# Chapter 90
Her once neat fingernail fell off with a small pop. Seoyeon was looking at her entire self, trembling in terror.
Soon her fingertips began to rot black. The moment Seoyeon covered her face with her trembling hands, long black nails suddenly sprouted and shredded her vision into pieces.
Seoyeon began to beg Dohyuk.
‘Esper Choi Dohyuk.’
‘Please.’
‘Please kill me.’
‘I’m sorry. I’m sorry. But you know.’
‘I don’t want to remain as a monster.’
‘Please.’
To please let her remain human.
***
‘It’s unfortunate what happened to Esper Lee Seoyeon. I thought she was a success, but apparently not. Was it because she was female and her body was weaker?’
After killing Seoyeon during the mission and returning, Dohyuk was locked in the research facility for three weeks of examination. Soaked in drugs, the memories of what tests he underwent and how are hazy. But it was a rather decent time. Because he didn’t need to think about anything at all.
‘Then how is the condition of Esper Choi Dohyuk, who was created in the same way?’
‘Besides experiencing significant stress, no abnormalities have been detected so far. But he could suddenly rampage like Lee Seoyeon.’
‘My goodness. What on earth is the cause of the rampage?’
‘Looking at how Dohyuk is fine, the cause is unknown. The biggest problem now is that research we thought was successful has been revealed as a failure, so funding has been cut. For now, we’re temporarily suspending the research, and since the atmosphere at headquarters isn’t good…’
Ignoring the voices that murmured past his ears, Dohyuk dozed off with a blank face.
Because he couldn’t sleep all day due to constant nightmares whenever the effects of the drugs wore off even slightly, Dohyuk spent more time dozing in the laboratory. He also became extremely anxious when conscious and sober. Like animals in zoos exhibiting stereotypic behavior, he repeatedly banged his head against hard objects. After the cycle of getting wounded, forming scabs, and growing new skin had repeated about three times, Dohyuk received two “psychological counseling” sessions from a specialist invited by the laboratory.
He couldn’t remember what counseling he had, but ridiculously, everything became miraculously fine after that counseling. It was as if someone had cast a spell. It felt like someone had completely stolen the unbearable memories.
He was dispatched to the Yeongnam region, returned his original phone, and received a new communication device from the research facility. It was an act of openly showing suspicion of Dohyuk and notifying him that they would be monitoring him. Since it was obvious his communications would be tapped, Dohyuk didn’t contact anyone.
It was rather peaceful to justify to himself that he had no choice.
‘But you know.’
‘I don’t want to remain as a monster.’
‘You also want to die as a human, don’t you?’
If he didn’t get greedy, he would never lose anyone again.
***
He gasped like a fish out of water.
Dohyuk hurriedly began to examine his hands, arms, and even shoulders meticulously. Firm and smooth skin. Unchanged skin color.
It was the same as usual. For now, it was still the same as usual.
No, actually, he wasn’t sure.
Is it really exactly the same as usual?
“Huff, hah…”
It felt like being grabbed by the collar by a huge shadow the moment he put his feet outside the bed after waking from a bad dream. Dohyuk, with trembling eyes, looked at the monster in front of him that was suffering and expressing pain just like him.
A fierce appearance with dark green fluid bubbling up like foaming blood. Skin like a hide dyed purple, the color of a corpse. It was a being he had clearly considered a monster without any reservations until just now. But now it felt like facing a giant mirror.
Without realizing it, he kept muttering:
“It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay. Not yet. It’s still okay.”
Suddenly, something incomprehensible whispered coldly into Dohyuk’s mind.
Why doesn’t Agwi attack you? Because you’re the same monster! Monsters don’t attack their own kind, do they? Think about all the monsters that haven’t attacked you until now. The reason you can understand Agwi’s cries is the same.
Feeling his insides churning, Dohyuk hurriedly dry heaved. After coughing up a handful of blood, Dohyuk looked at the darkish color and sighed in relief with a pale face.
“…Shut up. It’s not time yet.”
The faintly laughing voice continued to push meanings into Dohyuk’s mind.
Think about your true nature. You were violent when you were in the facility, weren’t you? Even your parents couldn’t stand you, so they abandoned you. Because you’re a monster. Why do you think you were chosen as a test subject among all those children in the facility? The doctors said it too. That they saw your filthy true nature.
Just as Dohyuk was about to spit out sharp words at that voice, Agwi, who had been stumbling around in confusion, moved with heavy thuds. The sound “krrrr, krrrk” was once again perceived by Dohyuk as having some meaning.
Agwi was in a starved state.
It might be an instinct to recover from severe injuries through consumption. Seeing that it passed by the fragments of the wooden doll it had been eagerly chewing on until just now, Dohyuk strongly felt that there must be something else. Dohyuk hoped it would be Junseo, alive.
This was no time to suffer from the fragments of the past flickering before his eyes. Muttering, “I need to focus,” Dohyuk slashed the back of his hand with his dagger. Along with the sharp pain, bright red blood ran down his wrist and dripped. Only then did he finally feel relief. Monsters don’t bleed.
Dohyuk hurriedly followed Agwi. Each time Agwi took a step, the large footsteps echoed through the cave like an earthquake.
Eventually, it stopped in front of a small spring. The mist that had been faintly spread throughout the nest since they entered was rising from there. Through the mist, the familiar silhouette of someone standing straight like a doll could be vaguely seen. Even with that dim silhouette, he could tell. It was Junseo. His heart pounded violently.
Dohyuk quickly kicked off the ground. Now that he knew where Junseo was, he had to stop Agwi before it snatched Junseo.
But there was someone who moved even faster than Dohyuk.
BOOM!
The air rippled so intensely that even Dohyuk, who was nearby, was swept up.
[GRAAAAAH!]
Unlike Dohyuk, who barely avoided the fierce wave, Agwi, which had been like a target, flew backward with a sonic boom.
Perhaps due to the rippling air, Junseo’s face was clearly visible through the now-cleared mist. Even his sharp gaze, still staring straight ahead while gripping a gun.
“Junseo!”
At Dohyuk’s call, Junseo’s gaze turned toward him. His pupils were hazy, like an Esper who had used their ability to the limit. The protective gear that had been perfectly worn when they departed for the Underground Nation was completely shattered and tattered.
“…Why is hyung here? Is this a dream?”
Although he muttered suspiciously to himself, his eyes, which had been frozen solid while keenly waiting for the slightest opportunity, softened brightly the moment they took in Dohyuk. At the same time, as he staggered greatly and was about to fall into the spring right in front of him, Dohyuk barely managed to support Junseo.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?”
Dohyuk, breathing roughly, touched Junseo wherever he could reach. He focused on examining him, stroking his pale skin, tracing from his nape down to his wrist, looking for any injuries.
Junseo’s elongated eyes traced delicate curves each time Dohyuk’s touch reached him.
“If this is a dream, I’ll cry.”
“It’s not a dream. Definitely not.”
What nonsense are you saying. In a tone suggesting he didn’t even want to imagine such a thing, Dohyuk grumbled, and Junseo took a thin breath.
Eventually, as if he no longer had the strength to grip anything, the crude-looking gun Junseo had been holding fell to their feet with a thud. After confirming there were no noticeable wounds on Junseo’s body, Dohyuk finally turned his gaze to the ground.
“Ah… This was made by Yu Junwoo. I should probably… stop by the lab and return it… The user experience is really terrible.”
Junseo slowly rubbed his head against Dohyuk’s chest and exhaled a long sigh. Though he tried to collect his drooping body by blinking his eyes a couple of times, he ultimately failed, and all of Junseo’s weight fell on Dohyuk. Only after embracing all that weight in his arms did Dohyuk’s labored breathing return to normal.
“But weren’t you being controlled?”
Perhaps noticing Dohyuk trembling slightly, Junseo slowly raised his hand and gently stroked Dohyuk’s back as he continued speaking.
“Before I explain anything else… let’s deal with the monster first. This isn’t an annihilation-type weapon but a temporary incapacitation type…”
Exhaling and venting the emotions that had risen to his Adam’s apple, Dohyuk belatedly nodded.
Seeing that Junseo didn’t even have the energy to stand, Dohyuk lifted him as he was about to slide down to the damp floor. Dohyuk placed him on a dry spot a little distance from the spring.
Soon Dohyuk approached Agwi, who had been slammed into the cave wall. Agwi, with only its eyes bloodshot, showed no reaction to Dohyuk’s approach. As Junseo had said, it seemed truly incapacitated. Dohyuk had never heard of or seen such a weapon. Plus, he couldn’t understand how Junseo, a Guide, was able to launch a physical attack.
But the most important thing was that Junseo was alive. With this one fact alone, Dohyuk didn’t care about anything else.
