Even his smiling profile as he looked back was too pretty. Hakyoung, who had been staring blankly at that face, came to his senses a beat late.
“Sorry.”
“What are you apologizing for?”
“I wanted to hug you too much.”
“……”
“Can’t I just hold you for a moment?”
At those words, Yumyeong’s expression stiffened slightly. Not noticing this, Hakyoung pulled Yumyeong into his arms with force again.
“I missed you. Did you?”
When he took a deep breath while hugging him from behind, Yumyeong’s shoulders flinched a little.
“Hey, wait…… that tickles.”
Giggling and muttering, he tried to turn his body and push his shoulders away a bit. However, Hakyoung didn’t budge and was just happy with the face that finally looked completely toward him. When he unknowingly tried to bring his lips close, Yumyeong hastily spread his palm and pressed down firmly to block his lips.
“Wait! Why are you acting so hastily?”
“Me?”
Hakyoung just blinked, feeling a bit guilty. No matter how he might look on the outside, his head was spinning hotly with heat. Just smelling the shampoo scent faintly wafting from Yumyeong’s nape was enough to make his breathing quicken.
“Yeah. You’ve had no focus in your eyes since earlier. That’s not like you? You weren’t originally like that.”
“What did I……”
But he couldn’t even remember how he’d originally treated him. Rather, he was a bit hurt by Yumyeong’s criticism. When they were meeting after such a long time, wouldn’t it be stranger if he could maintain composure?
While waiting for him alone in the dormitory throughout the break, he’d made every effort not to resent Yumyeong. Let’s not blame him since it wasn’t his fault that they were suddenly separated. But inevitably, the bottom of his heart began to boil.
Sending only him away without any explanation.
Not even contacting him.
Leaving him alone the entire break and saying I’m not like myself?
He stared quietly, but Yumyeong didn’t realize this and rather raised his voice.
“Earlier too, while I was talking, you just kept staring at me.”
“……Me?”
“Yeah. Where did you sell off your social skills?”
“Social, skills……”
“You’re being too obvious. Everyone will look at us strangely.”
“Sorry……”
Suppressing his boiling heart, Hakyoung apologized again. Actually, because everything Yumyeong said was right, listening to it made him embarrassed too.
Acting with only his heart ahead toward someone he likes…… He felt like an idiot for being unable to control his emotions to the point of being obvious.
“I really only saw you earlier. I’ll be careful from now on.”
When he spoke sullenly, Yumyeong, who had been staring at him, cleared his throat.
“No, you don’t need to apologize……”
“……”
“But you’re incredibly honest? Are you originally like that when you come to like someone?”
Yumyeong smiled brightly. Hakyoung carefully observed Yumyeong’s reactions and approached bit by bit.
“I don’t know…… But then, can I be obvious now?”
“……”
“No one’s looking.”
“Hey……”
After pulling the speechless Yumyeong tightly into his arms again, a while later.
He released the strength he’d been holding as if he couldn’t win. Then he finally pulled Hakyoung’s shoulders into an embrace too. Feeling that touch rubbing his back, the anxiety that had unknowingly formed seemed to melt away softly.
Hakyoung muttered shyly.
“It’s because I waited for you too much. If I hold you a bit, I’ll calm down.”
“What does that mean?”
“You know, there’s that thing where when it hurts, you press hard to make it hurt less. It’s adapting myself to the pain.”
“Why would you do that? Are you a pervert?”
“It’s not that…… I’m saying if I hold you a bit, I’ll calm down too. It’s adapting myself to the stimulus.”
At the uncool rambling words, Yumyeong giggled soundlessly. Just hearing that laughter made his stomach tickle as if butterflies were flying around inside.
“Yumyeong.”
When his lips brushed against his cheek, he stopped laughing. His heart pounded at the instantly serious atmosphere. Gripping his waist tightly with both hands, when he brought his lips to those pink lips, Yumyeong turned his head away as if flustered.
“Wait.”
“Yumyeong……”
At that moment, their eyes met. In those clear black eyes, his own face was reflected. Unlike his own appearance excited with arousal, seeing Yumyeong’s expression finding this awkward brought him sharply to his senses.
This was already the second time being rejected for a kiss. His lips were parched.
When he moistened his dry lips, Yumyeong’s pupils followed.
“Don’t you want to?”
“It’s not that, but this is the dormitory.”
Yumyeong’s face, turning his head to the side and lowering his eyes, was calm. At the same time, the presence of someone passing noisily through the hallway was heard right beyond the door.
“Whew……”
Running his hand through his hair, Hakyoung stepped back about a hand’s width again. He needed to get a grip on his anxious heart a bit. Unlike himself who could only see his partner, Yumyeong was looking at the situation objectively.
“Sorry.”
Somehow thinking he seemed to be only apologizing continuously, Hakyoung felt ashamed.
At the same time, the thought of whether this was something he should apologize for.
But he disliked doing things Yumyeong disliked even more. Because his desire to be considerate of him was greater than realizing his own desires, Hakyoung took a deep breath.
“I guess I was hasty.”
“No……”
“I won’t do things you don’t like.”
Then Yumyeong made eye contact with him quietly.
Unlike himself who just found his partner pretty, Yumyeong had originally liked women. If he acted too impatient, he might feel a sense of distance anew.
Though it was shocking that even after confirming each other’s hearts, their pace could be different, it was also quite understandable.
Hakyoung again tried actions Yumyeong liked from the start, step by step. He gently stroked his arms, and when he stayed still, he pulled him into an embrace again and buried his face in his shoulder.
So up to here is okay.
Yumyeong likes hugs as much as he does. Especially being hugged tight enough to be breathless.
He had to soothe him gently while doing things he liked. Whether that strategy hit the mark, Yumyeong again generously accepted Hakyoung. When he burrowed in and hugged him more, Yumyeong’s willing laughter burst out by his ear.
“You’re like a dog.”
“……What?”
“Ah, no, not a dog but a puppy……”
“That’s too much.”
“Whenever there’s a gap, you try to cling to me. I mean, it’s like you’re acting cute to me.”
Though his heart was complicated at being treated like a dog, even that subsided when he felt the touch gently caressing the back of his head.
“So you don’t like it?”
“No…… I like it.”
At Yumyeong’s words, Hakyoung could finally smile.
Even amid all this, the presence of students coming and going in the hallway didn’t cease. Just as someone’s shout racing through the hallway was heard, Hakyoung reached out and locked the door altogether. Then Yumyeong giggled and muttered.
“Hanju won’t be able to get in.”
“He’ll knock on the door on his own.”
“When will he come? Should I call him?”
At those words, Hakyoung suddenly remembered what he’d forgotten.
“Right, what happened to your phone? It said it was a number that doesn’t exist……”
“Ah, my number changed. I’ll let you know again.”
Yumyeong spoke nonchalantly and took out his new phone. That attitude was so calm that all the various speculations he’d made seemed futile. The time he’d spent anxious felt unjust too.
Hakyoung raised his eyebrows and asked abruptly.
“But why didn’t you contact me?”
“Ah…… all the numbers got deleted. It’s not that I couldn’t only to you. How would I memorize numbers?”
“There are ways to contact besides phone calls.”
There were messenger apps that connected as long as internet was available, and there was also the message inbox of the SNS account that had just been created, so excuses didn’t work. However, Yumyeong chuckled and ruffled Hakyoung’s hair.
“So, are you sulking?”
The attitude of trying to brush it off lightly rather set fire to his heart. Hakyoung responded with a wronged voice.
“Sulking? Just sulking? Do you know how my heart felt?”
“Just save the number. Zero-one-zero……”
Though Hakyoung had a displeased face, he fumbled to take out his phone and saved the number. Whether the sight of him diligently doing as told was funny, Yumyeong burst into laughter. Hakyoung hardened his face even more.
“Don’t pass it off as a joke.”
“It’s not a joke. Just, there really wasn’t an opportunity.”
“I’m saying I was really worried.”
“Worried……”
“Yeah.”
“You were worried?”
Yumyeong grinned and wrapped his arms around his neck. With just that small movement, Hakyoung’s face turned bright red enough to burn again. When he barely answered with a voice crawling in saying “Yeah,” Yumyeong fiddled with his cheeks and lips. While wondering what meaning this touch had, Hakyoung even breathed carefully.
He muttered bitterly.
“……I thought you’d be angry.”
Hakyoung shook his head.
“Why would I be angry? I won’t get angry at you. It’s not even your fault.”
“……”
“I just missed you. ……And I was curious. Whether you were okay.”
Then Yumyeong smiled. At the smile of unknown meaning, Hakyoung’s heart just beat futilely again.
“I’m obviously okay.”
It was a clear answer.
However, it only seemed that way on the surface, and it felt like it held an implication as if to cut it off and not approach further.
Honestly, Hakyoung had hoped a bit that he would explain what had happened during the break even now. However, Yumyeong’s words really ended right there.
He felt that strange wall he’d felt before. But that couldn’t be. Since confirming their hearts not long ago, their relationship should be running at its peak.
Though it was hard to believe Yumyeong’s words at face value right now, Hakyoung didn’t press further out of trust in the one he liked.
“Yeah, if you’re okay, then I’m okay too.”
“Yeah, thank you.”
Yumyeong tilted his head. Approaching as if to kiss, he brought his cheek to Hakyoung’s cheek. The touch of the cheek that brushed instead of lips was so lovable that his vision spun.
What should I do, liking you more and more?
With a yearning heart, Hakyoung pulled Yumyeong into an embrace hard enough to suffocate him.
