Bernard refused to board, but it didn’t go as he wished. Dragged by Rubens’ hand that roughly gripped his forearm, he was shoved into the passenger seat and fastened his seatbelt while trembling. Bernard visibly became unstable and shrank his body even when Rubens’ hand moved up just a little. As if his standing straight, meeting his gaze, and speaking had been an illusion.
“If you’ve experienced all that kind of thing, you should have trauma.”
“Trauma?”
“Shouldn’t you be bringing that person in instead of receiving counseling yourself?”
“That won’t happen.”
“You’re not going to cause another accident somewhere, you piece of trash. Right now, you shouldn’t be coming to the hospital for regular counseling, you should be going to the police to turn yourself in.”
Rubens was watching Bernard while recalling his friend Ebrahim’s words. Ebrahim was his attending physician, working at a famous hospital. It was counseling he had been receiving consistently since childhood due to his parents who thought Rubens’ temperament was violent. The counselor was originally Ebrahim’s father, and Ebrahim, who became a doctor following in his father’s footsteps, had inherited Rubens’ counseling.
Having grown up together since childhood, Ebrahim knew well how sharp-edged and dangerous Rubens was. He was horrified and disgusted by Bernard’s story, but being in a position of receiving massive donations, he ultimately had no choice but to keep his mouth shut.
According to him, Bernard was currently in an extremely unstable state. Rubens glanced through the rearview mirror at him trembling while trapped in an environment that could stimulate his trauma. At least his appearance of speaking with a clear face wasn’t bad. Being burdened by wearing clothes, or being troubled as if he had realized the situation—all of it.
“Because I’m a pathetic idiot who likes you…”
But that face that seemed to accept everything. An attitude that not only faced his emotions and felt ashamed but rather seemed to accept and settle them. That got on Rubens’ nerves.
Rubens drove the car quickly without saying a word. A notification for an unread text message rang on his phone again, but he ignored it. There had originally been one scheduled meeting. It was a meeting to select an investment company, and although there was a report from Dale that the other party was troubled by the unilateral cancellation, he set it aside.
“You seem to be paying too much attention to Weil House.”
“So?”
“It would be better to leave it to Mr. Elliot to some extent…”
Investment, connections, invitations. There was no need for Rubens to personally handle all of that. However, Rubens stepped forward as if everything was his own business, and didn’t find it particularly troublesome. After handling all those matters, he met Bernard.
Each time, Bernard was troubled or thanked him. Sometimes he humiliated the one with the clean face. Or after imprinting the situation he was in, he made him climb into bed, and he liked looking at his body turned entirely red.
Liked? Yes, he had liked it.
The car raced quickly down the road. Because he arbitrarily ignored signals, the sound of horns could be heard from here and there, but he ignored them. After Rubens parked the car in the mansion’s parking lot, he roughly dragged Bernard out again.
Bernard felt as if all the blood in his body had already gone cold. Dragged clattering up the stairs connected to the parking lot, he was thrown onto the bed. Before he could protest anything, Rubens occupied the space above his waist.
“Always, you make me annoyed one thing at a time like this.”
“Ah, that, I, what did I… wh-what…”
Clothes of unknown price were crushed and wrinkled beneath Rubens. Bernard couldn’t come to his senses at all. Because he had repeatedly shrunk his body, startled too much by the breathing Rubens exhaled throughout the drive and the sound of tapping the steering wheel, all his tense muscles ached to the point of pain.
While crumpled in the passenger seat, he thought and thought again about what he had done wrong, why his mood had suddenly changed, but there were too many possibilities. Had he overstepped? Or been presumptuous?
“You love me.”
“No, ah, I’ll stop… I’ll stop.”
“Why?”
Those eyes exactly resembled that day. The day when he had received a call from Rhino and pressed Bernard down in the passenger seat. Rubens, who had struck Bernard’s cheek, was vividly angry, and at that time Bernard was busy trembling and begging for forgiveness. The fear of that moment seemed to flow down from his head to his toes.
“Because it’s not, not right…”
“You’re judging that now?”
“Ugh… but, if Elliot… finds out…”
“As if you care about appearances.”
Because Rubens gripped him as if blocking his mouth, Bernard couldn’t continue speaking. Fear eroded his brain. His lungs expanded rapidly with panting breaths and his heart pounded. He, who had mounted on top of Bernard, kissed his eyes. Bernard blinked rapidly. Tears that had formed at some unknown time flowed down his temples.
“You’re crying.”
The blue eyes curved affectionately. However, in Bernard’s vision, the moment when he raised his hand kept repeating and shattering. With the hand that had blocked his mouth, he wiped away Bernard’s tears. Sticking out his tongue, he tasted the salty flavor on his thumb, then gripped Bernard’s hair.
Bernard was dragged without being able to resist at all. His hair felt like it would all be torn out, so he struggled, grabbing his wrist to try to stop him, but it was useless. Words like “I was wrong,” “I’m sorry,” melted into tears and overflowed.
The place he was roughly thrown was in front of the mirror. Bernard, lying face down, sniffled and crawled slowly in fear. But there was no way he could escape. He bumped his forehead against the mirror and stared blankly at his own face.
“Did my words to wear the ring seem ridiculous?”
“No, it’s not… Someone asked about the ring…”
“Even so, you should wear it.”
“Someone might notice…! I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
Bernard shook his head, but it only resulted in him banging his face against the mirror with thuds. Rubens firmly pressed down on the waist of the prostrate Bernard. Trampled by that weight, Bernard crouched on the floor, preparing for the violence to come. But when was violence ever something one could prepare for?
“It seems you can’t understand words, so shall I help you a bit?”
“Ah, ahhh…”
When he was dragged down by his hair, the blanket that had spilled out together in his struggle was sprawled on the floor. Bernard found his own hand placed on the white blanket unfamiliar. The foot that had firmly stepped on his waist was now placed on top of his hand.
Beneath his shoe, Bernard’s hand was so fragile and seemed like it would break easily. Weight was gradually added to the shoe stepping on Bernard’s hand. Bernard didn’t even dare think of grabbing Rubens’ ankle and didn’t know what to do, fumbling at his own stepped-on hand.
“Think about loving me. Not about withdrawing.”
Crack—a chilling sound was heard. Bernard wriggled like an insect with its wings torn off. The panting breathing grew louder beneath Rubens’ foot, then repeatedly subsided. There was no blood seeping onto the blanket. But it was certain that the bone had broken perfectly.
The shoe twisted as if grinding the broken bone. Bernard’s appearance, sobbing and pouring out tears at that, instigated Rubens’ sinister desire. He laughed while feeling the sensation of crushing beneath his shoe. Watching the vermin-like appearance unable to even cling and crying miserably, he felt his dog-like mood improve a little.
“I was wrong, I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wro—hngh, huu… ngh, wrong. Please. Stop…”
“If you were wrong, you should apologize properly…”
At Rubens’ voice trailing off, Bernard, who had been stuck flat to the floor, jerked his head up. His wide dark green eyes were soaked with tears. His glasses lenses and even his cheeks were all wet, and tears dripping from his chin left wet marks on the blanket.
Bernard tried hard to think about what he should do, what he could do, but he had no idea at all. He wanted to act rationally, but the searing pain seemed to burn and consume his hand. He was afraid. That such violence would come from not wearing the ring was abnormal, but at this moment he didn’t have a gentle enough mind left to protest.
Hadn’t he been thrown into such merciless violence due to the resistance he had shown just moments ago? Bernard cried miserably while trying not to let out sounds. Perpetrators always didn’t like him crying. Rubens watched without stopping him as he struggled to kneel even with his hand stepped on. Was that the right choice? A bit of heat seemed to spread in Rubens’ cold eyes.
Through many experiences, Bernard had vaguely learned something. At times like this, usually doing something he didn’t normally do satisfied the perpetrators. Bernard’s lips trembled. He hesitantly bowed his head, kissed Rubens’ instep, and stuck out his tongue to lick it. His tears flowed down the leather of the shoe.
“Good.”
As if it had been a not-bad choice, the shoe was slowly lifted. Bernard worried that withdrawing his hand too quickly might displease him and slowly withdrew it. He bit the flesh inside his mouth, feeling like a pained moan would keep leaking out. A fishy taste immediately came.
The pain was too strong. Even while thinking the bone must have broken, he couldn’t say he would go home. The ring on his fourth finger was shining brilliantly even in that moment. Rubens, who had been looking down at him unable to even cradle his injured hand and sitting crouched awkwardly on the floor, opened his mouth in an affectionate voice.
“Since we came early, how about having a meal together? Is that all right?”
“My, my hand… my hand…”
“How about having a meal together? Is that all right?”
Bernard only looked up at Rubens like a person whose soul had left. The blue eyes were looking at him with a very warm gaze. However, he couldn’t know how long that gaze would remain warm. A sense of helplessness overwhelmed Bernard.
“Yes…”
In the end, what he chose was obedience. A faint smile spread across Rubens’ face.
