# Chapter 117
Ban Hajun turned his head and stared with an incredulous expression at the shameless request delivered without any emotional inflection. It was the reaction Mo Eunje had easily anticipated, so he smiled artificially, squinting his eyes.
“What are you smiling about? Are you his mother? Or are you just crazy?”
“Yes, I’ll be the crazy one. But he needs to eat and take his medicine.”
“I swear. I’m hearing all sorts of strange requests. If you’re that worried, why don’t you go to his place yourself?”
That wasn’t possible. Since he’d already said those words, it would be better to keep his distance for the time being unless Tae Igyeol sorted out his feelings. Truthfully, instead of staying at a friend’s place, going to his parents’ home in Busan would seem more reasonable and plausible to anyone. However, when he’d heard that Tae Igyeol was injured and traveled up by train, he’d experienced considerable stress from the pressure of physical distance, so he couldn’t just go there carelessly, not knowing what might happen.
“I’m planning to go to a close hyung’s place today.”
“Where do you think you’re going? Either go to Ritz Ville or stay here.”
“Hey, even my mom doesn’t interfere like that. You’re often out because you have lots of appointments, so what am I supposed to do here alone?”
He had finished eating the seolleongtang and was about to contact Jang Jiha. But thinking rationally, since Jang Jiha had released a new poetry collection not long ago, it would be awkward to ask him for a favor as he would likely be busy with promotional schedules like book signings and book talks.
If it had been a period when Jang Jiha was preparing his work, they could have stayed together and shared the experience, but whether here or there, being alone in someone else’s home would be equally uncomfortable. It seemed the best option would be to go out now and look around real estate agencies to find a place as quickly as possible.
“I’m broke, so I won’t be going out for a while. I only have one commercial shoot scheduled for the end of June. I was just wondering what to do alone at home being bored, and now you’re here.”
“…Then I’ll buy you meals while I’m staying.”
Since he didn’t want to do a long-term stay at a motel until he found a place, he had no choice. He was genuinely grateful to Ban Hajun for going this far, but all he could do in return was buy meals. Wherever he stayed, apart from his parents’ home, he’d have to pay for food anyway, and since he hadn’t spent much money this month except for his trip to Busan, his living expenses account was still quite full, so he could easily afford to feed both himself and Ban Hajun generously.
“Since my card got cut off and my situation is what it is, I won’t refuse.”
“Yeah. Make a list of what you want to eat and decide on a delivery order. Hyung will treat you to everything.”
“Huh? Let’s go grocery shopping and cook instead of ordering delivery.”
But Ban Hajun, failing to deeply appreciate Mo Eunje’s generous intention, volunteered to do something troublesome. Mo Eunje took a big bite of dumpling, chewed it, and voiced his opinion.
“I don’t feel like cooking, it’s a hassle.”
“I’ll do it. I haven’t cooked for a while since breaking up, and my body’s getting itchy to do it.”
“You broke up again?”
“Didn’t Tae Igyeol tell you? Ah… I guess with everything happening that day, there wasn’t the right atmosphere or timing to talk about me.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I got dumped ten days ago, the day of your livestream. They were cheating on me.”
On that day, he had been busy avoiding Tae Igyeol, just sleeping at home and then going to the livestream alone. He had briefly stopped by home, but only to pick up his phone and poetry collection before heading to Jang Jiha’s place, so there hadn’t been time for such a conversation. Even if there had been, his mind was so full of Tae Igyeol that there would have been no room for Ban Hajun’s breakup.
“Let me know immediately when you get a new partner. Don’t feel awkward about bringing them home because of me.”
“You need money to date. I have to cover living expenses, various bills, phone bills, and all that with my commercial shooting pay, so I don’t have money for dates. Looks like I’m going to stay single for the foreseeable future.”
“I’ll pay half of this month’s utilities too.”
“Hey, it’s fine. Why are you drawing lines between friends? If I had my way, I’d want to split grocery costs too, but given my situation, I’m just going along with it. Let me rely on you for that.”
He understood completely that even between close friends, letting someone stay at your home wasn’t easy. In fact, Mo Eunje was more grateful to Ban Hajun for not having to do a long-term stay at a motel.
“I’m saving on accommodation, so I’m actually the one benefiting here. What do you mean relying on me? Anyway, go check on Tae Igyeol after we eat. Don’t mention me.”
“Haah… You two are really exasperating. What sin did I commit in my past life…”
“Please, I’m asking you. While I’m staying here, I’ll do all the cleaning, laundry, dishes, and recycling.”
“Really? You have to keep that promise.”
“Yeah. It’s not that I can’t do it, I’m actually really good once I start. Have you finished eating? I’ll clean up, so you hurry and get ready to go.”
He wasn’t confident he could satisfy Tae Igyeol’s standards, but he was confident he could do it well enough to make Ban Hajun’s eyes pop out in surprise. He had watched Tae Igyeol do these things for years, so even imitating him would make Ban Hajun’s officetel at least three times cleaner than it was now.
“Oh right. While you’re there, bring back my laptop too.”
“Got it. I just need to check if Tae Igyeol has eaten and taken his medicine, right?”
“Yes.”
“I’m suffering because of you two’s drama.”
“Thank you. I’ll clean everything spotlessly and treat you to something delicious for dinner. You know how I feel, right?”
Mo Eunje winked and flashed a finger heart. Ban Hajun frowned as if he’d seen something revolting. Only after seeing his genuinely disgusted face did Mo Eunje belatedly realize how unconvincing Tae Igyeol’s pretense of disgust had been whenever he had been overly affectionate.
“Get out.”
“I also lo— Actually, I’m not doing this because I want to. Stop dawdling and hurry up.”
He was about to say “love you” soullessly and nonchalantly but paused and consciously changed direction. Now he’s too scared to freely express friendliness. He used to enjoy seeing the disgusted reactions, but now he had lost a major source of amusement.
Mo Eunje saw Ban Hajun off at the entrance and then tapped his temples a couple of times with his palms to clear his mind of distracting thoughts. He began the major cleaning by starting the washing machine. He had volunteered for household chores knowing that stray thoughts disappear at some point when immersed in simple physical labor.
He organized the messy scattered items and washed a cloth to start wiping the dusty display cabinet in the living room. Thinking it might be nice to go out for samgyeopsal, which both he and Ban Hajun liked, for dinner, he moved his hands diligently. If he became physically tired, he might be able to sleep well tonight.
&
After parking in the underground garage of Ritz Ville, Ban Hajun stepped outside the villa building instead of going up to the fifth floor. He planned to stop by a cafe to buy two iced Americanos before going up. He also wanted to buy some cake slices, but his financial situation was so dire that he could only look at them with his eyes. It wasn’t that he wanted to buy them for Tae Igyeol, who didn’t enjoy sweet desserts, but rather for himself.
“When the drinks are ready, please put them aside. I’ll be right back after making a quick call.”
After asking this of the employee who took his order, he went out to the cafe’s outdoor smoking area. As he smoked, he thought about Tae Igyeol and Mo Eunje. Mo Eunje had once said that when he did it, it was the love of the century, but when others did it, it was just disgusting, and Tae Igyeol had said the most boring things were other people’s romances and celebrity gossip. Unlike them, for Ban Hajun, the most interesting thing after acting was precisely other people’s romance stories.
But this time, it wasn’t very entertaining. As someone who had witnessed the turning point in Tae Igyeol and Mo Eunje’s relationship brought about by the confession, he couldn’t help but feel sorry for them, though he was curious about how it would end. He understood Tae Igyeol’s passionate and tender feelings that he had harbored for a long time, and he also understood Mo Eunje, who felt betrayed by the closest friend he had never doubted.
However, seeing how much Mo Eunje was worrying about Tae Igyeol, it was clear he wasn’t completely indifferent. From Ban Hajun’s perspective, having many friends and relationship experiences, the concern Mo Eunje showed and his actions toward Tae Igyeol couldn’t be attributed solely to friendship, even for close friends who had grown up like brothers. It’s one thing to say they were like family, but frankly, they weren’t actually family and didn’t share a single drop of blood.
If Mo Eunje had been filled only with a sense of betrayal, regardless of what kind of relationship they had before, he would have been overwhelmed with displeasure and anger and wouldn’t have worried about Tae Igyeol. He would have been too consumed by his own emotions to have the capacity for concern.
But Mo Eunje, even after receiving the confession, was more focused on worrying about Tae Igyeol than caring for his own feelings. This was difficult to attribute to their previous relationship or habit. He was genuinely worried, which is why even Ban Hajun, as a third party, could feel Mo Eunje’s conflict.
Of course, since he didn’t have friends like Tae Igyeol and Mo Eunje, he could be mistaken, but his intuition for these types of relationships had never been wrong thanks to his mind being exceptionally attuned to matters of romance. That’s why last April Fool’s Day, he was the only one who noticed that Tae Igyeol had a crush on Mo Eunje, while Mo Eunje himself hadn’t realized it.
Whatever conclusion his friends reached, Ban Hajun just hoped they wouldn’t suffer for long, wouldn’t get hurt, and wouldn’t feel emotions like regret or guilt toward each other. After all, it’s perfectly normal and natural for a person to like another person.
However, it’s harder to accept these feelings when you’re like family, and the world still considers same-sex relationships taboo. With a bitter heart, he stubbed out his shortened cigarette in the ashtray and went back into the cafe to pick up the two iced Americanos in the carrier. He would support and encourage them whatever decision they made, just as they had done for him.
