“……!”
A scent I’d never smelled before.
No, some kind of energy was flowing out from my body.
“This is…….”
Like a small candle flame swaying in the draft, faint and unstable.
Yet it wraps around my entire body without gaps.
Lee Haram’s words were right.
Instinctively, I had a hunch.
‘Pheromones!’
A faint scent of rain, a grassy smell like what you’d feel in a wet forest.
Unless the diffuser rolling around in the drawer had leaked, this must definitely be my pheromones. What’s more, that diffuser was musk scented!
“Urgh……!”
That scent gradually intensified over time.
The pheromones that had been flickering as if about to go out suddenly began burning fiercely like sparks transferred to dry firewood.
A foul stench like strong perfume had been dumped on me.
My body grew heavy, and an oppressive pressure as if my entire body was being compressed.
My heart pounded violently.
A vicious cycle occurred where the pheromones expanded in volume as much as my emotions were shaken.
It was useless trying to hold onto reason. When something keeps pouring out from the depths of my body, how can I maintain a clear mind?
“Haa, kugh!”
I can’t stop it. I didn’t even know how to stop it in the first place.
Once the pheromones started leaking out, like a burst dam, they only accelerated—there was no sign of stopping at all.
With motion sickness so severe I felt dizzy, I eventually gripped the medicine bottle while barely supporting my upper body by leaning on the desk.
With trembling hands, I grabbed a few pills and dumped them into my mouth.
It takes time for the medication to take effect. Will I be able to hold out until then?
“Uurk!”
At that moment, nausea hit. Before I could even stop it, I threw up what was in my stomach.
Having eaten nothing, I only vomited stomach acid.
The problem was it was right after taking the medicine.
The pills I’d just swallowed were lying on the floor in perfect condition.
“Damn it…….”
Curses came out on their own.
Tears streamed down.
Not because I’m sad or in pain. It’s closer to a physiological phenomenon, like when cutting raw onions or during chemical, biological, and radiological warfare training.
My face reflected in the window was a mess with cold sweat and tears.
What’s even more maddening is…….
“Cra-crazy…….”
The part that suddenly expanded in volume……
A certain part of my pants.
Damn it.
This is the first time in my life experiencing something like this with no warning signs.
Of course, in my previous life when I was healthy in my mid-teens, there were times I couldn’t control the overflowing energy in the morning.
However, that’s strictly a previous life story.
In this life, I can say with certainty that I’ve never once felt sexual desire.
The second time I experienced my teens was healthy, excluding the constitution problem. It was healthy, but that part never acted up with a mind of its own. I never had my heart flutter looking at the opposite sex or had lewd dreams.
In other words, I had no sexual desire at all.
I never even tried to do it alone. At this age (I mean mental age), it’s embarrassing to comfort myself alone, and with no desire, there’s no reason to do it.
Compared to Alphas of that age range, I could truly be called a ‘sage.’
‘Is this the backlash from constantly suppressing pheromones……!’
That’s why it was even more maddening.
The suddenly arriving youth was only bewildering.
Between the motion sickness feeling like my internal organs were turning inside out, and the pressure felt in my groin……
I felt pain there like it would burst, but I have neither the energy nor the presence of mind left to resolve it by hand.
It was a different type of hell from when I came into contact with others’ pheromones.
‘Why is it suddenly going berserk!’
Actually, if I think about it even a little, I can figure out the reason.
‘When emotions get intense, a lot of pheromones leak out.’
‘You should think of yourself as being in a state like a balloon that could pop at any moment, Gunho-ssi.’
‘The pheromones that have accumulated until now will explode and either you’ll die from shock…… or someone else will be sacrificed.’
A hole was punched in the tightly inflated balloon.
Just from recalling that face I’d forgotten.
‘No, does it make sense for my body to become like this just from thinking about family once?’
The cause and effect relationship was such a mess I felt like I’d lose my mind even more.
That person, unhelpful until the very end!
“I’m going cra……zy, argh…….”
Properly feeling my pheromones was a tremendously great first step, but the moment I took that step, I nearly ended up in the morgue.
Lee Haram’s instructions weren’t the problem. It was my mistake for not paying more attention to my primary care physician’s words.
‘Save me.’
Would it be better if I just doused myself with cold water?
They said pheromones can be partially removed through physical washing, so it wouldn’t be without effect.
But the problem was whether I could walk to the bathroom.
In the end, I couldn’t take a single proper step and collapsed right there.
“Heuuk, ugh…….”
Steam rose above the floor from my hot breath.
In the midst of not being in my right mind from dizziness and headache, my lower body touching the floor is driving me crazy again. The volume…… is bigger than what I know.
‘This kind of thing…… is an Alpha?’
I heard Alphas are more impressive when in battle mode.
I bit down hard on the mystery of the human body I didn’t want to know.
Even in pain, my entire consciousness focused on the strange sensations exploding like lightning.
‘N-no! I’m not some beast!’
This life, didn’t I resolve not to do this?
Not to become those trash Alphas, ‘Baek Wooheon’ and ‘Baek Gunho.’
Not to fall to the same level as those who had their brains pickled in base acts!
……Right. I hate being Alpha, Omega, all of it.
That damn novel world itself is still uncomfortable. Honestly, it still disgusts me to death.
It’s been that way since I first opened my eyes in ‘Baek Gunho’s’ body at age 6.
But now I truly realize I’ve become a member of that world.
What I’m emitting right now is unmistakably Alpha pheromones.
It’s an undeniable truth.
……However.
‘I don’t want to acknowledge it.’
I don’t want to become an Alpha.
I don’t want to be an Alpha.
These pheromones, this desire, this body, right now.
None of it is mine.
It must not be……!
A stinging pain was felt from my bitten lip.
A thin, red stream flowed down along my jawline.
A droplet of blood hung at the tip of my chin and…….
“……Hyung.”
One drop fell with a plop.
Onto someone’s hand.
“Snap out of it.”
The pleasantly cold floor suddenly grew distant.
My body was lifted up on its own.
When I barely turned my head, an expressionless face was looking down at me.
“Seol, heon-ah…….”
When did he arrive? Is it already time for school to let out? Then was I crawling on the floor until that time?
Beyond Baek Seolheon in his school uniform, I could see the wide-open front door and middle door. ……But something was strange.
“The door…… why…….”
Glass shards were piled up like a mountain on the floor, and the metal frame was completely torn off and scattered with shoes.
The 3-panel sliding middle door was smashed to pieces.
“Never mind that.”
No, what do you mean ‘never mind that’? What’s that disastrous scene that looks like a truck crashed into it?
When I checked to see if Baek Seolheon was hurt, fortunately he looked fine. Then did armed robbers come by while I was collapsed? I paid a lot to an interior designer for that…….
Of course, there was no way Baek Seolheon would answer the questions in my mind.
Seolheon snatched up the medicine bottle that had been rolling around on the floor and took out three pills.
The hand holding the pills carefully settled near my mouth.
“Eat.”
“…….”
“Is it hard?”
Honestly, I don’t even have the strength to move my lips now.
I gathered all my energy and shook my head left and right very minutely, about 0.1mm, but somehow understanding my true feelings, Baek Seolheon made me take the medicine again.
“……Ugh!”
Right after, my vision shook drastically.
Baek Seolheon’s solid two arms supported my back and the back of my knees and lifted me up at once.
I was held in Baek Seolheon’s arms without resistance.
I realized exactly 3 seconds later that people call this a princess carry.
‘He’s, he’s strong…….’
I felt it before when Seolheon grabbed and pulled my arm, but even though our builds are similar, the level of muscle strength seems different.
Because of the position, I could see Baek Seolheon’s face well.
Seolheon’s face has the same expressionlessness as usual. But somehow it’s fierce.
As a result of observing over the past decade or so…… he’s angry. With a very high probability.
‘In the end…… did I betray the promise again?’
The promise with Baek Seolheon came to mind again. How long has it been since I vowed not to collapse from constitution problems and this chaos happens? I was ashamed as an adult.
‘But who would’ve known this disaster would happen…….’
I was afraid of the nagging that would pour out later, but still, I was truly relieved that Baek Seolheon came.
If I’d been living alone in a studio, I might have died of shock just as my primary care physician said, unable to even go to the emergency room.
If I’d become rigor mortis in this state, wouldn’t I have become a figure the police and medical examiner would talk about for ages? As a corpse with a swollen middle, looking fierce…….
No, but.
Wait!
‘Fuck, it’s all visible!’
As my body that had been face down turned upward, that tremendous presence became clearly visible to both eyes.
There’s no way Baek Seolheon can’t see this!
‘Why of all things! Did I have to wear loose cotton training pants! And gray ones at that!’
I wanted to cover it with my hands but I had no strength, only able to move my fingers slightly.
My face, already hot from elevated body temperature, heated up even more.
“…….”
But whether it was unfortunate or fortunate, Baek Seolheon didn’t even give a glance in that direction and walked straight ahead.
Could it be, is he taking me to the hospital emergency room like this? In this state? The shame came before the physical pain.
In the midst of all that, the place where Baek Seolheon stopped walking was…… unexpectedly, my room’s bathroom.
“Why here…….”
Baek Seolheon, without saying anything, slowly laid my body down leaning against the bathtub.
And in a position where we sat overlapping side by side, with my back and his chest pressed together.
The jacuzzi that my adoptive father had installed on his own had enough room for two large men to fit comfortably.
“…….”
In the ambiguous position of whether he was embracing me from behind or choking my neck with his forearm, the moment I tried to look at Baek Seolheon.
Swoooosh-!
Out of nowhere, water poured down over my head.
“Ugh!”
Ice-cold water hit my entire body forcefully.
Not just my hair but even my clothes got completely soaked in an instant. Baek Seolheon’s school uniform was the same.
Whether the bathtub drain was plugged, the cold water gradually rose in level.
Cold water friction on my heated body—it didn’t feel bad, but I couldn’t understand the meaning of Baek Seolheon’s actions.
The front was cold, the back was hot.
I was conscious of my back where Baek Seolheon’s body heat made contact.
“Seol…….”
“Match your breathing to mine.”
Baek Seolheon’s face was behind me and couldn’t be seen.
The navy blue school uniform sleeve soaked with water, and the veined hand exposed below it, gripped my shoulder strongly.
His voice was as forceful as his grip.
“Hurry.”
