# Chapter 5. What He Left Behind (4)
They say nothing makes a person more flustered than an unexpected change.
Dohyeong had many thoughts as he looked at the surprised Haesung. What was he thinking? He couldn’t say for certain, but he could tell that his words just now were not what Haesung had expected.
“I’m not sure who’s worried about whom here.”
He bit his lip hard as he watched Haesung carefully choosing his words while swallowing.
“This drama hasn’t even begun script reading yet. If photos of the two of you are taken and a drama that hasn’t even started is mentioned, who would be harmed? Kim Dohyeong-ssi, are you such an amateur that you can’t think that far ahead?”
At Haesung’s somewhat sharp voice, Dohyeong flinched and clenched his fist tightly. What he said wasn’t wrong. As he said, no one could know what impact it would have on a drama for which no information had been revealed yet.
For a moment, as he bowed his head unable to say anything, Yuchan brushed off Haesung’s hand and slightly pulled Dohyeong behind him.
“That’s just Jung Haesung-ssi’s speculation. The fact that Dohyeong and I are close is something any decent entertainment reporter would know. I was the only one who maintained contact with him after that incident.”
Dohyeong glanced at Haesung.
His eyebrows were twitching. For unknown reasons, his discomfort was also clearly visible on his face.
It was the same expression he’d had since earlier, when Yuchan introduced himself as Dohyeong’s partner in the office and offered a handshake.
It was strange. Why would he react like that? Even as he watched Haesung’s face flushing red and then blue, the questions kept coming.
But he couldn’t ask. He didn’t want to ask either.
He only hoped that this situation would be resolved quickly.
Whether Yuchan knew or didn’t know Dohyeong’s feelings, he stepped forward and stood close to Haesung. Haesung’s face crumpled even more at his words, delivered in a lowered voice.
“Even if reporters see us and mention Director Na’s drama, it wouldn’t be a bad thing. It would just be framed as ‘Choi Yuchan encouraging Kim Dohyeong who’s preparing for his comeback.’ Isn’t that what image is for?”
“Your words have barbs, Choi Yuchan-ssi.”
“Yes, they do. I’m saying that Jung Haesung-ssi giving advice to Dohyeong would actually be more counterproductive. As I just mentioned, interpretation varies depending on image. You should know that better than anyone.”
He could understand Yuchan’s words to some extent. No matter how much someone gives advice on a public matter, it’s clear it will be seen unfavorably in someone’s eyes.
Like Soyeon, who was particularly aggressive toward Haesung in the office.
Haesung, who had been silently watching the two, slowly inhaled with his hands in his pockets.
“Fine, seeing your confidence, I’ll assume the concerns won’t materialize. But it’s better not to unnecessarily catch the eyes of reporters. There are people who will connect things no matter what.”
But Yuchan didn’t even blink. He just quietly met Haesung’s gaze, which was staring at him as if it would devour him.
“Haesung-ah! The elevator is here!”
Haesung only moved after hearing Seonghyeok’s voice calling from afar. After he entered the elevator, Wootae, who had been greeting him from the front, walked over to the two.
“What’s going on? The atmosphere was so tense that I couldn’t possibly interrupt.”
“It’s nothing.”
Yuchan shook his head as he answered. There was no need to add to Wootae’s worries. He was already someone who constantly complained about worrying over Dohyeong.
Just as he was about to speak, suggesting they move after some time, Dohyeong plopped down in his place.
“Dohyeong-ah!”
Wootae crouched next to him and gripped his shoulder tightly. His pale face and slightly trembling body showed just how tense he had been. After taking deep breaths for a while, Dohyeong shook his head and smiled faintly.
“No, I’m okay, hyung. Just… I was just a bit nervous.”
“Are you sure? Your next schedule is a magazine interview, can you go?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I can go.”
Yuchan let out a short sigh as he watched Dohyeong speaking while sweating cold. Then he knelt on one knee to lower his gaze to Dohyeong’s level.
“Dohyeong-ah.”
Dohyeong slowly raised his head at his call and forced a smile. He was always grateful to this person. That’s why he felt he couldn’t lose him.
They say not to make a person your salvation, but he wondered if it was okay to hold onto this friend who had become his salvation. Such a foolish thought even crossed his mind.
“It’s okay.”
It was just one simple phrase, but it welled up again.
His heart fluttered at those words that didn’t chastise him for still foolishly not breaking free from Haesung’s shadow, but instead soothed him, saying it was okay.
“You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s completely understandable. You can become anxious just from exchanging a few words, because you haven’t overcome the trauma. Yes, it’s understandable.”
“…Yuchan-ah.”
“But let’s not worry about Jung Haesung during the script reading. Once we start shooting in earnest, we’ll keep running into him, and we can’t keep reacting like this forever.”
Dohyeong nodded. He was right. There would be many more days when he would face Haesung, and he couldn’t react like this every time.
He took a deep breath while tightly hugging his arm. As if gathering his resolve, he firmed up his chest.
“You are you. And you are doing very well.”
“Thank you.”
“Can you overcome this?”
Dohyeong nodded. He realized once again that just the fact that someone believed in him and supported him could make him stand so proudly.
“Today I just listened calmly, but next time I’ll talk back at least once. Then twice after that, and three times after that. Eventually, I’ll act more confidently. It might be difficult right now, but I’ll overcome it steadily, so watch me.”
He meant it sincerely. He couldn’t guarantee immediate change. But he could confidently affirm his belief that he could escape the past.
Though he spoke calmly, Wootae, standing beside him, closed his mouth at Dohyeong’s voice, which was filled with determination.
Because he also knew how difficult it had been for Dohyeong to come this far.
“Yes, I’ll watch you.”
Wootae and Dohyeong smiled brightly at Yuchan’s response.
A moment later, Yuchan’s manager, who had received the script and future schedules from the office, came out and patted his shoulder.
“I’m going now, see you next time.”
Just as Yuchan, who had risen from his seat, was about to walk away, Dohyeong also jumped up from his seat.
His lips moved as if he was trying to say something, and then he took a deep breath.
“Make sure to watch me, I’ll really overcome this!”
Dohyeong’s following words echoed loudly down the corridor.
The meaning behind his words to watch him was that he wanted to maintain this relationship in the future. Moreover, it was a statement layered with a promise not to disappoint the person who had helped him stay strong.
Yuchan stopped walking and turned around. Then he waved his hand at Dohyeong.
Dohyeong smiled faintly as he watched him disappear around the corner of the corridor.
I can do well. I can overcome this. It felt just like being under a spell.
***
When he went down to the underground parking lot, he found Haesung standing nonchalantly in front of a car, as if waiting for someone. It seemed like he was waiting for Dohyeong. Feeling his insides churning, he stood firmly in place and silently glared at him.
Perhaps sensing his gaze, Haesung, who had been looking at his phone for a while, made eye contact with him. After a long silence, he slowly walked towards Yuchan.
“I waited because I had something to ask. It didn’t seem appropriate to find your contact information separately.”
Yuchan let out a brief sigh at Haesung’s expression and tone, which still showed reluctance.
“Yes, ask away. I’m also not keen on personally contacting Jung Haesung-ssi.”
Haesung smirked at Yuchan’s retort, which didn’t give an inch. He didn’t consider himself a great person, but wasn’t he at least a senior in the industry?
How many people had reacted like this, he wondered, smoothing his hair back as he pondered. After thinking for a while, Haesung asked him with his hands deeply thrust into his pockets.
This question might sound ridiculous, but he really wanted to ask it. It was one of the things he’d thought he should ask.
“Since when have you been close to Dohyeong… I mean, Kim Dohyeong-ssi?”
At that question, Yuchan couldn’t help but laugh. He looked down at the toe of his shoe for a while, then bit his lip.
If both of them weren’t celebrities, if they weren’t in professions that lived off their faces. It wouldn’t have been strange to throw a punch right then. It wouldn’t have been a day or two since he’d met Dohyeong. If he didn’t even know since when Dohyeong had been friends with him.
‘How little did you care?’
His insides boiled again. How deep and wide was the swamp of indifference that Dohyeong had been trapped in? Thinking of him struggling alone there, constantly reaching out, made him feel hollow around his throat.
After wiping his face with one hand and groaning, he raised his head and directly faced Haesung.
“I don’t know whether to be glad that you’re curious now, or to ask why it took you so long to be curious.”
“Just answer what I asked.”
“Ha….”
A derisive laugh escaped. Just answer what was asked, what a convenient and irresponsible thing to say. His insides twisted at the attitude of someone who had no intention of finding out himself but only wanted to hear the answers that came back.
“I don’t want to answer.”
It seems Haesung was equally upset by his words. He furrowed his brow and bowed his head, letting out a short, derisive snort.
The underground parking lot instantly became even cooler. Soon, the pheromones rising from the two men made the basement even more desolate.
Haesung’s heavy oud wood scent and Yuchan’s citrus scent intertwined. Just as the gazes glaring at each other were becoming increasingly fierce, a voice calling for Haesung was heard from behind. It was Seonghyeok, complaining that there was another schedule.
“If you’re really curious, you should find out on your own. Even asking me is telling of your level of indifference.”
He had no words to refute Yuchan’s statement. Haesung looked at him calmly and took a deep breath. His smooth brow wrinkled slightly. But he decided that this wasn’t about wounded pride, but simply because the pheromones were uncomfortable.
He decided to believe it was just because their pheromones weren’t compatible.
“Let me ask one more thing.”
“If it’s about Dohyeong again, I—”
“Do you really think of him only as a friend?”
He was about to say he wouldn’t answer anymore, but his question was somewhat startling. It was a matter he could simply answer ‘yes’ to, but the words wouldn’t easily come out.
It’s true that he thinks of him as a friend, and it’s also true that’s why he cares so much. But why couldn’t he give a positive answer?
“I guess you don’t just think of him as a friend, Choi Yuchan-ssi.”
Yuchan gritted his teeth at Haesung’s provocative question.
“I don’t think it’s something for Jung Haesung-ssi to worry about. Regardless of how I think of Dohyeong, you don’t have the right to interfere.”
That was as good as an answer. He pressed his lips tightly, containing the emotions swirling in his mind. Emotions that he himself had not decided on entangled and made his heart heavy.
Yuchan stared at Haesung’s back as he walked away without a word. This isn’t right, he groaned, wiping his heated face with one hand. Haa, his long sigh scattered throughout the quiet parking lot.
