# Chapter 1
Haa, haa…
With each exhale, white vapor formed and disappeared in front of my face.
The pain spreading through every corner of my body was so terrible that I regretted regaining consciousness.
When I unknowingly opened my mouth, the dried blood crust tore, causing a stinging pain.
As I flinched from the pain while tied to the chair, the man standing in front of me turned around, seemingly noticing the sound.
But he soon turned his head away again.
“So then how should… Yes. Yes. I understand. Yes. I’ll do that.”
The sound that had been reaching my ears even before I fully regained consciousness now struck me clearly.
Though he had been polite while on the phone, once the call ended, he cursed at the person on the other end and approached me.
When his large hand came into my view, I thought the beating was about to start again.
But that didn’t happen.
“Hmm…”
He looked at me as if he had been given a difficult task.
Under the dim light, his eyes gleamed as if examining every corner of my face.
It was a chilling gaze that felt like a snake slithering over my face.
I wanted to hide from his sight, but I couldn’t say a word.
Afraid the beating that had just stopped might begin again.
The pain I had forgotten seemed to overwhelm me once more.
“Tell your mother clearly. If she goes around talking nonsense again, I’ll really kill you next time. Tell her to keep running her mouth if she doesn’t care if you die. You only get one chance. There won’t be a warning next time. Understood?”
I nodded.
Continuously, like a broken doll.
If I could only escape this place by doing so, there was nothing more I could wish for.
That day, I realized for the first time how suddenly a normal everyday life could be shattered.
“Good. I like that. Let’s practice first. I’m your mother now. Answer what I say. If I don’t like your answer, you’ll continue staying here with me.”
“…Yes.”
“Good. Kang Seomin. Where have you been? Why didn’t you answer your phone? You… got beaten up? Who? Who did this to you?”
He acted as if he really were my mother, making a fuss.
“I, I fell. I got hurt from falling. I was hurriedly going down the stairs in the dark and tumbled…”
I just hoped he would like my answer.
“Right. Not bad. Good. Let’s go with that.”
He nodded and tapped my cheek.
I wanted to scream when his hand touched my face that was covered in wounds, but I forcibly held it in.
Thinking he might release me if I just endured a little longer, I tried not to upset his mood.
“Why are you lying to your mother? Are these injuries from falling? Why are you deceiving your mother? People took you away, didn’t they? They kidnapped and beat you, right?”
“No. Nothing like that!”
“Let’s go to the police station together. We need to go to the police station together and find out who did this!”
“Just leave it alone! Nothing happened. I just fell by myself. And don’t say such strange things anymore. Everything you’ve been saying is all lies! So just stay quiet. Just be quiet. You don’t know the second son of Seyoung Group who committed suicide, and that person is not my father. Please get out of your delusion. If you don’t, I’ll die. I will!”
As I shouted like a madman, I heard laughter.
“Yes. That’s how you do it. This is good. No need to worry? Even if she’s crazy, she’ll listen when her child talks like this.”
Crazy woman.
Even though he spoke about my mother that way, I couldn’t say anything.
I couldn’t get angry, couldn’t clench my fists, I just thought about how painful and scared I was and how I wanted to get out of here.
I was such a cowardly and disgusting human being.
Beyond redemption to the point of nausea.
‘Mom…’
Bitter tears rolled down my cheeks.
The wounds stung where the tears touched, but what hurt more was my tattered heart.
The sorrowful crying continued for a while at the thought that my mother had to endure such pain all her life because I was this kind of person.
“Hey. Kang Seomin. If you’re not trying to turn me on, stop crying. Fuck. How can a guy be this pretty? I’m already confused, and if you cry too, I’ll go crazy. Huh?”
My tears stopped automatically.
“Hehehe. Cute. Should I just fuck you right now? This kid probably won’t tell anyone else. Taking down and fucking the hidden grandson of a chaebol chairman would make for good jerk-off material for a long time.”
The hand that had been on my cheek moved down to my neck and rubbed my collarbone.
The subtly probing touch seemed quite hesitant, but I felt a chill, thinking the switch could flip in an instant.
“You’re okay with getting caught for this? For someone who just does what others tell him to do. If you don’t care if I die here, go ahead and do whatever you want!”
I glared and shouted at him.
I tried not to show fear, but it wasn’t easy.
My voice trembled uncontrollably, but it seemed to work as he stopped moving with a chuckle.
“Right. Fuck. I must have been crazy for a moment. But it pisses me off to hear this from someone like you. You know what? They only said not to kill you, they didn’t say anything about not hurting you. I think I can say I beat you before receiving the call. What do you think?”
Before he finished speaking, a fist flew at my face, and my body, tied to the chair, fell to the ground.
I wriggled to avoid the boot heading for my face, but with my hands tied behind my back, I was helpless.
Would I be able to return?
Would I be able to return alive?
Until I lost consciousness, that was the only thought in my mind.
* * *
Paranoia.
A symptom of thinking one is being unjustly persecuted by others.
That’s what I found when I searched online.
‘Unjustly…’
As I looked up from searching on my smartphone, my mother was watching me.
Like a sunflower waiting for the sun, mom smiled fully when our eyes met, as if she was overwhelmed with joy.
I smiled back at her too.
Unrealistic beauty.
Whenever people saw my mother, they said she was more beautiful than a movie actress, and when they saw me beside her, they said I was the spitting image of her.
But now I rarely met such people.
Since I hardly ever went outside.
After I was kidnapped and released, mom couldn’t bear it if I wasn’t in her sight, and she minimized outings.
For a while, mom told people I met that I was the grandson of the Seyoung Group chairman, but people who saw her like that said she had paranoia.
It would have been too absurd to believe.
There must have been an unapproachable gap between me and the grandson of the 5th largest conglomerate.
Still, after I returned from being kidnapped, she didn’t say such things anymore.
I didn’t need to say what the person who took me told my mother to say.
Mom seemed to know why I was kidnapped and didn’t mention the name “Seyoung” after that.
Now it seemed all mom wanted was for me to always be within her sight.
How miserable it is when desires become that trivial.
“Do you want something to drink, Seomin?”
“No. What about you, Mom? Are you thirsty?”
“No. Mom doesn’t need anything. As long as Seomin is in front of me.”
“Okay.”
Mom owned a building, and we lived comfortably with the rent that came from it.
So even more, I had no reason to go out.
Wondering if time was actually passing, I stared blankly out the window as seasons changed multiple times.
Before I knew it, I had turned twenty-six and graduated from university.
It was questionable whether I would be able to attend university, but technological advancements solved the problem.
As long as mom could see me, she was reassured, and she checked on me through the app until I returned.
When I came back from school, I asked mom what she did today, but I already knew the answer.
She would have been watching me all day long.
I thought it would be good if mom developed other hobbies, but that seemed like it would never happen.
I’d said it many times before, but nothing changed.
While looking at the translation manuscript I received as a part-time job, I pulled up “Tomorrow’s Perfect All-kill” on the screen.
It was a program that maintained the legacy of idol survival shows, a cable TV entertainment show, and I often watched it because I had trainees I was supporting.
‘I wonder if these kids will be eliminated in the next round? Why is their ranking so low?’
From the beginning, their rankings were not high.
They were classified based on their first performance and interview, and the trainees I liked were between grades 3 and 5 out of 5.
Rather than participants who were already contracted with large agencies from the start, the kids who wandered like lost chicks without an agency caught my attention more.
Han Sijin was the first one I started supporting in that program.
He would definitely need vocal training, but his appearance surpassed anyone who participated in the audition program.
Twenty-one years old, with clean-cut features and a constantly irritated, cat-like expression.
He often glared at the cameras following him with annoyance, so while blankly watching the screen, I frequently found myself suddenly making eye contact with Han Sijin.
I thought he would have a hard time because he spoke without filters, not knowing his place, and sure enough, it was exactly as I predicted.
