# Chapter 173
In Lee Hwan’s childhood, one of his friends enjoyed playing roguelike games. It was a merciless game where all levels and equipment returned to the beginning the moment you died. Unable to resist the strong recommendation, Lee Hwan tried playing it a few times but got frustrated and threw his mouse.
Reset. Reset. Another reset. Getting the hang of it, going a bit further, then reset. Going quite far, then reset.
He even went surprisingly far, amazing his friend who had been playing all along, but after taking just two careless hits from a Corrupted Mid-level Skeleton Silver Prime Warrior’s blade, he was back to being a level 1 penniless character.
What kind of game was this? Even with workbooks, at least your grades remained after solving several pages—it completely defied common sense.
Lee Hwan, who had no interest in the game to begin with, let out a lion’s roar and cleanly quit playing. And he lived forgetting about it afterward.
‘Come to think of it now, that’s also a twisted way of the world.’
A roguelike where you go back to the beginning if you slip up, but each attempt takes at least several months.
They say skills remain, but considering the penalties, you can’t just collect them indiscriminately. It’s a situation that feels like it could cause mental illness just thinking about it. Even if it weren’t reality but just a simple game, he might have become a destruction king and gone around smashing everything in sight the moment the fourth attempt failed.
That’s why Lee Hwan secretly hoped that his regression was the fourth one. Fortunately, that was the minimum number of regressions needed to piece together memories.
That was just the minimum, and even though cold reason whispered that circumstances suggested there were more, he didn’t want to believe it.
Because otherwise, he would be in too much pain. Because it was pitiful and regrettable.
But then.
“If you’re going to repeat that eight times, you might as well have just lived…”
Lee Hwan mumbled emptily, swallowing his tears.
Of course, he knew that after the world was destroyed, there would be no such thing as just living.
But tracing his memories, in one of the rounds, he had embraced all the main causes of the monster wave and self-destructed.
It was only when he was dying that he realized what Taesung was worried about, why he had repeatedly confined and tried to stop him, but still, Lee Hwan had hoped that the person he both loved and hated would live well in a world that had returned to normal.
That would have been the opportunity. But to abandon that and go around in circles, repeating it eight times.
Simply because they were friends? Comrades? The other reason that came to mind was so small and trivial that Lee Hwan couldn’t bring himself to believe it.
Tears kept welling up.
“……”
He could tell that Taesung’s actions had been different each time, trying to improve the situation somehow. Sometimes things were omitted for the sake of change, sometimes for convenience.
But at least, as far as Lee Hwan could remember, there was always one scene that remained the same.
The moment right after regression when Taesung came looking for him.
‘I’ll come find you, Joo Lee Hwan. I’ll…’
He was keeping that promise almost foolishly.
Indeed, in the rounds Lee Hwan remembered, he felt deep satisfaction and joy every time Taesung came to take him. So unable to resent him completely, Lee Hwan finally released the grip he had on the clothes.
As he wiped his tears with his other arm, he saw that Taesung was visibly perplexed. After hesitating, as if not knowing what to do upon seeing him cry for the first time, Taesung overlapped his hand on top of Lee Hwan’s.
The warmth enveloped his pale hand. Lee Hwan collapsed onto the sofa that he had pushed Taesung onto.
He had always liked how consistent Taesung was, but he hadn’t wished for this kind of consistency. And yet, he was happy to see him alive again. Happy to meet him again. That’s why gratitude and guilt bloomed amidst the resentment.
Fragments of the cruel things Taesung had done remained in his memory. Some memories even brought back the sense of betrayal from that time, choking him.
Perhaps if more memories of him resurfaced, he might belatedly reprimand him again. But for now, his heart was crushed by the repeated regressions, leaving him unable to think.
When Lee Hwan rested his head against Taesung’s body with a long exhale, Taesung’s hand gently stroked the back of his head. Lee Hwan tried to organize his confused thoughts while suppressing the surge of emotion rising again.
After the regression he had led, Taesung went through eight more regressions.
Now it was Taesung’s 8th round of regression. He would be moving according to his own plan.
If he wanted to team up with him, even if it meant beating him up, he needed to understand what that method was first.
Additionally, he needed to check on his physical condition. His past self was frequently ailing. It would be nice if it was all just coincidence, but hadn’t Taesung also suffered from headaches recently?
It was also important to know who could contribute to the plan to stop the monster wave. Judging by their relationship, Jade seemed likely to join Taesung without much opposition. He also appeared intermittently in memories of past regressions.
However, Kang Dongha apparently had never properly joined them before, and he always ended up dead or ruined at the end. There must be reasons why Taesung despised and loathed him so much, but still, if he joined, couldn’t he be quite a good variable?
A warm hand touched Lee Hwan’s face, lost in thought. Taesung was gently wiping away the remaining moisture.
“I didn’t intend to reveal it this way.”
Looking up at the confession, Taesung had eyes full of concern. He seemed to think Lee Hwan was frozen in great shock.
It’s true that he was shocked, but… well. Hadn’t he felt a lot of shock when he saw many horrific sights after the monster wave?
If he had collapsed each time, Lee Hwan wouldn’t be here now. He always checked the escape route before he felt relief and rested. No matter how much his legs trembled, he grabbed the opportunity first and then fell.
This was the moment when the missing puzzle pieces finally clicked into place. As a B-class… no, now an A-class professional Hunter who had wandered through a world on the brink of destruction, he had no intention of collapsing with weak mental strength before an important conversation.
“If you had told me first, before I found out, it would have been a confession.”
“…I’m sorry. I was afraid something would happen to you.”
His apologetic voice trembled. Lee Hwan lifted his head and stared at Taesung.
He had witnessed Lee Hwan’s death eight times. Would the image of himself reflected in his eyes be intact?
The excessive protection, bordering on coercion, that made no sense was roughly explained. The fact that he only got an answer after recovering his memories and questioning him first was irritating, but somewhat understandable.
Lee Hwan stretched out both hands and placed them on Taesung’s cheeks, whose gaze kept wavering. He flinched and fixed his eyes on Lee Hwan’s face.
“Let’s talk about that… later.”
Was he afraid of future consequences? His face hardened. But he didn’t seem displeased. As much as he had uncharacteristically wavered for a moment, his face was also slightly flushed, unlike his usual self.
After all, Lee Hwan had just wiped away all his tears after crying out loud embarrassingly. His breathing was still a bit ragged.
There were many things to blame him for, but not this matter right now. Lee Hwan had already gone to meet Kang Dongha today under the gaze of others.
“If we want to build a shelter, we need to find a safe zone first.”
Since there was much to ask immediately, it would be better to postpone resolving emotional residue for later.
“Explain. What’s the problem, and what’s the current situation. Summarize it briefly, like a gate briefing.”
Lee Hwan spoke firmly, even though his voice was still wet at the edges.
* * *
He listened to a lot of information with a dizzy mind. Lee Hwan buried his throbbing head in the pillow and took a deep breath.
Thankfully he was an Awakened. Otherwise, his eyes would have been sore and stinging by now.
‘I still have some information from when I was attached to Kang Dongying.’
‘…Most of that would be information you’d need to be reattached to him to use, I suppose.’
‘Kang Dongying is thorough. Like before, you’d have to get under him again or become a close aide.’
‘No. Please.’
Taesung’s face had been so desperate then that Lee Hwan thought he had said something terrible to him.
When he explained that since Kang Dongha had agreed to cooperate, this time he only needed to be there, Taesung’s face became even more urgent.
‘Kang Dongha is even more out of the question.’
His face was serious and earnest as he grabbed his hand in opposition. He’s not someone to be trusted. He’d rather give up that option. His appearance, lips trembling as he tried to explain, was both pitiful and detestable.
He had always been good at managing his expressions even before the regression, but when he was irritated, one of his eyebrows would twitch imperceptibly. He had clearly seen one eyebrow twitch just now, yet he belatedly put on a distressed expression—wasn’t that precisely aimed at him?
It seemed that Taesung had lost his composure and gained some cunning tricks through his regressions. It also seemed like he had definitely realized that his face worked well on Lee Hwan.
‘That guy only moves for himself until the end.’
‘That’s what I want. If he wants to live, he has to stick with us.’
The memory left by the first regression became the clue to the incident. His leash was now wrapped around Lee Hwan’s hand, whether he liked it or not.
Lee Hwan tried tapping the hand holding him, but when there was no sign of it letting go, he just left it.
Not wanting to push it away, Lee Hwan awkwardly held hands with him and spoke about Kang Dongha.
