Miros tried to hold on somehow, but eventually hung his head and fell asleep. Miros, sprawled out pathetically, became quiet. I looked down at such a Miros and carefully lifted him into my arms.
—Kids. Open a path for me.
The Dryads who responded to my resonance gathered and opened a path. And through that path, I returned Miros to the human fold. Along with some supplies enclosed.
I don’t know how much time has passed. I just rolled around aimlessly. I couldn’t really do anything, and I didn’t want to. I was just at a loss in the sense of loss and emptiness I’d never experienced before.
I can’t be certain it was perfect, but I did my best.
It was difficult to cleanly erase Miros’s memory. Since Miros had been with me from such a young age, there was too great a possibility he’d become an idiot if I erased everything.
It would have been much easier if I could manipulate the memories themselves, but most regrettably, that was impossible. Because he’d already received my power, even if at a small and minimal level. On top of that, his own will was too strong.
If I tried to force it, it wouldn’t have been impossible, but if I gave a strong shock to the head, it wouldn’t just be a matter of memory but his life could be in danger. In the end, I backed down and gave up.
If I sent him back to the human community only for him to become an idiot, he’d easily become a corpse.
Though it may be nothing to me, humans are dangerous to humans. Those things don’t hesitate to commit fratricide for profit. Miros has considerable beauty and various advantages, so there will inevitably be many individuals targeting him. So it would be troublesome if I completely emptied his head.
So what I chose was to erase what I was. Since I couldn’t erase myself, I erased everything that could recognize what I was. And I severed all the seams so it would be difficult to draw out emotions from the remaining memories.
In other words, I made it so the memories themselves could be looked at but it would be difficult to recall the emotions. Even after doing that, I was anxious, so I additionally painted over some memories pitch black. So they couldn’t be easily looked at.
In fact, this method isn’t perfect. Just in case, the memories could be restored. Because I didn’t completely eliminate them but severed and cut them out. On top of that, I only painted them pitch black and dug them out sparsely like they were moth-eaten, so if luck is bad, there’s a possibility they could be restored.
Of course, it’s only a possibility. Having such intense will for anything else is absolutely not an easy thing.
Moreover, since human memory is unstable, when new memories are created, even that will quickly be pushed out and forgotten. Time will solve it.
In the end, Miros won’t be able to find me again.
Even while telling myself I did well, I couldn’t help the sad feeling. I’m glad I sent him back as quickly as possible. If our bond had deepened more, I wouldn’t have been able to send him away even knowing I should.
I shouldn’t have carelessly stolen him. I should have sent him back quickly when I realized. They say regret is always late no matter how fast. I used to laugh asking what that meant, but it wasn’t a joke.
Sometimes human proverbs have something that penetrates from unexpected places.
“I’m bored. Empty. Quiet.”
At my words, Havi, who was tearing into a deer, shouted irritably.
“So what do you want me to do about it?”
“Right. What do I want to do?”
What did I want? Why did I do that? I don’t really know.
***
[Levia]
After returning Miros to the human world, I loitered around Havi’s vicinity. I’m not really doing anything. I just came out because I didn’t want to be alone. I know the Dryads are worried about me, but it can’t be helped.
The only one I can communicate with is Havi. At least Havi pretended to understand. The Dryads rather welcomed Miros’s absence. Not only did they not appreciate Miros’s prettiness, they couldn’t empathize at all. Even though they have me as their Progenitor.
Heartless things. They don’t understand why I’m so empty. They were just displeased with the human who only consumed. Well, it can’t be helped. Humans are originally consuming individuals.
That’s not a bad thing. Why don’t they understand that if you only multiply infinitely, that also eventually leads to destruction? Everything must circulate. The Dryads are too simple. Even knowing they’re originally such beings and that’s their duty, so it can’t be helped, I feel hurt.
“You really brought that human in for nothing. You only learned a bunch of useless human emotions. Especially only the negative ones.”
“You’re right. The current me needs a state change. But I can’t really think of a method.”
Havi is really a good gray bear, but too hateful. Sometimes it seems like he’s comforting me, then on other days he’s annoyed and irritated. But most regrettably, I had no choice but to meet even such a Havi.
Because Havi was the only one to talk to. Moreover, Havi is a very smart gray bear. He sometimes gives me answers I hadn’t thought of.
“If you’re going to be like that, just pick up another one.”
His tone was blunt, but even so, his worried gaze didn’t leave me. I’m grateful he’s worried, but isn’t that too fickle? It’s completely different from what he just said. A complaint naturally popped out of my mouth.
“You just scolded me for picking one up for nothing.”
“All humans are the same anyway. You just feel that Miros guy is special because he was the first. If you pick up a few more, it’ll be nothing, right?”
“…Miros was the prettiest.”
Even Havi doesn’t seem to appreciate how pretty Miros was. It’s really regrettable.
After saying it, I thought of him more. I sprawled out just like that and rolled around Havi’s den like it was my nest.
“I wonder if Miros is doing well?”
“That’s already left your hands. Don’t be so clingy.”
“You’re annoying because you only say right things. But I can’t get angry because it’s the truth.”
Right. I let Miros go with my own hands. Miros will now live happily in the human world. There’s no reason for him to look for me anymore. I got too deeply involved.
“Stop whining and forget about it. Because you’re depressed, the trees are wilting too.”
Havi irritably picked up one leg of the deer he was eating and waved it in the air.
“Look at this. Because the grass is wilting, these things aren’t gaining weight either. This should be the most delicious time, but they’re so skinny there’s nothing to eat. If the forest in your territory is like this, the humans will have a great famine. They’ll all dry up and die.
That damn human, after going to the trouble of sending him back, are you going to let him starve to death there?”
“They won’t starve to death from just being a little dry.”
“After studying so hard, you still don’t know humans? When resources are scarce, the strong ones will monopolize them. Those things won’t feed their own kind. Rather, they’ll even steal the handful that’s left, you know?”
Havi is all good, but his evaluation of humans is too harsh. I’ve also learned how petty humans are, but I don’t think they’d go that far.
Even if that’s the case, it can’t be helped for those pushed out in the survival competition. They’re originally individuals that die easily anyway.
“They won’t die off as much as you’re worried about, right?”
What big deal is it if a few more die?
***
Just a little, really just a little. It was just a little less abundant because of my depression. It absolutely wasn’t at an insufficient level. There was enough left over to eat. It would have been enough to get through winter. So it’s not a big problem.
“…This is serious.”
Havi was right. Humans were truly beings who did things beyond imagination. In other words, they were individuals who completely smashed my expectations to pieces.
It’s true that it’s been very abundant in recent years by human time standards. Well, because I was so happy being with Miros. Because of my influence, the grass and trees were also lush for a while. Thanks to that, other creatures also flourished tremendously.
It was just once. It was just a short while. It shouldn’t have come to this, right?
The previous state was abundant, it’s not that the present is bad. It was just a little less than usual. It wasn’t so serious that everything would dry up and die.
But humans started a war just because it wasn’t abundant once. They destroyed and slaughtered everything around them. They smashed everything in sight and greedily devoured it.
In an instant, half of the existing population died because of humans. The humans themselves also died in tremendous numbers.
Just fighting each other isn’t a big problem. Because they’re kids who fought often originally anyway. But using that as a pretext to set fire to the forest and slaughter beasts indiscriminately is a very big problem. In other words, they completely messed up the circulation system.
They tear up grass indiscriminately and cut down trees recklessly. They scatter all kinds of dirty things and even kill the land. They catch and eat both grass-eating beasts and meat-eating beasts without distinction and strip their hides. On top of that, they even pollute the water and make everything dry up and die.
Just because it was a little less abundant, they plundered double. From everything.
This wasn’t a problem that could just be overlooked. There had been cases like this before, though not completely absent, but they weren’t serious enough to go this far. In other words, it’s the first time I’m experiencing such a situation even after existing for that long time.
They went too far. It couldn’t be helped. I didn’t want to step in if I could help it either, but the destructive acts were too severe. At this rate, there’ll really be trouble. I hurriedly woke my children.
—Kids. Wake all the ones outside too.
The Dryads who responded to my resonance gathered and asked.
—Scold the humans? Gonna clean them up?
—They did wrong. They need to be punished.
That’s right. If they caused trouble to this extent, they should take responsibility. But I was planning to admonish them moderately with words. That this is too much. That you guys should really stop and just scare them a bit.
No, maybe it could be resolved more easily. Just before leading the Dryads down, I was pleased at the faintly felt energy. Though not precise, I could tell it was humans.
Right, they must know they did wrong too. My heart became much more generous.
—I’ll punish them, but I’ll try to reason with them well.
If they say they were wrong, it would be good to pretend to lose and help them a little. They’ll probably need physical help too, right? I should have them call more Dryads. Having sent them down to wake everyone up, I even felt good thinking the matter would become easier. Enough that even the very brief wait was enjoyable.
Still, they’re intelligent beings, so they’ll understand if I talk to them. I thought easily. If they have heads, wouldn’t they think? Though in this case they really did something unimaginable, how would humans have survived until now if they were all such idiots?
But humans’ heads must have been decorations.
“If you cooperate obediently, there will be no bloodshed.”
Humans finally invaded all the way to my nest. Leading a group called an army.
