
“Just like his own child, right?”
“Exactly. He’s like a son, completely.”
Mother and Auntie giggled. I’ve lived my whole life hearing I’m like his real younger brother, but now a son… They really say all kinds of things. Yeoul’s face heated up, but Hyeseong, the actual person in question, seemed unfazed.
“Now let’s take your medicine too.”
“Okay.”
Hyeseong, who came with medicine and a water cup, knelt on one knee in front of the sofa. He even personally tore open the medicine packet and dropped the pills into his mouth. The overprotectiveness seems especially excessive today… but since he was sick, he decided to just let it be.
When he lay back down on the sofa, dizziness more severe than before came rushing in. As his eyes slowly closed, Hyeseong’s hand touched his forehead. At the affectionate touch gently stroking his hair, something inside his chest slowly melted.
“Hyung, I’m… sleepy again.”
“Okay, let’s go in and sleep.”
With his stomach full, drowsiness poured out uncontrollably. Hyeseong, who’d keenly picked up on the small murmur, reached out his hand. Then he lifted Yeoul up in his arms like a princess. Yeoul, who’d thought at most he’d just hold his hand and help him up, opened his eyes wide.
“Wh-what are you doing. I’ll go by myself.”
“Stay still. I went to the trouble of feeding you, so don’t waste your energy.”
Kang Hyeseong calmly stopping him, and the parents dying of laughter saying to look at that… Yeoul buried his face in his shoulder to hide his burning cheeks.
Even if I’m sick, is it really okay to lift up an adult man like this? Today really felt like he’d become a baby.
He thought he’d open the front door and go out like that, but the place Hyeseong headed was his room. Since Yeoul’s house was right next door, it would be fine to go there…
“Hyung, I can go to my room…”
“You’d feel lonely alone. It’s better to sleep while hearing the sounds of family chattering warmly.”
Well, that was true too. Since they already lived as if his house was Hyeseong’s house and Hyeseong’s house was his house, there was no reason to insist further.
His body was carefully laid down on the soft bed. In the dark room, Hyeseong’s face as he stood looking at him was faintly colored by the light seeping in from the living room.
“Thanks for today, hyung. You came back after so long, but I made you suffer from the first day…”
It had been a meeting he’d looked forward to for a year. He hadn’t expected at all that today would end so absurdly like this.
He felt sorry for making Hyeseong, who must have had a hard time in a foreign country the whole time, suffer as soon as he returned home, but on the other hand, he also had the selfish thought that he was so fortunate that Hyeseong was by his side at such an important moment.
What would it have been like if I’d collapsed when hyung wasn’t here? Words like awakening and Guide would probably have felt different from now. Much more unfamiliar and overwhelming.
With Hyeseong reliably guarding his side now, Yeoul wasn’t scared at all about becoming a Guide. He just felt dazed as if dreaming.
“Such a little thing saying all kinds of things.”
He chuckled as if absurd. The touch messing up Yeoul’s hair was mischievous and rough, but it felt good because it was refreshing.
“Get some sleep. I’ll come check your temperature later.”
“Okay…”
Finally, Hyeseong, who tidied up his hair with pats, turned on a soft indirect light before opening the door with a clack and leaving. It was a naturally flowing motion befitting someone who knew well that Yeoul hated darkness.
Yeoul, left alone in Hyeseong’s space, slowly blinked and traced the dim room with his gaze. Even though it was a place he’d entered and exited several times even when he wasn’t here, it felt strangely new. The room that had been lifeless like a barren field while he was gone now seemed to be alive and breathing again.
The dress uniform hung neatly. The combat uniform hanging orderly next to it. Several photos of Hyeseong taken with him. Looking at his and Hyeseong’s youthful faces gradually growing up inside the several frames, Yeoul smiled warmly.
And… Kang Hyeseong’s scent filling his heart.
‘…I like it… so much.’
I like it. I like it so much.
But why do I also feel a stinging pain?
It felt like hot flames were gathered in his chest. The kind of flames that could never be extinguished even if Kang Hyeseong’s hands, which handled cold ice, touched them. Rather, the kind of heart that would burn even hotter at his touch.
In the room filled entirely with Kang Hyeseong, Yeoul pulled up the blanket and covered his face. Deep, thick drowsiness came rushing in frighteningly.
***
“Oh dear, Hyeseong, I feel so sorry for you.”
At the sound of Mother’s voice coming through the crack of the open door, Yeoul slowly opened his eyes. The ceiling that came into view was familiar, but it wasn’t his room.
“What are you saying? Yeoul is like my real younger brother.”
“Still… I always feel indebted to you, Hyeseong-ah.”
It seemed to already be morning. Mother’s voice, and the sound of Auntie busily moving around. At the warm sounds of daily life, Yeoul blinked and stretched. Even though he’d slept deeply and woken up, his mind was hazy and his body was heavy like a lump of lead.
“You’ve raised him since he was young, not me. Even now that Yeoul’s all grown up, he only owes you like this.”
“If you say that, I’ll be upset. It’s something I did because I wanted to. We’ll be late at this rate, Auntie. Don’t worry and have a comfortable trip.”
A calm and gentle voice was heard. Starting the day with Kang Hyeseong’s voice instead of the morning news… It finally felt real that he’d returned. Yeoul smiled faintly while lying down.
“Then I’ll leave him in your care, Hyeseong-ah. Should I go say goodbye to Yeoul before I leave?”
“Ah, Ulie is sleeping right now. I think it’s better to let him sleep deeply.”
“Okay, okay. Then we’ll be going.”
He heard the sounds of the parents and Auntie all leaving for work at once. I’m not sleeping though… He wanted to go out and at least say goodbye, but his body was too heavy to even sit up easily. Yeoul gave up on going out to see them off and let out a blank sigh.
…But come to think of it, doesn’t Kang Hyeseong always leave for work at dawn? Why isn’t he going to work today?
“…You were awake?”
“You scared me.”
Kang Hyeseong, who’d opened the door and entered at some point, sat on the edge of the bed. A cool hand parted his bangs and touched his forehead.
It’s refreshing. Yeoul, who unconsciously took a deep breath, raised his trembling hand and grasped Hyeseong’s wrist.
“It feels so good… It’s refreshing.”
Hyeseong was silent. His wrist flinched very slightly. The gaze looking down at him felt so unfamiliar for a moment that Yeoul blinked slowly. Come to think of it, yesterday too… didn’t he move uncomfortably when their hands touched?
“It hurts a lot, doesn’t it.”
“…I’m okay… Just, a bit dizzy… and my breath is hot.”
“Even if it’s hard, let’s eat breakfast. I made abalone porridge.”
“I don’t have an appetite…”
He unconsciously blurted that out and regretted it a little afterward. Because it seemed like he’d acted spoiled to Kang Hyeseong, who already treated him like a child.
Sure enough, Hyeseong smiled with a playful expression.
“Good boy, our baby. But you need to eat something to take your medicine.”
“…I’m not a baby.”
He said that firmly, but even to himself, it lacked persuasiveness. Being held in Kang Hyeseong’s arms and lying in his bed, complaining that he had no appetite, and accepting the food he was being fed…
I’m not like this outside. It seemed like he only became a child in front of Kang Hyeseong. His college friends would probably gasp if they saw him like this.
“You’re eating well. You said you had no appetite.”
“Of course. I’m not a baby.”
Kang Hyeseong, who’d been blowing on the porridge to feed him, laughed with a puhup and lowered his head. Yeoul glared sharply at him, but he paid no attention and even shook his shoulders as he laughed. Infuriating Kang Hyeseong, as always.
After finishing the meal and taking medicine, drowsiness came rushing in again. After sweating profusely, he felt a bit chilly. Noticing this, Hyeseong covered him with a thick blanket. Yeoul, surrounded by the cozy blanket, quickly became hazy. Sweet sleep like a dream swept over his whole body.
“Sleeping like a baby.”
Hyeseong’s voice was heard faintly from a distant place. It was hard to tell if it was a dream or reality. But his eyelids were too heavy, and Kang Hyeseong’s voice that he was hearing now felt good, so… Yeoul decided to stay as he was.
“Ul-ah.”
A quiet voice resonated.
“…Your waves, they’re vibrating.”
Hyeseong’s way of speaking as he chewed on those words was very unfamiliar. It was an intonation he’d never heard before.
Waves… Even while hearing it, the word that he couldn’t quite understand was hazily and dimly embedded in his mind. At the same time, his unconsciousness became even more murky.
As if the cold sweat and chills had never existed, terrifying heat came rushing in. His condition surged like waves, being fickle.
He suddenly longed for something cold. Super Ultra Ice Gun… His consciousness stretched out to a very distant place. At that moment, Hyeseong’s cool hand touched his forehead. As if reading Yeoul’s mind.
A temperature that was cold to be considered normal body heat, but not painful enough to be called ice… Hazily realizing that he was using his ability to cool his fever, Yeoul once again slipped beyond consciousness. Without even noticing that he was slowly rubbing his cheek against Hyeseong’s hand.
