Following the pitiful-eyed skilled interrogator, I was stuck with the unfair accusation of being an inconsiderate person, and I stared at Rashanin in disbelief. But he didn’t care and bent slightly at the waist, lightly touching his cheek to mine.
I knew it was a Western-style greeting, but my soul just slipped out.
Even seeing me frozen like ice, Rashanin let out a light laugh, then stepped back a few steps and buried himself in the darkness. And he disappeared without a trace.
I stared blankly at the curtain fluttering in the night breeze coming through the half-open window before finally coming to my senses. It felt unreal. I’d definitely had a long conversation with Rashanin, but now I even doubted whether he’d been here.
The hospital room door hadn’t even opened… Where did this vampire go?
“Good grief…”
I sighed and rubbed the cheek where Rashanin’s cheek had touched.
“For an ordinary Korean man, this is a bit of an error.”
I kept sighing. What kind of calamity is this to wake up to? As I was cursing the unscrupulous vampire in my mind, I heard a small snoring sound from behind me. Just in case, I glanced back, and sure enough, Seong-jin was sleeping on the cot. Looking at Seong-jin sleeping obliviously to the world, I let out a laugh.
I thought that Seong-jin, who kept missing the distinguished guest he’d been waiting for right under his nose each time, might be just as unlucky as me.
* * *
In life, there are bound to be unlucky days.
And it wasn’t uncommon for those unlucky days to continue for two days in a row.
One was the vampires having a huge fight in the lobby of a 6-star hotel, two was getting hurt while caught up in that fight, three was my phone breaking beyond repair in the midst of it all, four was getting chewed out by my superior who came all the way to my hospital room because of the previous reasons, and five was being unable to leisurely lie in a hospital room on sick leave despite being injured because of work.
Of the five misfortunes that occurred from Friday to Saturday morning, the most unfair was definitely the sick leave. If it weren’t for work, I would have cheerfully rolled around in the hospital bed all weekend. It was a single private room, and Elisabeth’s side was covering all the costs, so there was no need to worry about money. The translation work had also just been finished last week, so I was free.
However, I had outside work on Saturday afternoon. I had to go all the way to Ansan as a guarantor for a vampire who was moving. I tried to replace myself with another agent, but the vampire in charge got angry, saying it had to be me, so I couldn’t.
Since I had no wounds other than a big bump, after hearing the doctor’s advice not to give my head any shocks, I was able to be discharged.
As soon as I was discharged, I headed straight to a phone store. My phone was smashed to pieces. Not only was the screen cracked, but it wouldn’t turn on either. The store said it would be cheaper to buy a new one than to repair it. My 2-year contract had completely ended, and with the store’s strong recommendation, I ended up with the latest smartphone in my hand.
Thirty minutes later, as soon as it was activated, I confirmed a text saying I’d left my credit card at the store and to come pick it up. That was the sixth misfortune. And the seventh misfortune was that even though I wanted to run back to the store right away to exchange it, I’d already gotten on the bus going to the house where the vampire was moving.
“Good grief.”
I sat on the rattling bus and let out a sigh as I confirmed my eighth misfortune. On the large 5-inch screen was a list of people who had contacted me while my phone was off.
From the point I turned off my phone at Deoksugung Palace, my stepmother alone had called seventeen times in a row, a total of 55 calls before activation. Calls had come in even late at night and at dawn.
She really was a relentless person.
Did she really need money that badly? Otherwise, there was no reason to call so persistently. I thought about the reason, then shook my head.
My stepmother disliked me. She didn’t treat me terribly mean like stepmothers in fairy tales. She didn’t curse or hit me, and didn’t greatly discriminate in what I ate or wore compared to my younger siblings. But the invisible discrimination, disregard, indifference, and coldness made me realize that I wasn’t her real son but a bothersome burden.
I remember it was in the 6th grade of elementary school. It was spring and it had rained briefly during the day. On the way home from school, my foot got stuck in a puddle of muddy water and my shoes got wet. I came home hoping she wouldn’t be there because I was afraid of getting scolded by my stepmother, and as I wished, no one was home.
Father had been away on a regional business trip for two weeks. And my stepmother liked to go here and there, and my younger siblings went to academy. I was used to entering an empty house with no one to welcome me. I quickly cleaned my shoes, did my homework, and waited for my family to return. I was hungry, but I had to endure it because my stepmother hated me rummaging through the refrigerator without permission.
It was well past 9 o’clock when my stepmother and two younger siblings returned. Having attended my younger sister’s piano competition, they had already eaten dinner outside. My stepmother, all dressed up, held a certificate announcing my younger sister’s second place with her hand wearing a sparkling jeweled ring and just kept smiling, not caring at all that I had been waiting without eating dinner.
It would be a lie if I said I wasn’t hurt. But I already knew then that crying or shouting wouldn’t change anything. I casually congratulated my younger sister on her prize, and got permission from my stepmother, who was in a good mood, to eat the bread in the refrigerator, filling my hungry stomach.
That’s how I learned to judge people. The other person’s words and actions were the standard for knowing how they thought of me. Whether consciously or unconsciously, I examined and chose. Naturally, I couldn’t become deeply close with other people either. One thing I realized while doing so was that people don’t easily change unless it’s really necessary.
It was clear that my stepmother, who didn’t like me, was persistently contacting me like this for a reason that wasn’t good.
As Rashanin said, it seemed like the time had come to make a decision resolutely without lingering attachment. It wasn’t impossible to change my phone number. The change procedure was a bit complicated, and there were a bunch of bothersome tasks like having to personally contact people here and there to tell them my phone number had changed.
If you set your mind to it, connections can be severed too. Even if it’s not easy, if you don’t see them and don’t hear their voice, you just become someone who occasionally comes to mind. Like an ex-lover.
I reflexively thought of Huijeong and chuckled. Right after we broke up, I thought about her all day, but now she only comes to mind when there’s some trigger. It was the result of not contacting her once and trying not to hear anything from people who could tell me about her.
Anyway, another misfortune was not being able to change my number right away. After applying to transfer my number, I had to wait until permission from higher-ups came through. If there was no special reason, I could receive a rejection, and it also took about a month.
Then to change the number would cost money again, so that was also a misfortune.
I wondered whether to just endure without changing it, but still pulled myself together and registered my stepmother’s number as spam. Even doing this, she was someone who would contact me from a different number anyway, but this was mental preparation.
I continued to check what had been contacted during my absence. Fortunately, there was nothing from the vampires I managed. Five calls from the department head, three calls from a strange number that was probably Manuel, two advertisement calls, and one call from an unknown number. The time was 3 AM. The area code was 032. Incheon.
All the vampires I was managing lived in the Seoul-Gyeonggi area. Just in case, I made a call and it was a motel. When I said I was looking for someone who called at 3 a.m., they told me they had already left.
I couldn’t think of anyone even when I tried to guess who it was, and since the bus had arrived at its destination, I just scratched my head and let it go.
Six hours later, I didn’t think at all that I would regret for a long time not answering that mysterious call.
*
Following the sign that read “Funeral Hall,” I went down the basement stairs where Jinchul sunbae was waiting at the entrance. Seeing me, sunbae couldn’t hide his gloomy face.
“Sunbae.”
“You came quickly.”
“Is it true?”
“Yeah. It’s true. Go offer some incense first. Let’s talk after that.”
“But.”
“He’s really dead. I confirmed his face myself. It’s Namsu.”
At the words that it was Namsu, my mind went blank.
“H-how…”
I couldn’t believe that Namsu was dead. Even while coming to the funeral hall, I thought something was wrong. But it’s real. That guy died in a traffic accident. And in Incheon of all places.
As soon as I heard from Jinchul sunbae that Namsu had died in Incheon, I remembered the call that came from the 032 area code at 3 a.m. Could that have been Namsu? No way. No way. Even thinking it couldn’t be, my heart wouldn’t calm down.
“Go say your last goodbye.”
Led by Jinchul sunbae, I entered the incense offering area where Namsu’s portrait photo was placed. While offering incense and bowing, my mind was just blank. He’s really dead? Could it be he really called me? With a dazed mind, I bowed to the chief mourner and came out. In the dining area, I saw a few college classmates and sunbaes. I greeted them with my eyes and sat at the table where Jinchul sunbae was. Besides Jinchul sunbae, Gyeongsu sunbae was also seated. It seemed he had drunk a lot; as I approached, the smell of alcohol hit me strongly.
“That fucking bastard. He should’ve at least paid back the money before dying.”
Gyeongsu sunbae cursed while gulping down alcohol. Among the four people who had invested in Namsu, the sunbae who had taken the biggest hit had become a credit defaulter and had only recently recovered.
“Really, human life goes so easily.”
“I thought I’d grab him by the collar and fight, did you ever imagine we’d see each other here?”
Jinchul sunbae and Gyeongsu sunbae each said a word while pouring alcohol. Namsu was a same-age classmate. We were close enough that I invested in his business. Even now, if I close my eyes, I can recall Namsu’s face. I couldn’t believe that he had died and I was here at his funeral hall. Even while responding to sunbae’s words, it somehow didn’t feel real.
