The cell phone was quite useful. At the words that his father had given it to him, Tae Shinwoo didn’t show any particular reaction.
Instead, as if he had been waiting, he sent messages during every class period. Most of them were trivial content.
That he was hungry. That he was bored. That it was tedious.
Seo Eunho’s lips twitched at that trivial content. But the actual reply he sent was,
[Pay attention in class]
Just that firm statement.
Seo Eunho didn’t particularly care how people saw him. But Tae Shinwoo was different. He didn’t want to make people say that Tae Shinwoo was acting strange these days, influenced by him.
While Seo Eunho himself was looking at the blackboard without knowing what class was being conducted, he moved his gaze to his cell phone again.
Very briefly, the favor the teachers had given him quickly disappeared. They were still watching him, but it stemmed from the concern that he might have a bad influence on Tae Shinwoo.
When he wasn’t a person who could have any influence. Everyone, not knowing that, was anxious that Tae Shinwoo might follow him down a bad path.
Amidst indifferent thoughts, the cell phone vibrated again. After sending a message meaning to stop sending them, his lips twitched immediately.
[Won’t you come have dinner today?]
However, it wasn’t from the person he had expected. Seo Eunho skimmed through the message from the woman who had been persistently contacting him for the past few days.
He mostly didn’t answer, and the occasional answers he gave were consistently “No.” Yet despite that, why was she so diligent—the woman kept contacting him endlessly.
He would understand if it were a household with something to gain.
There was nothing in his home. All there was, was whatever was in the pocket of his father, who he didn’t know what he was doing going around.
The small amount of money might be all the assets his father possessed. Thinking about it that way, he might have more money than his father. Since he had the money he received from Tae Shinwoo, at least.
Anyway, there was no reason for the woman to show him this much devotion.
“……”
Seo Eunho tried to ignore the message but then sent a reply saying it was okay.
He wanted to persist in ignoring her, but it was difficult to turn away unconditional favor. He couldn’t tell what kind of person she was, so he couldn’t gauge what attitude he should take either.
Who knows? Maybe she really has lost her mind and wants to play the role of a mother.
A laugh escaped at the ridiculous thought. Even if that were so, she would quit eventually. It wouldn’t take long for his father to throw the woman away.
[I wish class would end quickly]
Around then, the cell phone vibrated with a message from Tae Shinwoo. Seo Eunho smoothed out his slightly contorted face and smiled immediately.
If it was being swayed, he would hate it, but strangely he was willing. There was no separate severe case.
His finger hesitated over the cell phone. The smile had already been erased and it was a rather resolute look. Only after a while did Seo Eunho move his finger to compose a message.
[Me too]
This much should be okay. Even though he poured all his nerves into one insignificant message, it wasn’t very uncomfortable.
He just felt stupid only watching his cell phone, anticipating the message that would come back from Tae Shinwoo.
[Should we just go home as soon as class ends?]
Seo Eunho put force into his lips to hide the laughter about to burst at the returned message. Anyway, he does this whenever there’s an opportunity. As if desperate to play.
It was funny, but Seo Eunho didn’t give any answer. He didn’t want to make him hear this and that just for being associated with him.
He didn’t care, but Tae Shinwoo was different.
The paths that guy and he would take forward were completely different. Seo Eunho would have to barely get through each day, and Tae Shinwoo would continue as he had been until now as an exemplary person, going to college and getting a good job.
Whatever his other side was like didn’t matter. The result was the same anyway.
Therefore, it was better not to leave a bad reputation by being tied to him for no reason.
When the time came, their points of contact would disappear, and the distance between them would gradually widen. Tae Shinwoo to a path befitting him, and Seo Eunho to a path that fit him as well.
It was a bit bitter, but that was reality. To not widen apart, Tae Shinwoo would have to be dragged down. Since he couldn’t climb up. Of course, it was nonsense, and there was no way Tae Shinwoo would make such a choice.
“……”
It was still a story of the distant future, but when it occasionally filled his head, he couldn’t shake it off at all. Perhaps it was because of greed.
Still, it might be hope that maybe, just maybe.
***
The autumn breeze was gradually getting cooler. The weather was ambiguous to wear something over, but cold to wear just one piece of clothing.
Days when breath came out at dawn and it was clear during the day. Cool days continued as if asking when he had been sweating profusely in the sweltering heat.
Normally, he would have been annoyed at the suddenly cold weather. Although he thought cold was better since he hated heat, his own house was so poor that it was extremely uncomfortable whether it was cold or hot.
However, at Tae Shinwoo’s house, there was no need to even care what the outside situation was like. Living in a house that always maintained an appropriate temperature, he didn’t even know what the outside weather was like.
A comfortable house. Half-lying and leaning on the sofa, Seo Eunho was looking at his cell phone, and Tae Shinwoo was looking at Seo Eunho. Seo Eunho pretended not to notice the gaze that kept reaching him.
Both good and bad. It was because he hadn’t yet chosen what reaction to have to the ambivalent feelings.
“Your father again?”
“…Yeah.”
Fortunately, with Tae Shinwoo starting a conversation, Seo Eunho’s worries became useless. His gaze, which moved slowly, turned toward Tae Shinwoo.
To be precise, it wasn’t his father but contact from the woman he had brought, but Seo Eunho didn’t bother to explain.
Since she was a person who would disappear soon anyway, he didn’t feel the need to explain about this person to Tae Shinwoo.
It was also embarrassing. He had never thought it was awkward to talk about his circumstances, but there were times when he wanted to hide it a bit from Tae Shinwoo.
“He’s been contacting you often lately.”
Tae Shinwoo muttered discontentedly. Still, when he said it was contact from his father, the only guy who would say something like that was probably Tae Shinwoo.
“He’ll quit eventually.”
Seo Eunho also answered nonchalantly.
“What’s he saying?”
“To come home.”
“Not to run away from home?”
“No. To eat a meal together.”
“He’s not telling you to come back home?”
“He did, but I said I wouldn’t go.”
Since his father had no interest in him from the start, it was all words the woman had said, but he didn’t particularly care. In fact, he wondered if there was really a need to add that it wasn’t his father but someone else saying it.
“When did he neglect you and now this.”
Seo Eunho laughed at the irritated tone. It was funny because it was something he should say, but Tae Shinwoo was saying it.
“Don’t go.”
“I said I wouldn’t go.”
“No, don’t go to eat either.”
He had no intention of going in the first place, but it was a bit strange that he was emphasizing it crookedly again. Was there something important? While he was thinking, Tae Shinwoo added more words on his own.
“You have to play with me.”
Was he possessed by a ghost who died from not being able to play? Anyway, whenever there’s an opportunity, it’s “let’s play.”
A gaze full of the meaning that it should naturally be so stared intently at Seo Eunho. Sometimes when looking at this Tae Shinwoo, he felt like playing tricks. Such a contrary spirit to want to distort this face would arise.
Seo Eunho didn’t know he would have such thoughts. However, from some point on, it kept becoming like that.
Not because he wanted to upset Tae Shinwoo’s mood, but because he wanted to confirm how much more he wanted to spend time with him. It was probably that.
“I don’t want to.”
At the short refusal, Tae Shinwoo’s face immediately crumpled. Seo Eunho didn’t hold back his bursting laughter. Perhaps knowing that Seo Eunho, who suddenly laughed, had played a trick, Tae Shinwoo also laughed absurdly.
When the time comes, they’ll each go their own way.
Seo Eunho recalled the thought he had just a while ago. He knew it all, but when such time became routine, he kept deliberately turning away from it.
Perhaps even later. They would live different lives, but still, they might be able to spend time together.
Vain expectations gradually swell in size. Right now he was consciously suppressing them, but he didn’t know if he could do so forever.
“I’m not going.”
“Are you sure?”
“Being with you is fun.”
Why does his heart keep changing like this? Is that what liking someone is?
This way then that way. Trying to distance himself then trying to get close. Neither this nor that, is repeating stupid actions the emotion of liking someone?
He didn’t know. Seo Eunho was still immature to define what liking someone meant.
“…Yeah, me too.”
Was there a need to know?
That he was this happy when you smile at his words, that if he could, he always wanted to make it so. Isn’t it enough to just know that?
Therefore, Seo Eunho just wanted to do as Tae Shinwoo wanted. As long as it wasn’t bad for him, anything.
If he told him not to respond to the calls, he could do so as much as needed. Because Tae Shinwoo was more important to Seo Eunho.
Seo Eunho put his cell phone in his pocket and looked at Tae Shinwoo. The gazes that met were entangled for a long time, and the two didn’t exchange any words.
