He decided to steel his resolve. Not to hurt Cha Haseong by being blinded by physical heat. There was one more obstacle preventing him from following his instincts.
It was even because he himself was clumsy with relationships with men. Actually, rather than clumsy, he was ignorant.
…I’d have to sleep with a man to know.
So it seemed that unavoidable differences arising from the physical characteristics of men and women would be lurking everywhere if he tried to handle Cha Haseong as he knew, as he had done before.
Additionally, he didn’t want to see Cha Haseong suffer from pain he was experiencing for the first time.
Thinking of him shuddering saying it hurt, Yeo Dowoon felt it might be better to live as an asexual person instead.
“Dowoon-ssi, may I borrow the bathrobe here?”
It was around the time when various high-level imaginations were swelling in size. Creeak, the bathroom door opened and hazy steam leaked out in wisps.
“Going out naked seems like it would have consequences I can’t handle.”
Yeo Dowoon, who had hurriedly lowered his front hair as if to hide his reddened forehead, looked at Cha Haseong’s appearance as if he would devour it. The calves surrounded by moist moisture appeared clearly. A color as white as drawing paper.
Cha Haseong’s thighs were… pious and artistic enough to bring to mind the statues of Greek temples.
“But if it seems better to be naked, tell me.”
In fact, not only his thighs but the structure and lines of all his muscles were delicate and graceful. It was a body that was even sacred, fundamentally different from the bodies of Espers that were only frighteningly hard and bulging.
So Yeo Dowoon wanted to hum a hymn using Cha Haseong’s voice lingering in his ears as a message. He wanted to embrace his body exuding a holy aura tightly and pour out fervent kisses.
“I’ll try taking it half off.”
It must have been a remark Cha Haseong threw out as a joke, but Yeo Dowoon fell silent, unable to withdraw his hungry gaze.
When a beautiful reality filling the limits of his meager imagination was facing him surrounded by sultry smoke, there was no way he could have the leisure to play along with the joke.
Yeo Dowoon answered after leaving a slight gap.
“I think it would be better if you kept it wrapped.”
If he faced Cha Haseong opening the bathrobe with his own hands on the bed, he didn’t know what shameless acts he might commit to frighten him.
He could just chase him out before trouble arose, but there were many points that made him reluctant to do so in various ways.
For Yeo Dowoon, this moment of breathing the same air in one space with him was too overwhelming and valuable. Cha Haseong, who had been working his jaw, answered calmly.
“I’ll do that. Thanks for the advice.”
He walked to the edge of the bed and sat down, looking up at Yeo Dowoon who was still waiting awkwardly in the direction of the doorway. The warm lighting installed right above the mattress momentarily scattered.
“Are you planning to keep standing there, Dowoon-ssi?”
Yeo Dowoon felt that his sitting posture was extremely obscene. And obscenity and art were elements with infinite magical power that could bewitch people and draw them in.
Simply put, it was sensual. Sensual and lewd.
Both his healthy thighs spread with extra space, and the diagonal angle with his upper body leaning back while lightly touching the mattress with one hand.
If he approached closer, it was certain it would become a posture tilted as if lying down. He would even completely attach his elbows and lift his head higher.
If he wanted to knock him down, by grabbing and pressing his shoulders…
“What if I fall asleep at this rate?”
A desire to conquer arose, wanting to chew on his pure white skin and engrave his traces.
Unbelievably, his canines tickled like a beast grinding its teeth. If he embedded his teeth along his neckline, he would soon furrow his brow imperceptibly and let out a moan small enough not to be heard.
Yeo Dowoon bit the flesh inside his mouth deeply and felt the fishy scent of blood. Lust precariously heated his body.
While walking as slowly as possible with his soles pressed to the ground, a meticulous voice whispered.
“I’ll keep my eyes closed.”
It was the moment Yeo Dowoon’s extremely thin patience was torn in all directions.
“Kiss me as much as you desire.”
***
Yeo Dowoon positioned himself between his two thighs without hastily climbing onto the mattress, as if to fulfill his greed to put each piece of his flesh in his mouth and roll it around.
The touch that grabbed and spread his folded legs wider looked particularly hungry.
The hand gripping his knees repeatedly restrained Cha Haseong with rough grip strength. Fingers that settled on the concave kneecaps sharply raised their nails. Faint scratches remained on the soft skin.
“Ah…”
Cha Haseong let out a faint moan as his skin was crushed roughly.
Yeo Dowoon actually wanted to chew and devour his skin eagerly. But he was only suppressing it because he didn’t want to hurt him. His gaze full of pleasure followed Cha Haseong’s movements.
Cha Haseong felt his palms becoming wet with cold sweat before he knew it. Watching the Esper before him get excited, instinctive fear chilled his spine coldly.
“…May I do more?”
Yeo Dowoon, who had been rubbing his knee area unhurriedly, confirmed his intentions again.
It was a tone that sounded quite innocent, as if giving him a chance to push him away.
However, weren’t Espers vile and mean humans from birth?
They didn’t know how to back down from the start. No. They didn’t even think to learn. It was a truth and absolute proposition that Cha Haseong had learned through experience.
“If you don’t like it, I’ll stop.”
Espers only had the greed to crush Guides beneath them constantly and extort their bodies. Not satisfied with even that, they treated them like escorts at any time and distinguished superiority.
How much more so when they were busy spouting rotten words while boasting arrogant noses even toward S-class Guides?
So to Cha Haseong, the research team at the facility and they felt like no different bastards. No matter how much Yeo Dowoon wore a mask pretending to be polite, that sense of déjà vu didn’t think of leaving.
“…You’ll stop?”
Moreover, Cha Haseong was struggling even with himself due to the unusual energy creeping up stealthily. His fingers tingled.
He bit his lips tightly and endured the phantom pain coming from each joint, asking quietly.
“If I tell you to stop…, you’ll stop?”
It felt like a swift warm wind was blowing toward his solar plexus. Cha Haseong was seized by an aching whose cause was hard to pinpoint. He didn’t know why his chest throbbed so much.
“If I don’t like it…, you’ll stop?”
It was a tone of disbelief. Cha Haseong endlessly repeated only the same question. His voice had clearly sunk. The light brown irises that shook without finding their bearings were pitiful.
Cha Haseong was confused because he couldn’t guess the reason why he was wavering. He was scared and empty. Like a lost child, he constantly experienced anxiety.
It was clear he had lost something, but it was even dismal because it was too distant to assess that existence.
For a moment, Yeo Dowoon laughed painfully as if choked up. He confessed with a brief answer.
“I should do so at least now.”
The heat that had stimulated his lower abdomen quickly lowered its temperature as if he had rubbed himself with cold water. Cha Haseong blinked his eyes, not knowing the reason.
Yeo Dowoon really liked his eyelashes that were packed tightly. The way they fluffy turned over each time his eyelids opened burned one’s heart.
“I won’t do what Guide-nim dislikes.”
The declaring voice contained both strength and will throughout. Yeo Dowoon hid behind the following silence and gathered his past. He forcibly pressed down and swallowed the resentful memories returned from Kwon Jeonghoo.
Since Cha Haseong had directly ordered him to keep his mouth shut and live, he couldn’t pour out his emotions to him any more than this. Perhaps because of this, Yeo Dowoon naturally let out a sigh.
He fell into deep reflection, wondering what difference there was between himself and a dog in heat.
He emphasized once more as if to reassure him.
“I absolutely won’t do it.”
“…”
“Even if I die…”
Cha Haseong quietly watched the scene of him rubbing his face against his thigh like a dejected puppy. Yeo Dowoon, whose pupils had loosened and had been tormenting his skin, was now stroking the marks left on his knees.
“What I said about being the subordinate was sincere. Please think everything is all my fault.”
Ticklish gestures. Eyes full of love.
“Whatever it is, it’s all my fault…, so Guide-nim can, can act even more like the employer.”
Cha Haseong encountered a satisfaction he couldn’t acknowledge.
The top-class Esper called the number one contributor to the Delta Project was kneeling below him with lips pressed together. He was constantly begging and pleading. While putting down his pride on the ground like that.
He knew it was an irrational impulse, but irritation arose to an uncontrollable extent.
“…Dowoon-ssi is really blind toward me. Anyone who saw would think you owed me a grudge from a past life.”
