It couldn’t be helped, but now it was time to let Yeongwon know his genuine sincerity.
“So what are you saying we should do?”
“Let’s get married, with me.”
“……”
“We’re both actors, so let’s announce it matching both sides’ positions. After properly finishing marriage preparations, about a month before? Marry me, hyung.”
“I get what you’re saying, but you can’t just get married like that. First of all, what’s important—you have to love each other.”
“I love hyung though? Hyung… don’t you?”
“Of course not. How many days has it been since you became an adult?”
“……”
“Don’t make hyung into a shameless bastard. I’ve been saying that’s not okay since before, but you still do this.”
“Haa. Then first I need to make hyung love me.”
Hearing Yeongwon’s mutter, Jiseo moistened his dry lips with his tongue as if troubled.
First of all, setting everything aside, he wasn’t someone who had to like forever just because he liked once.
They were only people who’d made a promise without proof in childhood, like ‘let’s get married,’ ‘okay!’ Because Yeongwon who followed him was cute, that’s why he’d accepted at the time.
He’d thought it was probably a promise Yeongwon had made without knowing anything either. So it was true that he’d thought lightly that it would naturally disappear later when he met many people.
The closest person to him was also himself, and he’d known him for almost every moment from birth to growing up. But because he was that much of a child, that kind of misunderstanding wasn’t incomprehensible.
“Yeongwon. Didn’t you date when you were in school?”
“I didn’t. How can I when there’s no one I like?”
“……”
“No, wait. How can I meet someone else when there’s someone I promised to marry? Should I say it this way to score points?”
“What points are you scoring?”
“Because hyung needs to love me.”
“……”
“Just by looking at a face, feelings of liking can arise. My face properly fits those conditions. Right?”
Interpreting what he confidently conveyed, it meant that since his face was quite decent, favorable feelings could bloom just from looking.
That was true. Yeongwon was pretty. And on the other hand, he was also handsome. Since that was an undeniable fact, he had no choice but to accept it.
Just by looking at a face, feelings could arise. For Jiseo, who’d heard incomparably more often than Yeongwon that faces were his type, it was naturally an understandable part.
However, no matter how pretty the face, feelings that hadn’t existed until yesterday wouldn’t conspicuously arise toward a kid who had just turned twenty. Looking at the youthful face with soft downy hair, only endless pangs of conscience bloomed.
Going to PC rooms, taking train trips. And watching a kid whose only cute transgression was enduring until turning twenty and drinking alcohol for the first time—Jiseo continued to fall into contemplation.
Whether he should accept the situation unfolding before him as a joke, or accept it as sincerity.
These two things troubled him so much that Jiseo couldn’t immediately take either side right now.
It was just awkward because actual feelings of liking him were wedged between the cute childhood promise. Even so, in reality the choice was no different from having only one option.
If he couldn’t choose either side, Jiseo decided to appropriately mix joke and sincerity.
“I don’t think I can marry you because you’re too young.”
“Young? Me?”
“By international age, the first digit is still 1. Even a thief wouldn’t steal that early.”
Though it was a choice to change Yeongwon’s heart, when he actually said it out loud, he realized it was truly something he shouldn’t commit.
“If you feel burdened, should I wait? Hyung is still young too. In about 5 years, hyung will be thirty-five. I’ll also be five years older. Would that feel less burdensome?”
“……”
“But I don’t really understand why we can’t get married because we’re young. I waited because hyung was young. Honestly, even before just saying it now, I was considering waiting one more year.”
At Yeongwon’s confident claim, Jiseo asked back with a voice mixed with an empty laugh.
“You?”
“The age when people truly believe they’ve become adults differs for everyone. Hyung said you still think I haven’t grown enough.”
“……”
“If it’s that way, me too. Your appearance is like that, and you said you still have many things you want to do. Looking at it that way, I also acknowledge that hyung is young.”
The words he’d kept on his lips from the start with the intention of maintaining humility were precisely that he was young and lacked experience.
Moreover, he remembered answering in a recent interview that much more time needed to pass to become a real adult. Yeongwon was probably mentioning that.
“But since we’re getting married anyway, doesn’t it not matter? Waiting a few more years won’t change our relationship……”
“……”
“Honestly, if I’m really being truthful, I want to take hyung when you’re prettiest.”
“If only you’d met someone. You’re really just too young.”
Perhaps to Yeongwon’s ears, it might sound like a typical reason for rejection. However, this was Jiseo’s sincerity.
Being young meant an age when the world was still narrow. Jiseo wasn’t unaware that a ten-year age gap seemed huge, but when you say thirty, the expression “merely” follows. But what wasn’t okay wasn’t okay.
“I’ve been waiting all this time because hyung was young, you know? So you could vigorously be active when you’re young. And hyung didn’t date either.”
“Hyung started working as an actor after becoming an adult. So I didn’t have time to think about other things, but you already started doing what you wanted to do, so you were freer than hyung.”
“Even if I wasn’t free, there wasn’t anyone who caught hyung’s eye. Every time I asked if there was anyone you liked, you said no.”
“Did you even try?”
“That’s—naturally I had to prepare first. When I’m all grown up, I have to propose to hyung.”
Yeongwon raised his eyebrows as if it were obvious. Though Jiseo likewise had zero dating experience, to anyone looking, the situation Yeongwon was in was several times more vast and splendid.
Nevertheless, there didn’t seem to be any particularly boastful experiences. And so Yeongwon accepted that there was no reason he should give up his feelings.
“With a first love face like this, even if it catches your eye, isn’t it still no?”
From the beginning, Yeongwon didn’t understand the meaning of the “wide world” Jiseo was talking about. He already had the best experience.
“While I’m young, hyung was also too young to be tied to me, so I waited.”
“……”
“What would people say if I snatched up a kid who just debuted? I inevitably had to wait.”
Yeongwon absolutely couldn’t understand why he didn’t understand what he was saying. So even seeing Jiseo making a baffled expression in succession, he could only shrug his shoulders.
“You. What would people say about me?”
“Even though I’ve accumulated less years than hyung, I started activities at a younger age than when hyung first started as an actor. When people see me, they think ‘he’s already grown this much, a lot of time has passed.’ They think ‘he’s acted quite a bit,’ you know?”
Setting aside that Jiseo was the senior, his career and number of works were much greater. Seeing Yeongwon defending his claims with absurd talk, an empty laugh burst out naturally.
Perhaps feeling his argument lacked persuasiveness even in his own opinion, Yeongwon gestured to cut off the reaction.
“Calm down and wait. I still have a lot to say.”
No matter how hard Yeongwon tried to persuade, looking at that fair and tall face, he couldn’t help but feel guilty. In Jiseo’s eyes, the image of Yeongwon in a school uniform was still vivid.
It had to be. It hadn’t even been many days since he took off the uniform. And yet treating him like a kid—a deflated laugh couldn’t help but emerge.
“The promise to get married is really sincere. If you just let me do the thing of making hyung like me, that is, seducing you… You’ll want to keep the promise soon, right? Let me date a little too.”
“……”
“First, don’t leak anything externally, and just hyung and I can know and continue.”
“……”
“Until hyung likes me, keep the secret, and when you come to like me, then just do whatever hyung wants to do. You can reveal you have a lover, or reveal it after the wedding ceremony is completely over.”
“……”
“But there’s something we need to make clear. If it’s really like that, I’ll back off.”
Yeongwon, who had been chattering away, took a deep breath and slowly moistened his dry lips. The small tongue sticking out and going back in, and even the white front teeth visible slightly—everything was cute.
Drawn by the cuteness, Jiseo asked in a gentle tone.
“What is it?”
“You absolutely can’t like me? My feelings of liking hyung are unpleasant, or you absolutely don’t see me as a romantic partner, or something?”
“……”
“You can’t tolerate whatever actions I take to win your heart, or you hate me…?”
“Not that, it’s because you’re young.”
