“I like you.”
“What?”
“I like you.”
Inhan became confused by Yuho’s sudden confession.
You let go of my hand so coldly and left. Inhan couldn’t believe Yuho’s confession that came out like an excuse.
“At first I hated you, and then I felt sorry. I felt sorry for lying to you, and I felt so sorry for having these feelings yet acting like nothing was wrong while receiving your affection and pretending to be a close hyung. And then after that, it was so hard. I thought I’d give up quickly but it wasn’t working out. You kept falling in love and breaking up and moving forward, but I was stuck in place, so it was so hard.”
The words Yuho spoke were more like a confession of guilt than a confession of love toward Inhan.
It was like a confession at church, and also like a letter of reflection, or perhaps a letter of excuses.
If you traced the cause and effect, Inhan being good to him came first, then Yuho getting confused and starting his one-sided love came second, and pushing him away because it was hard came last. Listing it out made it even clearer.
The conclusion was that he wanted to quit because it was hard. Love, the group, staying by his side. He was saying he wanted to quit everything.
Inhan was so angry he couldn’t bear it.
“So you wanted revenge? Because it felt unfair to be the only one suffering?”
“I guess so. I guess I did. I’m sorry. I should have been the only one suffering, but I made you suffer too. So, Inhan. Don’t ruin your life because of someone like me. I’m the bad one, so at least don’t let yourself get hurt.”
Yuho’s guilt-ridden confession seemed like nothing more than a means to clean up the situation.
As if to prove that, Yuho was demanding that Inhan return to where he was. Even though he had no intention of going there together, he was pushing Inhan’s back telling him to go alone.
“Inhan. Let’s go back. Okay? You said you’d do what I want. If you keep missing schedules like this, it’ll really become a big problem. Everything you’ve worked so hard to build will crumble. Please. Inhan.”
“After deceiving someone like this.”
“That’s why. You don’t need to ruin your life because of someone like me.”
Until the very last moment, Yuho seemed to have no intention of going together with Inhan.
That fact made Inhan the saddest.
“That’s disgusting.”
“…I know.”
“It’s like shit.”
“I’m sorry.”
“And you’re even shameless about it.”
Inhan couldn’t accept Yuho’s choice to abandon him twice.
Why didn’t he tell me? I thought there were no secrets between hyung and me.
If hyung had told me, I would have done my best to make a choice that wouldn’t make him sad.
Even if that meant abandoning me, I would have done it.
“Fine. I’ll do everything you say, hyung.”
“Okay. Thank you. …Thank you, Inhan.”
“How is it? Are you happy now that things are going the way you want?”
“Yes. I’m happy.”
“What exactly was I to you, hyung?”
“Just. A romantic partner?”
He had never wished for love. Inhan knew well that behind the sweetness of love, there was always a bitter parting hidden.
As if to prove that fact, even Yuho was abandoning Inhan because he said he liked him.
Inhan just wanted to stay by Yuho’s side for a long time. That was all.
“This is really disgusting.”
But Yuho was saying even that wasn’t possible. That was the result of a love he had never even dared to hope for. Inhan thought that reality was so disgusting.
Disgustingly, his heart ached.
* * *
“What’s wrong with him?”
That was the first thing Unseong said when he found Inhan standing in front of his entrance. His face was so puffy from what rough ordeal he’d been through that he looked terrible.
“I thought you were faking sick? You look like you’re really sick somewhere.”
“He’s pissed that I reported to the company. So you calm him down and send him back.”
Domyeong spoke to Unseong with a shameless face.
The one who caused trouble was Jung Inhan, and the one who pissed him off was Seo Domyeong, so why did he have to be the one to calm him down and send him back?
Unseong was dumbfounded and questioned Domyeong.
“Did you make him cry?”
“I think I have some responsibility.”
“But why me?”
“He says he doesn’t want me.”
“I don’t want to either.”
“We can’t just let him loose outside and have articles written about him. This kid is only twenty-two.”
Seo Domyeong’s argument wasn’t logical at all, but it was enough to persuade Unseong.
Inhan, who was young yet seemed to carry all the worries of the world, was someone who occasionally caught Unseong’s eye.
“Then I’m trusting you with this.”
Seo Domyeong exited after dumping Inhan on him. Unseong let out a deep sigh and spoke to Inhan.
“I’m not exactly thrilled to see you coming here after causing trouble.”
“The CEO says we should disband. That our group has no prospects.”
“What should I give you for a snack? Should I heat up some pizza?”
At Inhan’s single sentence, Unseong quickly opened the front door wide. Inhan, whose expression looked like he might cry any moment, entered Unseong’s house and naturally headed to the living room.
“So? What happened?”
Unseong asked while handing a can of beer to Inhan who was sitting on the living room sofa. He also placed the frozen pizza he’d quickly heated up in front of Inhan.
“I don’t know. I just walked out.”
Inhan said while gulping down the can of beer. Unseong expressed sympathy at Inhan’s face that looked deeply troubled. Right. There’s nothing as hard as teamwork. Unseong, who had experienced all kinds of heartache until his band that started as a 5-member group 8 years ago was reduced to 3 members, fully empathized with Inhan’s feelings.
“Why? Instead of confronting it head-on.”
“There are many problems that can’t be solved by confronting them.”
“But running away from home isn’t a choice that suits you.”
Unseong looked at Inhan with suspicious eyes. Inhan’s face showed complicated feelings. Having finished reading the atmosphere, Unseong decided to refrain from asking any more questions.
“Unseong-hyung.”
“Yeah. What? Inhan.”
Inhan, who had been gulping down can after can of beer looking half-dead, finally opened his mouth after thirty minutes. Unseong welcomed it and waited for Inhan’s next question.
“Have you ever liked a guy?”
“What?”
“Or have you ever been confessed to by a guy?”
Unseong was momentarily taken aback by Inhan’s question but soon regained his composure. And he gave an unfiltered answer.
“I’ve slept with a guy before.”
Unseong’s answer, spoken as if it were nothing, actually shocked Inhan more.
Is this a hidden camera? His mind was hazy from the consecutive outings he was hearing about. He’d lived without even knowing if gay people existed, and now two of his closest hyungs were gay. It was shock after shock.
“For reference, you’re not my type.”
“I didn’t ask.”
Inhan said with a disgusted look at Unseong’s TMI that he didn’t particularly want to know. Then he asked Unseong with a serious expression.
“Is that kind of thing usually common?”
“How would I know? I’m not interested in other people.”
“So you’ve only slept with them? Never liked them?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“Because the person I wanted to like wouldn’t sleep with me? No. Because when I tried to like them, they wouldn’t sleep with me.”
“You’re quite the trash too, hyung.”
Inhan said to Unseong with disgust. Of course, it didn’t have much impact on Unseong, who had a strong mentality.
But when you’re attacked, it’s only right to give back. Unseong threw a question at Inhan that he’d been holding back the whole time.
“Why? Because you like Yuho-hyung too much?”
Inhan almost spit out the beer he was drinking. Setting aside the members, he couldn’t understand why even the hyungs he knew privately kept bringing up Yuho-hyung at every turn.
“Why are you suddenly talking about Yuho-hyung? I didn’t say anything.”
“The reason you’d ask such a question is obvious. Because you like Yuho-hyung so much you could die. But he won’t play with you again.”
“That’s not it.”
“If not? Did Yuho-hyung say he likes you?”
Inhan was at a loss for words at Unseong’s following words. How does Unseong-hyung know that?
He really thought he was being pranked on a hidden camera.
But he couldn’t just openly confide in Unseong.
“No.”
“If Yuho says he likes you, then you could just date and there’d be no problem, so is this because you like him? Because there’s absolutely no hope?”
“Why do you think there’s no hope?”
Inhan asked Unseong who was speaking with such certainty. Unseong answered Inhan as if it were obvious.
“If he didn’t fall for you even after you tried so hard to seduce him with everything you had, then there’s no answer. Give up.”
“I never seduced him.”
“In professional terms, that’s called flirting.”
“I never did that. I just…”
“You were good to him as a member?”
“…It wasn’t just as a member that I was good to him.”
“What a philanthropist we have here.”
Unseong said while sarcastically mocking Inhan. Inhan, feeling emotional, asked Unseong.
“You are comforting me right now, right hyung?”
Oops. I was supposed to be comforting this kid. Unseong realized and changed his attitude.
“Of course. I’m definitely comforting you.”
“It feels like you’re being sarcastic.”
“Not at all. Should I bring our Inhan more snacks?”
“I’m fine.”
Inhan became even more sullen and made a gloomy face. Meeting the hyungs was all good except for them dropping these truth bombs. Maybe because they were all older, they had exceptional talent for hitting people with words.
“Then let me ask just in case.”
“Ask what?”
“Would it be okay if I dated Yuho?”
They also displayed unnecessary talent in toying with people.
At Unseong’s suddenly thrown question, Inhan instantly showed an uncomfortable expression. Noticing that momentary change, Unseong asked Inhan again.
“Hmm? What do you think? About me and Yuho dating?”
“Why would you date Yuho-hyung? Don’t say things like that even as a joke.”
“Why? If Yuho says he likes me, we could meet.”
Unseong spoke slyly and provoked Inhan once more. Inhan’s expression was gradually hardening.
“Right. That’s what I should do. I’ll seduce Yuho with this handsome face of mine and make it so you don’t have to worry about useless things. Wouldn’t that be good for you too?”
“Stop joking around, hyung.”
Inhan’s expression was completely distorted. Seeing the kid who had never once gotten angry at the hyungs show such an intense reaction made Unseong excited, but he decided to wrap up the joke here.
