“That bastard goes home just fine on his own when you’re not at drinking gatherings. Even when he’s completely wasted, he calls his own taxi and walks on his own two feet to get in it, everything. It’s only when you’re there that he acts all pathetic pretending he can’t get home alone.”
This is kind of shocking.
Every time we drank, I struggled so much carrying Won Dogyeong home on my back, that bad bastard.
As I recalled the days of half-embracing and practically supporting his swaying body to put him in a taxi, one hypothesis suddenly flashed through my mind.
Don’t tell me, even the way he kept clinging when drunk wasn’t a drinking habit?
“What’s he like when he gets drunk when I’m not there?”
“What do you mean what’s he like, his pronunciation just gets a bit twisted and stuff.”
“Like, does he act a bit spoiled or…”
As I mumbled, Kim Sekyung looked at me with eyes that said I was pathetic.
“Would he?”
Wow.
It seemed he’d been using all his professional skills on me. He really seemed like someone so drunk they couldn’t pull themselves together.
Other memories also came flooding back—days when he’d cling to me all gloomy saying work wasn’t going well, or when I’d sometimes be sleeping in the living room and he’d lie down next to me then gradually snuggle close saying he was cold.
Since he usually acted so confidently and assertively, at those times he’d look so pitiful that my heart would soften.
Where the hell did he learn such underhanded tricks?
I was so dumbfounded that I kept letting out hollow laughs.
“Do they know too?”
I asked subtly with a glance at the two guys sleeping face down.
“Park Hyeonho doesn’t know. That’s why he talks about introducing someone to you right in front of Won Dogyeong.”
Come to think of it, at the BBQ restaurant, as soon as Park Hyeonho brought up the introduction, Kim Sekyung had interrupted with ridiculous drunken nonsense. Looking at it now, he’d interfered on purpose.
The way he talked such shit with his mouth while fighting alone because he was worried about Won Dogyeong made me feel strange. This might not have been the only time either.
…I don’t know why I’m grateful, but I kind of am.
“Nam Seongwoo seems to know, but I think he’s just planning to pretend he doesn’t know till the end because it’s bothersome.”
Mm. Even I can see you’re right.
“Anyway, he always threw that fit asking what to do about himself. I had to go draw but he kept coming over whining and whining…”
Kim Sekyung threw the dried squid he’d been holding onto the table as if annoyed.
“I just told him to confess, I was so irritated. But then the next day you showed up with that senior.”
“Ah… Junho hyung?”
He was my first boyfriend.
A senior one year above me who was an alpha—somehow he’d heard the news that I’d presented and came to greet me a few times. With the college entrance exam over and me being bored, I guess it looked fun.
Then one day he called me out and asked to date, and I was curious so I briefly went out with him.
Really briefly. At most two or three months.
“When you dumped that hyung saying you were busy as a senior in high school, do you know how much Won Dogyeong moped around? Fuck, I thought my ears would bleed.”
It was exactly as he said. I was busy dying as a senior now, but the other side who’d finished their exam was all about playing and kept calling me out, so we broke up quickly. Honestly, I can barely remember his face now.
What was Won Dogyeong like back then?
I was also annoyed with his avoidant attitude at the time, so I don’t remember well. He wouldn’t talk properly even when I asked, so I think I just kept things kind of distant not wanting to clash. I was busy studying and Junho hyung was being annoying, so I couldn’t pay much attention to Won Dogyeong.
Our relationship returned to normal around when I broke up with Junho hyung. He giggled and laughed when I told him we broke up, so that’s probably right since I remember that.
“After that, even when I told him to just confess, he absolutely wouldn’t. But even I couldn’t say anything seeing how you looked when dating. You’d meet your lovers while living with Won Dogyeong—this amoral bastard, you know?”
I awkwardly averted my eyes. I knew I wasn’t conventional either.
But to make excuses, I’d never once hidden that I lived with an alpha, and the people I dated all said it was fine when I told them at first, so that’s why I dated them.
…Though everyone’s tune changed as time went on.
I knew my situation was unusual too. That’s why I never asked anyone to date me first, and when they asked me out, I repeatedly sought understanding asking if they were okay with me living with an alpha friend, and um… I did that but…
Sigh, yeah.
Regardless of the circumstances, I knew it didn’t look good to others.
I acted selfishly thinking I had nothing to hide and nothing guilty about. If not, whatever—that’s how much I thought about it.
To be honest, even now I don’t feel terribly guilty toward the people I dated. As much as I demanded loose relationships, I also turned a blind eye to many things, and regardless of shallow affection, I never crossed moral lines.
I regret it in my head, but I feel sorry about the fact that it’s hard to truly accept it.
What I regretted was that as a result of those choices, I ended up hurting Won Dogyeong.
If I’d known Won Dogyeong liked me, I might have made slightly different choices, but there was nothing to change by rehashing what had already passed.
“I know, I was wrong…”
“So never break up… My head already hurts thinking about Won Dogyeong throwing a fit.”
I hesitated then nodded slightly. Nevertheless, Kim Sekyung continued threatening as if he still had more to say.
“When you guys get married, don’t expect congratulatory money from me. After being this much of a cupid, I should be exempt.”
I’d been quietly listening with my head down thinking I’d keep getting scolded, when I narrowed my brow.
“That’s bullshit, how much have I listened to you every time you broke up with a girlfriend? You’re the one who should hurry up and cough up the congratulatory money if you got divorced—how many times do I have to tell you?”
An “oops” expression flashed across his face as if he’d forgotten about this. But he soon returned to a shameless face.
“Regurgitating is bad for your health.”
I groped around the table and threw whatever nuts I grabbed at that arrogant face.
“Want me to make eating and running bad for your health too?”
Kim Sekyung grumbled as he moved his body to dodge the flying peanuts.
“Why does Won Dogyeong like this guy?”
Then he paused and tilted his head.
“…I don’t understand you liking Won Dogyeong either. You guys, that’s abnormal sexual desire.”
Of course I ignored him and threw a few more peanuts.
After that, we spread out Jia’s photos and fawned over them together for a bit before wrapping up. Kim Sekyung roughly lay down on the floor to sleep and I went into the room to sleep.
The next day, I was of course the first to wake up.
The other guys barely opened their eyes one by one around when the bean sprout soup was bubbling, and I fed the three bastards and quickly kicked them out.
After the guys left, Won Dogyeong circled around me like a restless puppy, as if he remembered what happened last night.
“Hey…”
“What.”
“Are you mad?”
“No.”
Really. I wasn’t mad. It was just so absurd when I thought about it again.
“Kiss…”
He followed me around as I took laundry out of the dryer and tugged at my clothes, and I ignored him.
“What? I can’t hear you well.”
“I was wrong…”
Won Dogyeong looked dejected and read the room even while folding laundry with me. I shoved a mushroom-shaped chocolate snack I’d brought from the kitchen into his mouth. I’d suddenly remembered earlier the days when we went to the study room.
He glanced at me sullenly but his mouth received it just fine.
A phantom image of a tail he didn’t even have drooping down seemed to flicker, and just as I was thinking maybe I should say it was enough now, I suddenly had this thought.
Isn’t he doing that on purpose too?
I narrowed my eyes and observed his expression.
“…Are you doing that on purpose right now?”
Then Won Dogyeong widened his eyes with an “I don’t know anything” expression and asked back.
“Doing what?”
“I heard everything from Kim Sekyung. You go home on your own even when drunk if I’m not there.”
The eyes facing me started shaking mercilessly. I felt like “DISASTER” was written in huge letters on his forehead. Seeing him press his lips tightly shut, he was definitely cursing Kim Sekyung internally.
“Was it all a lie when you said you were too drunk to walk?”
He rolled his eyeballs to the side.
“And always leaning on me sleeping in taxis?”
“…What’s wrong with that.”
Won Dogyeong retorted sulkily. As if deciding to go completely shameless, he crossed his arms and lifted his chin defiantly.
“That’s my strategy too.”
“…Wow, shameless.”
“It’s a virtue of working adults, you said so yourself.”
I was flabbergasted and let out a sigh. He grabbed my clothes again and tugged insistently.
“Ah, I was wrong. What can I do about being sleepy from drinking too much? Can’t we do it again now?”
It was brazen whining. I just stared blankly for a moment, dumbfounded by his unreasonable behavior.
“Ha, don’t even dream about it for a while.”
I shook off his hands and grabbed my laundry to escape to my room.
Wasn’t everything already in Won Dogyeong’s palm without me knowing?
Ha, really.
His effort is commendable.
Ridiculous, really.
Let’s see if I’ll obediently kiss him.
*
Won Dogyeong followed me around whining all weekend, but I stubbornly protected my lips. I wasn’t really sure what was so unfair, but anyway something felt unfair so I didn’t want to let it slide.
And Monday morning, I requested a meeting with Section Chief and told him about the pregnancy.
I only told him that one thing and didn’t make any follow-up reports about the other person or marriage.
Because I didn’t know yet either.
Section Chief made an expression holding back a million questions he wanted to ask but wasn’t sure if he should ask, trailing off with “Oh, I see…” After pondering for a long while, he finally beat around the bush and pulled out this question.
“Is it the person you said you were seeing before…?”
