The man loved crushing his body against the cruise. Whenever he had time, he would drag Woonghee around and rub skin against skin wildly, spraying pheromones stickily.
So he was very displeased with the recent increase in outings. …It’s probably because of that blond-haired bastard, right?
Busy with public and private matters, as soon as he returned to the cruise, he hastily searched for Woonghee first. Today too, he pounced on Woonghee who was in front of the fire in the dining room. It was truly a kiss as if he would devour him whole.
“Mmph, mmh, mmph…!”
His tongue was so large for his build that it practically stabbed all the way to his throat. Woonghee was pushed against the wall without even being able to turn off the fire. Drip, drip, bright red broth flowed from the tip of the ladle.
“Mm, Woonghee-ssi cooks well.”
Huh, Woonghee rolled his eyes and was suspicious. What’s gotten into this man to give compliments?
“But what is this? Is it a human eyeball?”
He tapped something with a spoon, tap tap. It was an ordinary fish eyeball.
“…No way, it’s a fish eyeball. It’s spicy fish stew.”
Woonghee then shushed him in case someone else might hear. After that, he gently scooped out the fish eyeball with the ladle and tossed it into the trash can, plop. Sizzle, the fish eyeball stretched out with the sticky moisture.
“Ah…”
He saw his lips muttering that it’s a fish. Woonghee glared at him while holding the ladle in one hand. Seriously, that bewitching human. It’s because that human keeps acting like that that even his own common sense is being destroyed along with it.
After sucking on Woonghee’s lips almost like an appetizer, he finished off the spicy fish stew. Then he obediently took the medicine that Woonghee personally prepared for him. Even though all he did was open the medicine packet and place it on his palm, the man smiled very happily.
“I like what Woonghee-ssi gives me the most.”
Is that something to smile so strangely about while taking psychiatric medication? Anyone watching would think he was doing drugs.
After taking that medicine, the man would bathe. He would melt his mind in the warm water and fall asleep. He knows it’s not good to depend on medicine for sleep, but for him, it seemed unavoidable.
“It was hard today too, having to endure that crazy old man rampaging.”
Saying he was very tired, the man slowly took off his suit. He shook his tie and pulled it down smoothly, and unfastened his shirt buttons. The moment his broad shoulders with hard muscles clinging to them were revealed, Woonghee unconsciously let out an exclamation of admiration.
“Ah…”
The man rolled his eyes. Muttering, “How lustful.”
Soon his broad back was sucked into the bathtub filled with hot water. There seemed to be some blood spatters on his latissimus dorsi, but Woonghee pretended not to see it.
His body immersed in the bathtub with an apple scent was very unbalanced. The sight of an overwhelmingly huge body that could be used as a human weapon, slumped languidly with sweet-scented pheromones plastered all over his body.
“Come here.”
He extended his long arm and reached out his hand to him. Drip, drip, water fell from his thick arm. Woonghee sat straddling the bathtub rim with his knees submerged. The man naturally buried his face in Woonghee’s crotch. Without spreading his thighs apart, very comfortably as if lying down with a knee for a pillow on the floor.
“…You look tired.”
Slumped with his cheek crushed against Woonghee’s thigh, he really did look exhausted. No, it seemed like he had barely managed to catch his breath thanks to Woonghee.
“It’s the punishment for recklessly cracking heads.”
“Did something happen…”
Haha, the man laughed lightly with his lips buried in Woonghee’s thigh. Along with a low laugh, the tip of his lips touched lightly, lightly.
“Is today the first day I’ve cracked heads?”
“…Even so.”
There was no need to go that far, Woonghee muttered quietly.
Aren’t you a man who can handle things quietly at any time?
Well, whether it’s grimly smashing skulls with bricks in back alleys, or kidnapping without anyone knowing, pulling out all the fingernails and then poking with needles.
Anyway, ruthlessly smashing heads so arrogantly in a public place wasn’t the man’s way. It was too public, had no secrecy, and evidence was overflowing.
That’s probably why he keeps getting harassed by that old man like that. Judging by the signs, the old man seemed to be his father.
“What exactly is the problem, your love is too strange.”
“…I wonder, is my genes the problem?”
Intoxicated by the medicine, he gradually became more talkative. He seemed to sway slowly like sticky glue.
“My father was also a person crazy about love.”
He crushed his nose as if to smell the scent of the crotch, and as if he would immediately burrow into Woonghee’s hole. Woonghee now knew that this was the man acting cute.
“He noticed right away. That his only son was strange.”
“……”
“Because mother was about to go crazy thinking I wasn’t normal, father punished me mercilessly.”
Does that make sense?
Where is there a father who worries about his wife, who is heartbroken seeing her son’s broken mental world, before his sick son? He even punished him. With such parents, it might have been better not to have them at all.
“He locked me up with a dead swan.”
“Ah…”
Woonghee covered his mouth with his hand. So surprised, so shocked that a gasp burst out. His white toes submerged in the warm water also curled up like fists.
…S-swan, didn’t he say he cherished it?
“He told me to open my eyes wide and watch clearly what kind of thing I had done.”
Perhaps his mental illness was a seed his father gave him. Since he grew in soil that reeked, it might have been a foregone conclusion that he would grow into an abnormal sprout.
“I was watching it decompose. The rotting smell vibrated everywhere.”
“……”
“The eyeballs rotted inward, and maggots swarmed in the brain. It felt like at any moment, the swan with half its head blown off would open its eyes and glare at me.”
I think that’s when I developed mysophobia.
The man smiled broadly, raising the corners of his mouth as if telling an interesting story. That smile looked so twisted.
“From then on, I guess I came to hate dirty things like crazy.”
Right, that’s why.
That’s why this man found that injured white bird unclean, and was frozen as if all the blood had drained from his body the moment the old woman grabbed his forearm.
“……”
Woonghee hesitated. Because he couldn’t find any words of comfort. There were no words of comfort contained anywhere in his dull mind. He just fidgeted with his fingers and then gently removed the hair hanging over his handsome forehead one by one.
“…Gi Junhyuk-ssi, please sleep.”
Don’t keep recalling bad memories, cover up what’s already passed. He only patted his shoulder and spoke quietly.
But his shoulder muscles, which should have been melting loosely, were tensed hard.
“You’ll be gone again, won’t you?”
He glared sharply as if he would scratch Woonghee with his toenails. Though that couldn’t be, he also looked as if frightened. Was it because he heard the story of when he was a child?
“No, I’ll stay by your side.”
Liar. The man sneered coldly. His lips slowly condemned the liar.
“Really.”
“Why?”
The corners of his eyes opened triangularly.
“Because I’m pitiful?”
“……”
“Ah, because I talked about my father, I look pitiful to you?”
The tone in which he spat that out was terribly alien. As if he had finally found the right answer, the man even seemed to be delighted.
“You like pitiful things.”
Woonghee felt like making an excuse, but he was terribly inarticulate. Fuck, I should have developed some social skills…
You should be taking medicine too at that level, it’s very pathological, he rambled. His speech became increasingly slow and slurred. Woonghee gently soothed him. Like calming and putting Woongju to sleep.
His wet lips opened languidly, and his breathing gradually stretched out peacefully. They were really nice-looking lips. Woonghee suddenly had that thought. That he wanted to kiss those lips.
“Why do you want to stay by my side?”
Like a fish gasping for the last time, his voice barely leaked out. Woonghee gently cupped his cheeks.
“…Because I love you.”
Woonghee leaned down and whispered quietly in his ear.
He, who had only focused on survival, on just enduring this life, began to desire something. This was more craving than hope.
He wanted to touch his hair, wanted to comfort him, wanted to kiss him.
He had become tamed by the love he gave. The man wasn’t the only one who newly realized emotions. He had jumped into Woonghee’s life, which had been wandering the back alleys like a lost bastard dog. It was an appearance as chaotic as a monster.
Nevertheless…
“I hope those words were real.”
“……”
“Woonghee-ssi, I hope there was a moment when you were sincere to me.”
“…I’m sincere.”
Woonghee wanted to split open his belly and devour all his emotions like eating his guts. No, he had already chewed and swallowed everything. It smelled, was filthy and a mess, but it would become nutrients.
He couldn’t attach the word eternal to it, but at least at this moment, he loved him. The man smiled slowly.
Someday this man will abandon me. But he decided not to be sad, regretful, worried, or remorseful about it already.
Because originally, all things in the world are bound to be discarded when they become useless.
“What about Gi Junhyuk-ssi? Are you sincere to me?”
No matter how crazy a bastard he was, Woonghee had given his heart. It was shitty, but it couldn’t be helped.
“…I always am.”
Exhaling words like a sigh, he fell into sleep. Woonghee kissed the forehead of the sleeping him. Determined to stay by his side, to be with him as long as he wanted.
