What even is this? Teaching such simple phrases in such contrived situations? And what’s with these grammar points? Why are they so boring?
Thinking about it, I had never taught anyone before. Even though I’d done plenty of presentations at school, that was a completely different matter from teaching. Sure, I’d been taught before, but I’d never been to a tutoring academy or anything. Maybe one-on-one private tutoring with foreigners would be different.
If I had to compare, it would be most similar to high school foreign language classes. At the school I attended, we learned French, German, and Spanish as foreign languages, and I’d chosen French without much thought. Since there were almost no students who didn’t know the basics, students who needed basics learned separately after school, and during class time we studied using a French version of a young adult novel that was a bestseller at the time as our textbook. So even if I drew on that experience, there wasn’t really anything I could reference for my current situation.
In the end, I watched several sample lectures online and asked the academy to let me observe some classes of other successful instructors before starting my own lectures. Really, nothing was easy.
Time truly flowed like water without me even being conscious of it, and I had to greet Jukyung coming home from work again with textbooks and my laptop scattered everywhere in a total mess.
“Are you starting some kind of huge business?”
Jukyung said with an incredulous expression.
“Seeing how you’ve spread everything out, I guess you decided to do it?”
When he asked while looking at the textbooks I’d brought home, I just nodded. On the day I came back from the interview, I’d already told Jukyung that it would probably take longer than expected to pay back the money. I thought he’d make a huge fuss, but Jukyung just nodded with his usual indifferent expression. He said it didn’t matter how long it took, as long as I kept my promise to pay back double.
Only now did I feel newly appalled at how viciously high an interest rate “double” was, but on the other hand, I also thought that if I succeeded as a star instructor, somehow I could manage double. He’d also said it didn’t matter how long it took to pay back, so in a pinch I could just extend it to 5 or 10 years. So I just nodded without much resistance. After all, if I said no now, he might tell me to hand over the card right away and get out.
Before going to sleep, Jukyung emphasized out of the blue that I needed to spend money sparingly.
“I’m already spending sparingly without you telling me.”
How much more should I scrimp? They said if my health deteriorated and I ended up at the hospital it would actually be a minus, so I’d quit convenience store food. I couldn’t quit completely since I’d discovered the taste of ramen, but I was holding back to eating it about once a week. Other than that, two coffees a day and buying breakfast-slash-lunch was it. Jukyung prepared dinner himself.
“Up until now you were alone so there wasn’t much to spend on, but now you’re meeting people. Don’t go around hanging out extravagantly like before and paying for everything everywhere you go.”
“…I won’t.”
Did he think I was that thoughtless?
“So what I mean is….”
Even though I said I got it, Jukyung strangely kept going on.
“Even if someone offers to buy you coffee or a meal, don’t accept it, and don’t buy for them either. Like… fellow instructors you work with, or students…”
Even in the darkness with the lights off, I stared at Jukyung in disbelief. I mean, fine about buying for others, but why can’t I accept treats? With all the money I’ve scattered around the world until now, shouldn’t I be allowed to accept at least that much?
“Why can’t I accept treats either? You’re the one telling me to save money.”
“Hey, where in the world is there a free lunch? If you accept treats, naturally you’ll have to buy for them in return as reciprocation. If it keeps going round and round like that, it becomes a vicious cycle. And there won’t be just one or two people doing that. If you’d completely paid off your debt, I wouldn’t care how much you spent on whom. But while you’re in debt, you should save every penny and pay me back first.”
“……”
Well, that was true. But still, telling me not to socialize at all was too much, wasn’t it? When I’d just started working to pay back the money, did he have to say such things?
Thinking he really was an unlucky bastard, I burrowed into the blanket feeling sullen. The cold air touching the skin exposed outside the blanket felt chilly. Actually, this was also a complaint.
“At least turn off the air conditioner. Don’t you care about the electric bill?”
I grumbled. Kwon Jukyung didn’t bat an eye.
“The electric bill is paid by me, not you. I can’t sleep when it’s hot. If I can’t sleep, my condition becomes terrible the next day, so it’s actually a loss. What’s the problem with me spending my money for my own convenience?”
Kwon Jukyung said annoyingly while pulling the blanket up over his neck. I was dumbfounded. Then why cover yourself with the blanket like that?
September was just around the corner, but the weather was still sweltering. I didn’t have a problem with turning on the air conditioner itself. The problem was that Kwon Jukyung insisted on especially strong cooling only at night.
Honestly, Jukyung didn’t usually seem to be particularly sensitive to heat at other times. When I occasionally raised the temperature or turned off the air conditioner completely because I didn’t like excessive cooling, he said nothing. But specifically when it was time to sleep, it felt like he turned the air conditioner stronger than usual. When people fall asleep their body temperature drops, so normally you’d turn it lower when sleeping, right? You’d even set a sleep timer so it turns off midway.
But instead he made the cooling even stronger, so I’d unknowingly roll toward Jukyung’s side while sleeping. Actually, that was the real problem more than the air conditioner. When I was about to fall asleep it was just the right comfortable level, but once I fell asleep and my body temperature dropped, it became subtly cold, so unconsciously I’d burrow toward the warm spot. For a while, I was so on edge worrying that I might cling to Jukyung again in my sleep seeking warmth, and that picky Kwon Jukyung would find out and make a huge fuss.
But no matter how careful I was, once I fell asleep, I couldn’t help unknowingly clinging to the human heater because I was cold. Just two days ago, I’d opened my eyes in the morning plastered against Jukyung’s back. I felt Jukyung also half-wake up and turn to look back, but still half-asleep, I couldn’t grasp the situation and just fell back asleep in that state.
Honestly, given Kwon Jukyung’s personality, it seemed like he should have kicked me off with his foot while throwing all sorts of fits about why I was clinging to him so disgustingly, but he was just quiet. No, was he just quiet? It seemed like after staring at me for a moment like that, he raised the air conditioner temperature and carefully covered me with the blanket up to my chin. I was sleepy so I just stayed still at the time, but thinking about it later, it was really strange. Did I look that cold? Did he feel sorry for me?
That didn’t seem to be it, seeing how he still stuck to the low air conditioner temperature the next day too. Maybe the day before, he wasn’t actually staring at me out of pity but was contemplating whether or not to strangle me.
***
Anyway, summer didn’t have much time left, so I wouldn’t have to worry about such pathetic problems for much longer either. While wrestling with the class textbooks, only about three days of August remained. My first lecture was coming up next week. At a time when I would normally have gone out for a walk in light clothing, I left the house in slightly more carefully chosen attire. It was because I’d arranged to observe a senior instructor’s class at the academy.
The academy location was a bit far to walk but somewhat ambiguous to use transportation. Buses and subways were still a bit inconvenient, and taxis didn’t really appeal to me either. I decided to walk leisurely while getting some exercise. Walking along with a cool iced americano wasn’t bad at all. It was still quite hot, but when fall came soon the leaves along the roadside would turn, and then it wouldn’t be bad for walking around.
“Wow, the front desk staff were making a fuss about a handsome instructor coming, and it’s true. I was only half-listening.”
I met the senior instructor whose class I’d be observing in the instructor’s room. He was a man in his late twenties with a good-natured face who smiled. He introduced himself as Derek, and from what I heard, he was a Korean-American. Did they just use English names for introductions at the academy? I’d just used my real name even at Leroy, so I didn’t have a separate name.
“I’m Kang Doyun.”
I gave my name while shaking the hand he offered.
“Ah, you’re using your real name? Students might find it a bit hard to call you.”
Was that an issue? I tilted my head.
“Foreign friends just called me Yoon too. It’s fine.”
Derek nodded with a smile and checked the time.
“Class is about to start so I should go in. This is my last morning class, so let’s have lunch together and chat after it ends?”
“Ah, yes.”
Because Derek gestured somewhat hurriedly, I answered a bit flustered. And as I followed him out, I realized—oh no. Kwon Jukyung’s curse came to mind. Don’t accept treats or buy for others.
But no matter how I thought about it, it didn’t make sense. How could I refuse when a colleague and senior from the same workplace was even letting me observe and asking to eat together? When Kwon Jukyung was in school, it seemed like he had a group he hung out with and was fine, so maybe he unknowingly had some issues with interpersonal relationships?
Even if I got nagged later, I decided that since I was receiving help with the class observation, I should at least buy lunch. And I was still clueless about academy life, so I desperately needed a colleague I could get close to who would be helpful.
***
“You ate out?”
“……”
There was no comment during dinner, so I thought it would just pass. Even while he was reading his book in the living room and I was preparing for class, there was no word, but then when we lay down in bed to sleep, he brought it up. Is this also perhaps a habit of his? Always voicing some complaint in bed.
First, I exercised my right to remain silent. That phrase “You ate out?” probably didn’t simply mean “You bought lunch today.” It meant “Despite me telling you not to, you bought someone a meal with the debtor’s card while being in debt to the creditor.”
The class observation was really helpful. It was very different from what I’d vaguely thought or imagined just watching online lectures. Even while eating at a good restaurant near the academy, Derek, knowing I had no instructor experience, gave me lots of useful tips. As a token of gratitude, I paid for the meal which was only a few bucks, and Derek insisted he couldn’t just accept a free meal from a newcomer and bought coffee.
I would have bought lunch and coffee by myself anyway, so at most I’d spent a few thousand won more. Rebellion surged up to my throat, but I swallowed it down for now. Kwon Jukyung had only pointed out the fact that I’d eaten out, but hadn’t criticized me yet.
