His wonderful low voice spread futilely on the wind. Being able to do whatever he wants. Like that night when he first seduced me, Rashanin was talking about ennui. I felt like I knew what Rashanin was tired of.
You can’t say which is better between desperate day by day and tedious day by day. Still, everything was a matter of the heart. Perhaps if I were pushed to the very end, I might accept his proposal. But not now.
Rashanin stared intently at me. I didn’t avoid his gaze. Then he smiled.
“Still, you’re not easy.”
“Me?”
I fell for the man who declared he’d seduce me after 3 days in just one day. I was dragged to Jeju Island and grabbed a Ferrari’s steering wheel. Yesterday too, I completely fell for his finger-licking technique. Yet he says not easy.
“If it were easy, you’d be on the bed by now.”
This damn vampire. Even after tormenting me like that last night. Looking at the man shamelessly mentioning the bed with absurd eyes, I swallowed a sigh inwardly. If I took him seriously, my insides would burn black.
“So isn’t that more fun?”
“Right. That’s why it’s more fun. I’m looking forward to today too.”
Rashanin simply affirmed. Blatant and direct. The man who took a sip of champagne leaned against the railing and turned to me.
“Since you say you don’t need eternal life, I’ll tell you a wonderful way to shake off people you dislike.”
“Being unscrupulously firm?”
“Right. When they tell you to come, go and shoot a gun at the wall. Don’t shoot people.”
“Korea is…… a country with gun control.”
Before saying it was crazy, I seemed to have strangely changed, explaining Korea’s circumstances.
“Then break something your stepmother cherishes. It’s a bit extreme, but the effect is certain. I guarantee it.”
“You speak as if you’ve done it.”
“Oh, of course I have.”
“Really?”
“Are you curious?”
No, it’s fine—those words stuck in my throat. I nodded earnestly, and Rashanin laughed.
“I also didn’t get along well with my mother. She was my birth mother, but our personalities didn’t match. She’d make all sorts of excuses to summon me, then make me wait for hours. Noblewomen of that era took a long time to dress up, but anyway, it was really the worst. One day, I received word she was gravely ill and was urgently summoned from Derby’s hunting grounds, but she made me wait 3 hours. Finally, unable to bear it, I went into Mother’s dressing room and fired shots wildly.”
“……?!”
I thought I heard the word wrong. Fired shots wildly?
“Oh, don’t be so surprised. No one was hurt. Instead, a vase and mirror Mother cherished very much broke, and I just ruined lace-filled dresses. Anyway, after that day, Mother was satisfied with receiving greeting letters on Christmas and her birthday.”
I had nothing to say. It seemed like something Rashanin would do and more, but still, firing shots wildly because he didn’t want to meet his mother.
“Can’t believe it?”
“Did you really fire shots wildly?”
“Of course.”
“When? I mean, how old were you?”
“Seventeen.”
Seventeen years old. I couldn’t say anything. What on earth was he thinking—no, wait. That was the old days. No, even so. By common sense standards, this man was definitely extraordinary.
When I looked at Rashanin with disbelieving eyes, he smiled bitterly and made an excuse that wasn’t quite an excuse.
“Back then I was young and my blood was boiling. Anyway, making me talk about my embarrassing past. You’re quite capable too.”
“As you know, I didn’t intend it.”
“Of course. But how did you rebel?”
“Are you curious?”
“You’ll just let it pass after only hearing my story?”
“Mine wasn’t much. I studied hard.”
“Hm?”
“I became a good son who studied well. My half-brother was a troublemaker.”
I spent my school days studying and exercising hard to become an honor student no one could deny. And I entered our country’s best prestigious university. Unlike Unyeol who only caused trouble, I became a son my father could be proud of. That was the best revenge I could do.
“That’s like you. But it’s boring.”
“I think so too.”
“Are you considering other methods?”
Rashanin was now instigating me to commit bad deeds. I’d never raised my voice, broken things, or thrown them. Suddenly I thought of the orchid pots my stepmother cherished. Oriental orchids, which were very difficult to grow and rarely bloomed, were one of the things my stepmother treasured. I recalled being scolded to tears in early elementary school for breaking one flower stalk.
Thinking of breaking them made my heart pound.
“Did you think of something good?”
The man who had been making eye contact showed a wicked-looking smile. I smiled along. I felt good. The man always proposed things beyond limits. And it was my job to leap over them.
“I’m thinking of the pots my stepmother cherishes.”
“Bad things are learned quickly.”
Rashanin said everything was too easy so it wasn’t fun, but just imagining revenge was this exciting.
A small transgression, or reckless pleasure.
I looked at the man gazing at the distant sea. I couldn’t help but think that more than his tremendous wealth and handsome appearance, I envied and admired his composure, his unrestrained thoughts and actions.
I took a big breath. Rashanin’s words to enjoy myself spun in my head like a spell. It was truly enjoyable.
Chapter 5. Rapids
[I can’t go ㅜㅜ]
On Friday, it was raining in Jeju Island. Due to the rain that had been falling since morning, Rashanin, who was living the life of a leisurely gentleman, canceled all of today’s schedule. So today ended up being a day off. Since staying cooped up in the room felt stifling, I visited the hotel cafe while Rashanin was swimming.
While sipping coffee and watching the gloomy gray sky and sea scattering rain beyond the wide-open window, a text flew in from Seong-jin.
Seong-jin had burned with determination to see Rashanin even from afar and had reserved Lavald Restaurant last Tuesday. However, he ended up frustrated when we flew to Jeju Island that day. He said he would come to Jeju Island no matter what this weekend, but got held back by family matters.
And the weekend came around again. Seong-jin had been full of confidence, saying he had finished all preparations perfectly. But now he says he can’t come. It was yesterday that I received a text saying he had made both flight and restaurant reservations.
I stared at my phone screen and sent a reply.
[Why?]
[Emergency came up. Because of what I mentioned when we ate crab stew. It’s so unfair ㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜ I was really looking forward to it.]
It seemed to be because of the fake blood being smuggled in from China. The crying emoticons sent by the guy who kept missing opportunities were somehow cute.
I was about to text him to try for the next opportunity when texts flew in one after another.
[Damn it. You know how jealous I am, right? Jealous. Jealous. Jealous. I want to go to Jeju Island too ㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜ]
Crying emoticons overflowed. Seong-jin wasn’t particularly interested in the fact that I was lodging at a top-class hotel and idly spending time on a super-luxury yacht. Instead, he was extremely envious of the fact that I could have conversations next to Rashanin. He complained that if such an opportunity were given to him, he would have asked all the secrets of vampires. Seong-jin was quite a shameless character too.
As Seong-jin repeatedly sent “jealous” along with crying emoticons, I felt the urge to expose the identity of the vampire he so desperately longed for.
The vampire you praise so much is a lecher. At night, he transforms into a beast.
My fingers itched, but this was a secret I had to take to my grave.
[Just do your work.]
As I sent that text, I swallowed a sigh inwardly. Rashanin was a man who knew how to properly enjoy sex. I liked him touching me, and I liked touching his firm, smooth skin. The pleasure I gained from my relationship with him was like a drug. Up to here, it wasn’t bad. If there was one problem, it was that the vampire with inexhaustible stamina didn’t know satisfaction.
On top of that, he was persistent, really driving a person until they were exhausted. Not only did the rubbed and chafed places throb and ache, but my strength dropped to the point where my legs trembled. I thought this was when you’d use the expression about your body being ruined by sex.
From last Monday until today, for 10 days, I’d been spending nights faithful to instinct. At this rate, I might die from excessive indulgence.
While grumbling inwardly, I couldn’t believe I had thought of the term “dying from excessive indulgence” and held my head while sighing. This was the first time I’d recklessly caused such trouble. Outside the guest room, there were surveillance cameras and surveillance personnel, and I was having sex with a vampire of tremendous status being treated as an honored guest by the higher-ups—and with a man at that—so the thrill was overflowing and my stomach burned daily. Even I thought I was doing something crazy, yet I couldn’t stop.
“Crazy bastard.”
I cursed at myself, saying I’d been shot in the head and was doing crazy things, but strangely a bitter smile emerged. Even as I wondered how to handle this situation, since things had already come to this, half of me felt a sense of self-abandonment thinking I’d just enjoy it as I pleased and let things be, while the other half still had my heart fluttering.
