“…There’s no particular need to apologize, just remember one thing.”
It was too late, really very late, but Yeo Dowoon wanted to maintain at least a minimum distance from him now. Because they weren’t lovers, nor were they in a relationship that would become lovers. Unless it was a relationship where even harboring the wish to be allowed to become lovers was absurd—maybe that was possible.
So for Yeo Dowoon, focusing on his given mission and calling was the top priority. Therefore, he built up his resolve as if hypnotizing himself.
If he had any human-like conscience, let him be satisfied with being able to protect him. Let’s end it here.
Yeo Dowoon asked Cha Haseong.
“Do you remember the promise that I would protect you no matter what? Because of that promise alone, I cannot agree to the joint operation. Please stay safe…….”
“If you’re telling me to shut up and stay quiet, there’s no need to beat around the bush. I understand.”
When Cha Haseong cut off his sentence midway and snapped, Yeo Dowoon answered neatly with a tired face.
“Yes. I’m glad to hear that.”
Perhaps because of this, Team Delta including Cha Uihyeon had to worry whether Yeo Dowoon would really go completely crazy. It was to the point where they even wondered if this was really the Yeo Dowoon they knew.
It must have been quite bad, since Ko Ijae had already blocked the medium around him and wasn’t even listening to the verbal battle between the two. It was an unavoidable decision as he became increasingly anxious from the murderous battle of wills.
Wasn’t the fact that Yeo Dowoon had been completely absorbed in Cha Haseong for a whole five years already publicly spread gossip? Watching this situation where he was suddenly sharpening his blade, Ko Ijae felt like Yeo Dowoon would come find him even tomorrow and grab him by the collar asking why he didn’t stop him.
So he had firmly shut his eyelids to completely block any elements he could be held accountable for.
“…….”
While maintaining a composed attitude, Cha Haseong was inwardly dumbfounded by Yeo Dowoon’s sudden change.
Then suddenly, the scenes from when they had argued not long ago, when Yeo Dowoon had poured out words of gratitude that were no different from a farewell, began occupying one side of his consciousness.
At the time, he thought he was just being stubborn, but it seemed those were words spoken with sincerity.
The moment he realized that, Cha Haseong felt irritation surge up. His hands and feet felt hot.
……Now, why? After throwing away everything to be thrown away, after giving up everything to be given up, you’re really going to end it now? You, me?
Cha Haseong hid his palm under the table and quickly clenched his fist. His fingers were convulsing as always. To the point where he had to press down with all his strength endlessly, perhaps because it wouldn’t settle down easily.
Cha Haseong’s complexion turned pale as lead from the detestable phantom pain. His already snow-white skin was now covered with a color as white as drawing paper.
Yeo Dowoon watched him as if he felt sorry and promised with good intentions.
“……Relax. I won’t touch you.”
It was a statement uttered because the opponent, who looked endlessly pitiful in his eyes, was so stiff and frozen all over.
But thanks to that kindness, Cha Haseong could feel his position even more. Right, that’s how it was. He was only in this much of a position.
He intensely felt powerlessness, futility, and disappointment in himself.
He had sworn to engrave in his heart the fact that the relationship between Esper and guide could never become evenly balanced scales, yet he had become deluded.
‘Please be the superior party. Being observant, catering, and providing hospitality….’
‘…….’
‘I’ll take care of all of it.’
To the point where vanity would sometimes arise because it felt like Yeo Dowoon was really treating him as an equal person.
However, his situation was that if he told him to shut up, he had to stay crumpled without making a sound, and only when he threw out a word as if doing a favor could he finally feel relieved.
So Yeo Dowoon’s request to be the superior party that he tediously brought up was all bullshit.
No matter how much he wore a mask pretending to cater to him, he was also an unavoidable Esper. A tribe born arrogant and haughty, with nothing to envy.
So Cha Haseong was seized by futility.
Just as he could never be the superior party even if he died and woke up, the fact that he also could never stand in the inferior party’s position even if he died and woke up poured cold water on his stubborn head.
He felt it even more keenly at times like now.
The immutable truth that while Yeo Dowoon could pretend to be the inferior party and appeal to him with compassion and affection as he wished, he himself could never put on such airs toward him.
He could only voice opinions and have choices when Yeo Dowoon voluntarily imitated being in the inferior position. Only when he cherished him. Only when he treated him as a doll worth looking at.
Therefore, the rights given to him weren’t real rights. They were merely illusions that Yeo Dowoon permitted and created.
When Cha Haseong smiled bitterly as if revealing self-deprecation, Yeo Dowoon drowsily opened his eyes and glanced at him. The soot on his beautiful face aroused concern.
But he couldn’t belatedly care about his mood now, could he? Perhaps this was a moment when he needed to be even more resolute. If he showed even a slightly soft side, he would inevitably end up sending him into the operation.
‘……What can I do. This is the best way.’
It was when Yeo Dowoon deliberately maintained an indifferent attitude as if he wouldn’t consider Cha Haseong.
With a rattling sound of a chair being pushed, Kwon Jeonghoo stood up. Placing the ballpoint pen he was holding on the table with a thud, he scolded his team members with a face containing the hardships of an office worker.
“How is it that not a single bastard tries to stop anyone, not a single one. These guys have all aged for nothing, really.”
Whenever Yeo Dowoon acted wildly like an indiscriminate donkey, everyone just nervously read the room like frightened mice.
That was probably behavior stemming from a wish not to become a thorn in Yeo Dowoon’s side, but regardless of the reason, from Kwon Jeonghoo’s perspective, it couldn’t help but feel unsatisfactory.
He had been quietly watching, thinking at least one bastard would try to dissuade him, but they were all hopeless.
“Today’s meeting ends here, and everyone go back to the partnership training ground and run routines.”
It’s my fault for believing and waiting.
Kwon Jeonghoo, lamenting inwardly, looked at Cha Uihyeon with disappointed eyes.
Even the person he had marked as the next team leader was shuddering at dealing with Yeo Dowoon, so he had absolutely no idea what to do about this.
In fact, because he had stayed up for days preparing for the operation, his mental rotation had also slowed down considerably. Eventually, he shuffled over and stood with his shoe next to Yeo Dowoon.
“You follow me.”
The process of placing his arm on Yeo Dowoon’s shoulder and speaking looked very natural. After putting his arm around his shoulders, he even pulled him close, but Yeo Dowoon didn’t find his touch bothersome.
He just asked in a low voice.
“Did you change your mind?”
“…….”
“The hopeless guide joint operation. I was wondering if the captain also firmed up your mind to not deal with it.”
Then Kwon Jeonghoo let out a chuckle.
Yeo Dowoon felt strangely disrespected and scrunched up his face. Kwon Jeonghoo, who had tickled Yeo Dowoon’s bridge of his nose, tilted his head near his plump earlobe and whispered.
“Whether I do or not, what’s it to you? You have no intention of going on the operation anyway.”
“I intend to go without guides.”
“Hey, you mean without Cha Haseong, not without guides?”
“……I feel like I’m saying this for the hundredth time, but absolutely not. It’s because the operation plan to try something with guides is so sloppy.”
“Then stop talking and just follow me.”
“Why? Are you going to take me somewhere and beat me up? Give up. I still can’t agree to the operation anyway.”
Despite the voice exerting effort and being sarcastic, Kwon Jeonghoo responded affectionately.
“Let’s talk about the operation later, today I just want to be alone with you for the first time in a while.”
“…….”
“Hyung will buy you beef. Let’s go without complaining.”
As expected, spitting out his sweet true feelings was a direct hit for shutting Yeo Dowoon’s mouth. Smiling satisfactorily, Kwon Jeonghoo led the dumbfounded-looking Yeo Dowoon and left the conference room.
Perhaps because there wasn’t much height difference, the two people’s lips maintained a precarious distance as if they would collide at any moment.
Yoon Minoh, thinking that damn Kwon Jeonghoo was suddenly trying to steal Yeo Dowoon away, momentarily twitched his lips and buttocks as if to block them, but Ko Ijae and Cha Uihyeon used their abilities to stop him.
First, Ko Ijae cut off the medium around Yoon Minoh to prevent his voice from traveling, and Cha Uihyeon used gravity to firmly bind his arms and legs that were making a commotion.
Damn it, these senile bastards!
Yoon Minoh mouthed silent curses, but Ko Ijae merely focused on his task. In the glances exchanged between him and Cha Uihyeon in between, sympathy and trust for each other richly emanated.
‘You trust me, right Ijae?’
‘Yes, I trust you. You trust me too, hyung?’
‘I always trust you. We’re a community of shared fate.’
