There was no way Seonwoo Jin could handle Jion, who had regained extreme rationality the moment his trauma button was pressed. Even Seonwoo Jin, with those big eyes filled with tears as he sobbed, thought about it and realized Jion’s words made sense.
No matter how self-centered, immature, shallow-thinking, and emotional Seonwoo Jin was, could he really say something like “So what? Even if Geon hyung fails and can’t make money, I still need to start dating you from now on” in front of Ryu Geon’s grandmother, who couldn’t be trifled with? Absolutely not. In the end, Seonwoo Jin nodded his head while crying at Jion’s words.
“…You don’t hate me, right?”
While saying such heart-wrenching, cute, and vulnerable words. How could he not cry when his first love—which this young man full of validation needs and affection deficiency thought had been fulfilled—was so absurdly shattered in just one night? Jion looked at Seonwoo Jin’s tears with magnanimity.
“Who could hate you?”
Jion completely denied his pre-regression self.
“I like you so much too. But… but right now, instead of being swayed by or bound to those feelings, we should prioritize bigger goals. Things we need to do in life right now. Things we can’t miss the timing on. Let’s focus on those first…”
For example, practical exams… college entrance exams… university admissions… not having to retake the year…
Recalling those familiar and cruel words, Jion steeled himself to not weaken in front of the crying handsome man. Right. Of course, if you were an ordinary, sensible person living in Korean society, there were things you had to accomplish at that age. What Jion and the BNCZ members needed to achieve right now was precisely making a name for themselves and succeeding.
“I’m sorry for hurting you…”
Jion spread his arms and pulled Seonwoo Jin’s vast shoulders into an embrace, burying his face in them. At Jion’s proactive display of affection, Seonwoo Jin gradually stopped crying, thinking that the words “I don’t hate you, I like you so, so much” weren’t lies. However, Seonwoo Jin hadn’t completely recovered from the shock of being rejected, so he released Jion’s embracing arms and asked.
“…Then are we going to keep being like we are now?”
“Like we are now? You mean…?”
A steamy image flashed through Jion’s mind. It was what they had done lying on this very bed just yesterday. If they were going to keep doing things like this… friends with benefits… something like that? Jion was flustered by the overly open sexual culture.
Still, to comfort Woojin…
“…Yeah, well. What would change between us, anyway?”
“…Really?”
“Of course.”
It was all for the group. Sacrificing the small for the greater good—it was just a matter of him being a bit more open-minded, open-bodied. Well, having sex with Seonwoo Jin was a bit embarrassing, but it wasn’t unpleasant… Jion nodded his head firmly to reassure Seonwoo Jin, and only then did Seonwoo Jin relax, throwing his body into Jion’s embrace while whining.
“Then we’ll keep using the same room from now on, right?”
“Yeah.”
“We’ll share the bed too?”
“…Uh, mm. We’ll have to.”
“When we travel for schedules, you’ll sit next to me, right?”
“Of course.”
Huh? That’s it? What, no “let’s do it at least twice a week” or something?
Jion was inwardly flustered when the requests turned out to be more wholesome than expected. However, the expression on this giant handsome man making these childish demands was so serious that it was clear all these requests were sincere. Jion realized anew that he still knew nothing about Seonwoo Jin.
“…Don’t be uncomfortable around me either. Got it?”
So you can be weak like this too. I thought you just whined and got jealous and acted annoying all the time…
Looking at Seonwoo Jin’s face with tear stains still not dry, Jion understood why women had screamed that they could give everything to Seonwoo Jin’s face on screen.
He’s really handsome enough to cause a social controversy…
His heart swelling, Jion couldn’t take his eyes off Seonwoo Jin’s face as he wrapped his arms around his neck and fell sideways. Then he pushed Seonwoo Jin’s long legs to make him lie flat on the bed, rested his head on his arm, and whispered.
“I’m not uncomfortable at all.”
“…Thank you.”
Seonwoo Jin answered, carefully embracing Jion in his arms. For Seonwoo Jin, who was extremely afraid and anxious about being rejected, the certainty Jion gave him was incredibly sweet and stable. As Jion pulled the blanket over them and patted him soothingly to go to sleep, Seonwoo Jin nodded and thought how truly fortunate it was that he liked Jion.
* * *
The next morning, Jinyeong returned to the dorm looking like a bank robber. He had his mask pulled up below his eyes, and as if advertising that he was a celebrity, he wore a black mask again. His hat was also pulled down so far that anyone could tell he was a celebrity hiding his face, but fortunately, the other accessories successfully blocked his excellent physique and aura. Ryu Geon and Eungi, who had come to the entrance at the sound of the door opening, were shocked when they saw what Jinyeong was carrying.
“Hyung, are you emigrating or something?”
“Jinyeong-ah, what’s all this?”
“What do you mean what? My mom being nosy. Ah, it’s heavy!”
Jinyeong set down the luggage that had made him look like an ordinary person in the kitchen and immediately sprawled out in the living room. It was a giant insulated bag with intense floral patterns, filled with 5kg of homemade kimchi, four bottles of beef bone broth frozen in plastic bottles, various dried side dishes, and sauces.
No one would think an idol would be carrying this large amount of provisions for someone living alone from the bus terminal all the way to the subway.
Jion was impressed by Jinyeong’s excellent disguise. Though he himself seemed to think that just a hat and mask were enough to hide his identity. Jinyeong’s skin looked particularly smooth and polished as he threw off his mask as if it were suffocating.
“Did you put something on your face?”
“I put on a face mask at dawn before I left.”
“Your skincare game is crazy.”
“We’re going into single album prep soon, I have to take care of myself.”
Jinyeong grinned. Ah, right. The comeback. At Jinyeong’s ambitious smile, Jion remembered the comeback he had forgotten about for a while. Just yesterday, he had been going on and on to the hurt Seonwoo Jin about how they had to prioritize idol activities and succeed first to receive profit shares, yet Jion had completely forgotten about the next single.
“So… what did we decide to do that time…”
“I think we roughly decided to go with fresh and bright one more time. Let’s have a meeting after lunch later. I need to eat the beef bone broth I brought. Mom saw somewhere that you hurt your leg again and made it for you.”
“Going to such lengths… Please tell her I’m grateful.”
Moved by Jinyeong’s mother taking care of him like her own son, Jion once again thought his choice last night had been right. When even the members’ families looked after and thought of each other like this, it wasn’t the time to waste energy falling for momentary temptation. Jion went back and forth between the kitchen and refrigerator on his limping leg, organizing what Jinyeong had brought.
“Why are you doing it?”
However, before he had gone back and forth a few times, Seonwoo Jin appeared and took the plastic bottle Jion had been holding from behind. He pulled out a chair for Jion, telling him to sit down, then silently began organizing Jinyeong’s luggage. Jion was relieved to see that the face that had been crying last night after being rejected was gone, replaced by an indifferent expression as if nothing had happened.
“Thanks.”
“Don’t lift heavy things. Your ankle isn’t completely healed yet.”
“Oh my. Like you ever let me before.”
Jinyeong, who had been lying in the living room watching this scene, couldn’t help but butt in and grumble. Seonwoo Jin ignored him without even looking, and Jinyeong snorted as if he hadn’t expected anything different. Then Jinyeong called out to Jion, who was sitting in the chair blankly staring at Seonwoo Jin’s back.
“Hey, hey. Seong Jion. Come here for a sec.”
“Why. Can’t you see my leg hurts?”
“Why do you always act so weak only when Seonwoo Jin is around?”
“When did I… Why.”
At Jinyeong’s scolding remark with disgust, Jion grumbled and got up from his seat. And when he lay down next to Jinyeong, who was sprawled out in a spread-eagle position, Jinyeong glanced sideways to check Seonwoo Jin’s location. After confirming that Seonwoo Jin had his face buried in the refrigerator organizing its contents, Jinyeong quickly lowered his voice and whispered in Jion’s ear.
“You two made up, right?”
“Huh? Uh…”
“Yeah, I could tell you made up from the eyewitness photos and videos anyway.”
“Huh?”
[Guys, trusting that prejudice and showing off that you had sex in public places is a bit much]
Jion flinched as he recalled the sentence he had forgotten.
“It’s that obvious?”
“Of course?”
Jinyeong grinned playfully and pulled the waist of Jion lying next to him into an embrace. Then he pressed his lower abdomen against Jion’s buttocks and shook his body exaggeratedly.
“You were doing this where everyone could see—would that be a fighting relationship? Even if you had a lovers’ quarrel, you wouldn’t go this far during a cold war.”
“Ah, what the hell!”
Jion made a serious face and hit Jinyeong’s arm repeatedly, escaping from his embrace and fleeing onto the sofa. It was truly a skin-crawling contact. Jion vigorously brushed off the places Jinyeong had touched as if a tick, leech, or caterpillar had attached to his body.
“Damn, treating me like a germ.”
“Ah, I really fucking hate it.”
I’m only okay with Seonwoo Jin. Before he knew it, that thought crossed his mind. It wasn’t anything new, so the thought dispersed too quickly, before he could even become aware of it.
