“Hup.”
I held my breath. No. My breath was held. I was afraid my breath would touch Kim Haewon’s face. Kim Haewon’s pupils, seen up close, were even more mystical. They were a subtle color as if they could bewitch someone. Beautiful pupils to the point where I couldn’t look away. As if someone had cast a spell, I couldn’t avoid his eyes.
Kim Haewon looked at me quietly, then pressed my chin lightly with his finger. My lower lip, which I’d been biting the whole time, popped out.
“Your face is red.”
“What?”
“Doesn’t that kind of reaction come out during romantic moments?”
“I-I’m just flustered.”
I could feel that my face was red too. With someone’s face right in front of mine, I couldn’t help but be flustered. And it was someone who had confidently confessed he had feelings for me.
I pushed his shoulder away as if telling him to back off, but Kim Haewon grabbed that hand and came closer. It was one step before our lips touched. When I turned my head slightly to the side, Kim Haewon’s lips moved to the same side. I turned my face to the opposite side in embarrassment. Then Kim Haewon approached that side a bit more slowly.
I wanted to avoid him once more, but while turning my head, we got close enough for our lips to touch again. It felt like the fine hairs on our faces would touch. The distance was excessively close, to the point I didn’t know what to do with my gaze.
I’d rather he quickly kiss me and move away, but he just followed me as if our lips would touch or not, making me more nervous. I raised my gaze that I’d kept lowered trying to avoid him. Kim Haewon was looking straight at me.
As soon as our gazes met directly, Kim Haewon briefly kissed me and pulled away. Something soft and squishy definitely touched my lips. There was no chance to avoid it. Even as Kim Haewon’s face moved away, I remained frozen in that spot.
“My verification is complete.”
“…”
“Now it’s Park Garam Guide’s turn.”
“No, you found a reason to like me from one peck?”
“I knew before doing it.”
“What is it?”
“If you want to know my answer, Park Garam Guide should also find the answer.”
“How can that be!”
“It’s right here.”
Kim Haewon spoke without batting an eye and sat in his seat. Not only was it absurd that I was suddenly kissed, but the expression that said he’d found an answer and looked somewhat relieved was even more absurd.
I touched my lips for no reason. It didn’t feel bad. Only the sensation that it was just squishy and soft remained. I remember feeling very bad when I was secretly kissed at school, but had I become indifferent because I’d gotten older?
While thinking quietly, I quickly lowered my hand lest Kim Haewon see. Then I also sat in my seat. Of course, my body was completely turned toward the window. Kim Haewon seemed not to care at all how I sat.
I didn’t like that attitude of being clear himself after making me completely confused. I said while lying on my side.
“So Kim Haewon Esper now likes me?”
“Yes.”
“How do you decide so quickly in one breath?”
I turned my body to look at Kim Haewon and asked. Then he looked at me and continued.
“Do I look like such an impulsive person in Park Garam Guide’s eyes?”
“No.”
“Then why do you ask when you know?”
Kim Haewon asked as if why would I do such an inefficient thing. Does this bastard really like me? I was doubtful. I continued while wriggling my eyebrows.
“I’m asking because I don’t understand. Ah! Don’t steal kisses like this from now on.”
“Can I do it if I tell you?”
“Don’t do it even if you tell me.”
“Why not?”
At Kim Haewon’s words, I got angry.
“Because you can’t! Why would we kiss when we’re not even lovers?”
“Isn’t it Park Garam Guide who’s conservative, not me?”
It was a counterattack. Kim Haewon even had a slight smile leisurely placed on his face. I bit my lips tightly. Then Kim Haewon reached out and pressed my chin again.
“That’s not a very good habit.”
“Mind your own business!”
Like an adolescent child slamming a door, I smacked his hand away. I thought I might have hit too hard, but I stubbornly didn’t look back. He really got my hopes up and let them down.
“You have a habit of biting too hard and for too long.”
“I don’t.”
“You do.”
Kim Haewon didn’t concede even one word. I was about to make some excuse but bit my lips tightly. I couldn’t tell when he had observed me in such detail.
It felt strange that he had been carefully watching my habits when he acted like he had no interest and only worked.
‘Strange? Why don’t I feel bad about it?’
There was no feeling that it was bad. When our lips met, when he said he liked me. Could it be that I like him too? Suddenly goosebumps rose on my arms. There was no reason for me to come to like him.
Kim Haewon was handsome, had strong abilities, had a lot of money, and had various advantages, but those things didn’t win my favor. Because there was the strongest dislike point of “no manners.”
As soon as that thought entered my head, I blurted out into the air.
“I don’t like Kim Haewon Esper’s personality.”
“That’s possible.”
Kim Haewon answered as if he’d expected it. I sat up in surprise. During the trip to San Francisco, it seemed my pupils had no time to get smaller.
“You accept it right away?”
“It means I agree that you might not have liked my attitude until now.”
“Why, why do you say it like that?”
“Right now, isn’t the one with regrets my side?”
Kim Haewon said while looking at me. It was a somehow leisurely-sounding tone. He looked relieved.
“You look so relaxed, like you’re relieved? After making me this confused?”
“If you’re confused, it means there’s a possibility.”
“H-how does it get interpreted that way?”
“I never thought there was no chance from the beginning.”
“What confidence is that?”
Kim Haewon smiled while looking at me, then continued.
“It’s intuition.”
He was copying the joke I’d made before. I wanted to say I didn’t know he could do such things. When I made an expression of disbelief, Kim Haewon laughed with a “pfft” sound and turned his head.
“Kim Haewon Esper, I didn’t know you could make that kind of expression.”
“There’s nothing I can’t do.”
Kim Haewon seemed refreshed as if his worries had been resolved, but I wasn’t. When I opened my eyes triangularly and looked at him, Kim Haewon laughed with a “pfft” and continued.
“Still, it was Park Garam Guide who told me it was okay.”
“When did I?”
“You always did.”
“I did?”
“Yes.”
Kim Haewon was firm. As if it was really the truth. I never did that. I swear I never gave such advice, and I never said anything with such nuance. I carefully traced my memory and continued.
“I really have a good memory. But I never…”
“There’s also something I came to like because of that.”
“…”
“I told you one thing, so stop grumbling. I’ll tell you the rest when Park Garam Guide finds the answer.”
Kim Haewon drew a line as if he wouldn’t accept any rebuttal. He was willful. I continued in a small voice.
“If I can’t find the answer, you mean I’ll never know?”
“Would you need to know?”
“What kind of talk is that again? After making someone so curious.”
“If you’re curious, try changing your direction of thinking.”
Kim Haewon showed a will to definitely hear a ‘YES’ answer from me. Even if I thought hard and answered no, it seemed he wouldn’t give up. Even that aspect was so like him.
Traditionally, isn’t a confession supposed to be with tears welling up, not knowing what to do with one’s own heart? The desperate scene in dramas saying “I love you, please accept my heart” didn’t exist in reality.
I kept wiping my lips, thinking about the kiss that happened because I was pushed by Kim Haewon. The sensation on my lips became clearer the more I wiped. The feeling of someone else’s skin touching wasn’t as bad as I thought, but it wasn’t good either.
It was too short to properly judge. Rather than that, the scuffle I had with him before the kiss was more vivid. My heart pounded more at that time. When our lips almost touched but missed. I was more nervous then than during the actual kiss.
Actually, if he pushed with his strength, it wouldn’t have ended with just a kiss. He could have done more than that, and even Management Bureau people might not have been able to stop him. Because he had that much power and authority.
But he didn’t do that. Rather than being coercive, he told me his feelings and gave me a choice.
What if there hadn’t been that phone call with Nam Ihyeon today? Then would he not have confessed his feelings to me? No. It wouldn’t have been that way. Whenever it was, he would have found the answer himself and told me.
That he likes me. That he’s come to like me.
Then what’s the reason?
The reason why even C-class guide Park Garam could be loved.
No matter how I thought about it, if I were Kim Haewon, it was a decision I wouldn’t make. I couldn’t erase my doubts while looking at him. Kim Haewon was now working on his tablet PC without caring whether I looked at him or not.
A straight and high nose and thin lips. Sharp eyes and blue pupils. I slowly examined Kim Haewon’s face. The more I looked, the more I thought he was handsome.
With a face like this, why would he like someone ordinary like me? Even removing Kim Haewon’s SS-class ability, even removing his enormous wealth from the equation, I couldn’t understand. I propped my chin and let out a small sigh while looking at him. He glanced at me, then smiled slightly.
‘Why does he keep smiling and making a fuss? It’s annoying.’
I turned my head away sharply. Just from seeing him smile, it felt like heat rose to my face. Kim Haewon likes me. That Kim Haewon. I pressed my cheek against the cold window. The heat cooled quickly, but my head was more dizzy.
