Though he’d been coming and going from this house for several months, the spaces his feet touched were limited. The garden, living room, bathroom—places he inevitably went in and out of in daily life, or the bedroom where he’d been unavoidably dragged. Those were the examples.
The study was a space that didn’t meet any of those requirements. When he was first dragged to this house and imprisoned, turning the house upside down. That could be called the first and last time entering.
‘It’s okay to go in, right?’
If it were before, he would have hesitated less. Setting aside the fact that heat had risen to the top of his head, it was empty anyway.
The more you examined this place, the more it made you doubt whether it had been used as a ‘house.’ Starting from the high gray walls that made you feel deflated just looking at them and the pitch-black, dried-up ivy.
The garden visible when you opened the entrance and came in was also like a set from a horror movie. Should I say it had the feeling of carrying an ominous story about three generations dying tragically in succession?
Unlike the completely unmanaged exterior, the interior was neat. Except that degree of neatness was excessive. When Saehyeon was first dragged here, there had definitely only been a sofa and bed.
But from a certain point on, things kept being added one by one. Not just furniture and fixtures, of course, but as the people coming and going increased, it had a more human smell. Though the awkward feeling like a model house wasn’t entirely gone. The study was also one of those belatedly filled spaces.
While hesitating, this thought suddenly crossed his mind.
‘If you didn’t want me to enter, you should’ve locked it yourself.’
The front door lock had been installed just fine in reverse, so if he wanted, it seemed he could do the same for the study door. Saehyeon grabbed and pressed down the doorknob that had become lukewarm from being handled so much.
Unlike the long hesitation, the inside was naturally ordinary. Bookshelf, desk, chair. A simple composition. But the quantity of books was more substantial than expected, filling two wall surfaces and then some.
They were all books he was seeing for the first time or looked damn difficult. Saehyeon’s eyes carefully scanned the exposed spines. He stopped at a section almost close to the floor, located at the end of the right corner.
“…They’re really here.”
Because of the position, he naturally ended up half-crouching. Saehyeon carelessly placed his arms or chin on his sharply protruding knees. Then he began staring intently at the scene before him as if it were some mortal enemy.
All achromatic colors, and amidst difficult words mixed up in English or Chinese characters. There were very incongruous things. The background colors were colorful, and even the fonts were round, so they couldn’t help but stand out. If he had to pick one more peculiarity, it was the subject. Those books all shared a common theme.
“Wise Methods for Raising Boys, Our Child’s Development Encyclopedia….”
Following along reading the titles, a hollow laugh escaped through his teeth.
‘I see.’
Just as he had completely lost his memory, Gil Taeseo couldn’t be familiar with child-rearing either. From his speech patterns to his actions, it showed clearly.
He’d get that mature and composed child so worked up that he’d stamp his feet, and his basic posture was roughly picking him up and tucking him under his arm like a bag. But thinking carefully, it was just up to that point.
The child had never truly recoiled and cried, nor had there been any physical injuries.
Considering the physical abilities unique to a dominant alpha, or Gil Taeseo when he’d crushed a neutralized person in an alley under his feet… it was also the result of considerably holding back his strength.
‘I thought you wanted to look at them together, but was that not it?’
It wasn’t. It was news to him that Gil Taeseo had sneakily rummaged through child-rearing books alone, and he’d thought the proposal had been rejected in the one-room last time. If it weren’t a coincidence, he probably would have passed by forever without knowing.
His fingertips, rustling alone even in the humid air, carefully traced the book spines.
Between regions of northern winds and harsh snow wrapped in iron armor, hidden away in a small fairy village, Saehyeon carefully pulled out one or two residents.
‘He went on about whether I wanted to say such things to trash like himself.’
Wasn’t he already ahead of him? It felt like being deceived by that sneaky bastard and getting scammed again.
***
The closed door opened at a late hour. Considering the sensitive homeowner’s five senses, all the hinges were smoothly oiled. But as if avoiding any possible disturbance, the door opened extremely carefully.
“……”
And for a while, no sound was heard. Making the carefully opened door meaningless, the man just stood there looking inside. Looking at his actions alone, you’d think there was a high and solid barricade instead of a shallow threshold. With a brief silence in between, he stepped inside with large strides.
Now that there was no need to match pace with anyone, the man’s stride was very wide and fast, so reaching the bed was quick.
Dense silence was perfect for maximizing other senses. Especially sight, smell, and hearing.
Right in front, right next to the bed. Lee Saehyeon was sitting in a strange posture, whether half-lying or sitting in a chair. The sharp alpha’s eyes scanned the child on the bed, the book placed on his knee, and the lamp on the desk in turn. The man, who’d tilted his head and observed for a moment, reached out and turned off the lamp. The surroundings, deprived of even the weak light source, instantly became pitch dark. The cozy-looking atmosphere also vanished without a trace. That was one of the things the man intended.
Secretly stealing a look at the stillness of a sleeping person in the dim darkness was both pathetic and addictive.
‘Did I say I’d turn on the light?’
Gil Taeseo recalled again the words the other person had spat out with a pale face several months ago. Looking clearly like prey trembling from having its nape bitten wrong or something, he’d said such things well.
He no longer feared the darkness. Of course, he’d become a human specimen unsuited for being under the sunlight. It was because he’d learned that without light, he could pretend not to see the things he’d lost. Things like empty palms or a side without warmth, for example.
What was scary wasn’t the trauma that ruthless humans had given him in his youth or anything like that. Repeatedly realizing what he’d lost and what he would lose was something bone-chilling.
So the darkness and stillness that he’d so detested before, he was now taking as opportunities.
“…You’ll break your neck doing that.”
The man spat out words and reached out his hand. It was an excessively low, suppressed voice for waking someone. In terms of awakening effect, the fingertips that had become cold, stained by the dawn air, seemed to have some effect. The dry hand flinched slightly, and Saehyeon wrinkled his peaceful eyebrows slightly.
The hand that had hesitated for a moment moved away. When it returned not long after, it held a slightly lukewarm warmth. As if deliberately warming the hand so as not to startle.
The slowly moving fingers traced the face before him. Round forehead, deeply sunken eye sockets, still gaunt cheeks, and dry, rough lips.
When the fingertips that had lingered particularly long on the lips fell away, a small sigh escaped into the air. A very small sound whose origin couldn’t be distinguished.
“Are you asleep?”
The man’s hand picked up the book that had been lying on the knee. The cover garishly colored in various hues was definitely not unfamiliar. Like an earthbound spirit that only circles designated spots, he wouldn’t even think of entering the study. He didn’t know what wind had blown. That statement in the one-room last time too.
Gil Taeseo, who’d tidied up the book and put it down next to the lamp as if he’d never hesitated, reached out his hand again. Skillfully digging between the chair and body, he lifted just like that. Hooking his arms behind the prominent shoulder blades and slender backs of knees, the thin body easily came up.
‘Wicked bastard.’
Gladly embracing that warmth, Gil Taeseo chewed harsh words inside. Even knowing that willingly being held and this degree of distance were only possible in situations he couldn’t refuse, his chest tightened. As the wheezing breath touched his nape, signals naturally came to his lower body too.
‘No different from a dog in heat.’
Barely just a few steps. Even that was distance created by circling around the bed. The spot right in front of the chair was occupied by the child. It seemed he’d put the child to sleep and dozed off alone while reading.
The series of processes of pulling back the sheets and putting down the body in his arms was very swift and precise. But even after putting down the body, the man didn’t easily raise himself. Casting a large shadow over the defenseless person lying down, he just remained there.
‘…Fuck. I should’ve just gone for the book as soon as I came in.’
Saehyeon’s Adam’s apple secretly bobbed slightly.
