# Chapter 53
Jiho touched the sensitive spots on Yeomin’s body over his clothes, demanding obsessively.
“Promise you won’t do that again.”
“Haah.”
“Promise me, quickly—”
It was closer to whining than actual threatening.
With Yeomin, Jiho kept wanting to act childish. He, who never cared about making a bad impression on anyone, wanted to appear vulnerable and make a good impression on someone for the first time in his life—and that someone was Yeomin.
Even if the whole world envied him, or pointed fingers at him, or was jealous of him, or cursed him, he just wished Yeomin would pity him. He wanted Yeomin to sympathize with him.
‘Then, you’ll never be able to leave me.’
As long as Yeomin stayed by his side forever, nothing else mattered.
Whether Yeomin’s feelings were love, fear, responsibility, or pity. None of that was important.
“Promise me. If you don’t, I won’t let you go all night.”
“…You won’t let me go even if I promise.”
“You know me so well now? That makes me happy.”
Jiho smiled brightly as he pulled down Yeomin’s loose elastic pants.
Revealing his smooth buttocks. It was a place that always made Jiho lose his mind. A place he wanted to observe and caress all day.
Jiho gently ran his hand between Yeomin’s buttocks.
Yeomin flinched and responded honestly.
“Ugh, if you’re going to do it, hurry up.”
“No. After we finish, you’ll go right to sleep.”
“That’s because you keep going until I pass out!”
“Today I want to savor you slowly.”
Like the last piece of candy in his favorite flavor. He would roll it around in his mouth over and over. Until the sweet taste made his entire mouth raw.
Even if the broken candy cut his tongue and blood seeped out. Jiho was confident he would never spit it out.
“This is the only time you cling to me.”
Begging for more, or asking him to stop, or saying it tickles. Yeomin only responded this honestly in bed, as if he couldn’t bear it. Well, they weren’t actually on a bed today, but still.
Yeomin, relying solely on him, trembling and falling apart. It gave Jiho an intense pleasure that couldn’t be compared to simple physical gratification.
“Take it easy, huh? Would it kill you to let me finish quickly…?”
“I love it when you get desperate like this.”
“…Not desperate, more like going insane.”
“When you cling to me and depend on me. That feeling gives me such intense shivers.”
Jiho slowly rubbed Yeomin’s lower parts as his body heated up helplessly. Deliberately making him desperate, he repeatedly stopped his hand when Yeomin got a little excited, then moved again.
All the while, Jiho never took his eyes off Yeomin for even a second, looking like he wanted to devour him.
He had already violated and consumed Yeomin with his eyes countless times.
No. In his imagination, he had done even worse things. Imagining being with Yeomin forever. Imagining allowing nothing and no one near Yeomin except himself.
If Yeomin knew this, he would be angry. He might run away from here, horrified.
‘That can’t happen. Act lovable, Seol Jiho.’
Jiho nibbled on Yeomin’s ear and whispered.
“I like you so much, hyung…”
Yeomin, half giving up, simply surrendered his body to Jiho and swayed weakly.
Jiho murmured endlessly into Yeomin’s ear like a spell. Hoping it would be engraved in Yeomin’s brain, heart, and entire body.
With all his obsession and this greedy affection.
“I really… hyung…”
Jiho stopped mid-sentence. He hesitated to reveal a certain emotion that was blocking one side of his heart.
I really… hyung,
…really,
Jiho held back the words that came to his mind.
And wordlessly sucked on Yeomin’s wet lips. He conveyed it through the breath mingling between their lips, through saliva, through body heat.
The word “love”—a synonym for obsession, doubt, anxiety, distrust, concern, dependency, greed, desire, wariness, and deception.
* * *
Yeomin went to work at the PC bang after a long time. Of course, Jiho wasn’t very happy about that either.
He seemed to dislike that Yeomin insisted on continuing both Jiwoong’s tutoring and his part-time job at the PC bang.
‘That PC bang must be doing good business.’
‘Well, it’s in front of a neighborhood full of students living alone. There’s an elementary school and university nearby too.’
But no matter how much Jiho clung to him whining, Yeomin couldn’t skip any more shifts.
He’d already missed several days because of dates. (Not to mention spending the past week just rolling around at home.)
At this rate, he’d probably get fired soon.
“Hwaaahm—”
Manager Cha was also at the store today. He was observing Yeomin intently, who was tired from not getting any sleep until dawn.
Unable to bear it any longer, Yeomin spoke up.
“Why do you keep staring at me?”
No matter his employment status, some things needed to be said.
When Yeomin looked back defiantly, Manager Cha seemed incredulous, as if Yeomin was the one out of line. Then he handed Yeomin a handkerchief that had been lying nearby, almost throwing it at him.
“Put this around your neck. You’ll catch a cold from the air conditioning.”
“I’m fine. I feel like I’m getting heatstroke actually.”
“Just do it when I tell you to.”
“No thanks. It’s uncomfortable. That’s why I rarely wear collared t-shirts.”
As Yeomin was talking back out of defiance, a customer happened to come in, and he greeted them.
But the regular customer’s gaze lingered on Yeomin’s nape as they exchanged greetings.
After the customer went to their seat, Yeomin felt something was off and checked his neck in a mirror.
“That bastard Seol Jiho…”
Yeomin chewed on a curse. There was a red mark on his neck that looked like a mosquito bite.
It definitely wasn’t there during sex yesterday. Since he couldn’t remember it happening, Jiho must have made it while he was asleep.
‘I’m going to raise hell when I see him today.’
As Yeomin was grinding his teeth, Manager Cha threw the handkerchief at him again.
“See? Told you so.”
This time, Yeomin didn’t resist and quietly wrapped the handkerchief around his neck.
Although he had signed the contract with the intention of making their relationship public anyway…
He hadn’t planned on drawing attention with such marks at his workplace.
His face heated up with embarrassment.
“Joo Yeomin. Have you thought about the workshop schedule?”
Manager Cha, seemingly also feeling awkward, changed the subject.
It was just going somewhere to drink, but calling it a “workshop” made it sound impressive.
Yeomin responded politely.
“I’m sorry, boss. I don’t think I can go this time.”
Manager Cha looked like he had already expected the rejection.
He could have asked why, but he didn’t.
“You and Mingyu have fun without me. Don’t eat anything too expensive. It’ll make your stomach hurt. Just eat something like ramyeon.”
“No way. If you’re not coming, why should we go? Mingyu can’t drink, so he’s no fun.”
Manager Cha grumbled. Still, it felt nice that he said it wouldn’t be fun without Yeomin.
But Yeomin didn’t feel the same desperate longing for this vacation that he would have felt before.
Maybe it was because dealing with Jiho alone kept him busy these days. Each day felt like a workshop, a retreat, and endurance training all rolled into one.
“Joo Yeomin, I’m just asking out of curiosity.”
Manager Cha began. As luck would have it, there were unusually few customers today, making it perfect for chatting.
“Did you get a girlfriend?”
After seeing the kiss mark, he was probably asking this with 90% certainty. Yeomin was at a loss for how to answer.
If he said “no” here… would that make him a youth enjoying very casual encounters?
That kind of promiscuity was far from his character.
Yeomin put on a brazen face and lied shamelessly.
“No, I didn’t.”
“Then, did you get a boyfriend?”
“What?”
Damn it. He was so surprised he squeaked.
Manager Cha already had a look of certainty. The look of someone who saw right through to the identity of the “man” who left marks on Yeomin’s neck.
He probably also already guessed why Yeomin said he couldn’t go on vacation.
‘What if I get fired today?’
‘What if he fires me saying he can’t keep a gay as a part-timer? That would be unfair. Should I report it to the Ministry of Employment and Labor?
But am I really gay? If I had sex with a man, does that make me gay…?’
His mind was becoming clouded with confusion. Manager Cha hit the nail on the head.
“Joo Yeomin, you were a virgin before. So this must be your first relationship.”
Suddenly dropping truth bombs? Yeomin pouted.
“That’s none of your business, boss.”
When Yeomin exercised his right to remain silent, Manager Cha snickered.
“I get that you’re excited and out of control because it’s your first time, but the backlash later will be huge.”
“You’re such a young boomer.”
“What did you say?”
“I said thank you for the advice.”
Manager Cha lightly tapped Yeomin’s forehead as he was being flippant.
This time, he advised in a truly serious tone.
“Take it easy with both relationships and work. No matter how much you try to control it, your first relationship probably won’t go as planned.”
“…”
“But if the first time is extr-emely painful, you won’t even dare try a second or third time. So for the first time, you can be a bit more careful and take it slow.”
Yeomin felt strange at this sincere advice.
He hadn’t thought at all that he was putting his heart and soul into this fake relationship.
Ironically, while listening to Manager Cha’s advice, Yeomin realized just how focused he had become on Jiho.
‘Turns out everyone knew except me.’
If that’s how it looked to Manager Cha, to Jiwoong, to Director Ahn… then maybe it was true.
He wondered if this change in his feelings, something even Yeomin himself couldn’t believe, was also transparently visible to Jiho.
