Chapter 30
In an instant, everything snapped back to normal.
“I’ll tell Chief Kim to schedule your training soon.”
“…Thank you.”
I turned away and left the living room. My body felt heavy, like a waterlogged sponge, as I dragged myself up the stairs. A familiar silhouette caught my eye. I slowly looked at Yu Hyunjae—his neatly combed hair, the glint in his eyes beneath it, the bridge of his nose, his lips, his chin, and the body that followed. Standing upright and looking down at me, Yu Hyunjae felt strangely foreign, as if he had become someone else entirely.
“I waited for you.”
Hyunjae spoke. I blinked once and asked,
“Why?”
I expected an immediate answer, but Hyunjae hesitated slightly.
“…Because we didn’t finish talking.”
“Okay.”
I nodded obediently and stood still. It was a strange standoff. I couldn’t deny that I wasn’t pleased by the subtle change in how Hyunjae had been treating me since the Combat Division tour.
“Where… did you go?”
After a long pause, that was the question he asked. I couldn’t tell him I’d met Han Jaemin, so I tried to brush it off vaguely.
“Someone I know.”
“I see.”
“…Why?”
“It was a meaningless question.”
“That’s unusual. You don’t usually ask me things like that.”
Hyunjae’s face, which had been answering methodically, now looked even more confused. I stopped asking further questions. I knew this phenomenon. I remembered the days when Hyunjae had tried to recall me in front of the music room, when he had walked along the beach, determined not to forget. And I knew that even if he managed to dig up those memories, I already knew how our story would end.
Sometimes, predictable endings don’t bring resignation—they bring defiance. Even after nine lives, I knew I could never find the value of “happiness” in any scenario, yet I had always strived for something rather than giving up. Maybe Hyunjae was in that state now. Of course, it was a courage I no longer had.
“You don’t know either, do you?”
……
“I don’t even know who I am.”
……
“And we don’t need to know every little thing about each other, do we?”
I gave a self-deprecating smile. Hyunjae stared at me intently, his gaze persistent and slightly emotional, as if trying to figure me out.
“You know something.”
“No.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
This time, I gave an uncertain answer and avoided Hyunjae’s eyes. I slowly climbed the stairs and passed him. Just as I was about to step into the second-floor living room, a firm hand grabbed my shoulder.
“You’re lying.”
“I’m not.”
“You know.”
“I don’t.”
“There’s something. Definitely.”
Hyunjae said it with a confident expression. I didn’t know if he was remembering something, or if he had figured something out, or if he was just recklessly throwing words into the void.
“There’s nothing.”
That’s why I was afraid. Because I thought of him as just a character in a novel, Hyunjae always created variables. In this world where everything moved as scripted, he always made me think—even knowing it would fail—that he might be the only one who could save me. That’s why I was afraid.
“Not yet.”
Hyunjae gripped my shoulder harder and said,
“Just… wait a little longer. Just a little more.”
Hyunjae lowered his head, clenching his teeth. His earlier confidence seemed to have vanished, replaced by a face full of confusion again. He looked like someone desperately trying to suppress a thought or identity that kept forcing its way out.
“Don’t do that.”
I grabbed Hyunjae’s hand. Surprisingly, it fell away from my body easily, despite how tightly he’d been holding on.
“Don’t make it painful.”
I spoke sincerely.
“Don’t try so hard.”
……
“Just do what you’ve always done.”
In the end, I left Hyunjae behind and went into my room. Just before closing the door, I met eyes with Hyunjae, who was looking at me with an unreadable expression.
***
Kim Guhyeon seemed a little surprised. He seemed curious whether my decision to train under him was truly voluntary.
“Technically, learning from your father would be best, but…”
I said casually.
“It’s not common for a Hunter to switch to being a Shielder like my father, right?”
“Well, no.”
“Even if he opposes it, I’m already on that path.”
“I heard you’ve been training as a Shielder all along,”
He looked genuinely curious, but I refrained from elaborating. Kim Guhyeon was my father’s confidant, after all. I planned to learn combat techniques from him while slowly digging into his past. What I told Han Jaemin was that I wanted to “cut off my father’s right-hand man,” but in truth, I wanted to find out why he had killed me.
I slowly looked around the place I was standing in. The basement of the Combat Division had a training ground for Rankers, primarily used by members of the state-sanctioned Haedam Guild.
The concept of Training Zone 1 was “urban.” The props were so well-made that you had to look closely to tell they were fake. I fiddled with the body of a large traffic light, roughly memorizing the positions of the props. Kim Guhyeon took something out of his case and handed it to me.
“This is a blade with no edge at all.”
He ran his fingers along the blade. Indeed, the longsword was more like a blunt piece of metal.
“It only functions when you infuse it with sword energy.”
“Sword energy is just the materialization of mana.”
Kim Guhyeon nodded at my textbook answer. After a few hours of practice, I managed to roughly manifest sword energy. Infusing sword energy itself wasn’t difficult for someone with mana, but being able to do it in just a few hours was clearly a sign of great talent.
“You really are talented.”
“It’s just a sword.”
Sword energy was one of the most basic skills a Hunter needed, but the ability to control its intensity depended entirely on the Hunter’s own aptitude. Yu Dohyun had been able to kill A-rank monsters in a single strike—truly a genius.
“I’ll release a practice monster now.”
I readjusted my grip on the sword. I’d lived many lives, but this was the first time I’d properly trained as a Hunter. In most of my lives, I’d been a Shielder, and in some cases, I’d avoided using my abilities altogether. Feeling a slight sweat on my palms, I focused on the approaching fake monster.
“You need to dodge.”
I slammed the sword infused with sword energy into the ground and used the rebound to jump wide. The practice monster was slow, but it clearly recognized its target. Though its appearance wasn’t as grotesque as the A-rank monsters I’d seen in my dreams, it was still pretty disgusting. Frowning, I leaped behind the monster again and drove the sword into its body. The blade sank in about halfway before stopping.
Kim Guhyeon froze the monster’s movements.
“For a first attempt, you did really well. You’ve got great reflexes.”
“But in a real fight…”
“You’d be dead.”
I nodded. Kim Guhyeon examined the monster’s torn flesh where the sword had entered.
“Your control of sword energy is lacking, but you still have the habits of a Shielder.”
“What do you mean by ‘Shielder habits’?”
“Putting defense before attack.”
Kim Guhyeon pulled the sword out of the monster and instructed me to step back a little further. The monster moved again. Kim Guhyeon didn’t dodge the monster coming straight at him; instead, he thrust the sword directly into its stomach. A loud alarm sounded inside the training ground, and the monster collapsed.
“Don’t fear what’s in front of you.”
I stared at the fallen monster and nodded. Don’t fear what’s in front of you. Surprisingly, there was a lot I could learn from Kim Guhyeon. For several hours, I received direct training on what I needed to embody as a Hunter. My schedule was tight—I had to demonstrate my abilities as a Hunter before entering high school and taking the second selection test. Yu Hyunjae had already mastered martial arts and was aware of his own abilities.
***
When I left the training ground, it was already dark outside. I gave Kim Guhyeon a brief farewell and walked toward the car that was already waiting.
“Chanhee.”
I turned my head. Kim Guhyeon was looking at me with a proud smile.
“You’ve got talent, so keep at it.”
I silently bowed my head in acknowledgment. But the pretense didn’t last long. I quickly turned away and headed back to the car.
“Fuck…”
Disgusting, despicable bastard. I held back the nausea rising in my throat and opened the back door of the car.
It was horrifying.
