Bernard urgently gripped Rubens’s forearm. At the applied force, Rubens shut his mouth for a moment. Rhino was looking at Rubens with a gaze as if interrogating him. At that, Rubens examined the two, then made an immediate judgment. With a cleanly smiling face, he bowed his head and affectionately kissed Bernard’s temple.
“Your expression isn’t good.”
“……I feel a bit unwell.”
“Oh dear. Did I overwork you too much yesterday, Elliot?”
At Rubens’s mischievous joke, the people around let out light laughter. Jeers of “too much” and several people blushing. Bernard nearly let out a pathetic hiccup at the worry spreading in Rubens’s blue eyes. He blinked rapidly to settle his insides.
“It’s not that. There’s someone I know, so may I go get some air for a moment?”
“Don’t go far. I’m worried.”
Rhino was quietly listening to their conversation. Even though he’d greeted first, Rubens’s behavior of not even giving a response should have been unpleasant, but he remained still as ever. Bernard quickly exchanged glances with Rhino and smiled awkwardly.
Soon Bernard, wearing a sociable smile, gave slight eye greetings to the people around. Setting down his champagne glass on the table, he left his seat. Rubens’s gaze stuck thickly to Rhino’s back as he followed after.
Only then did he remember who it was. It was a face he’d encountered at the university. The atmosphere from that time when he’d been openly wary of him came to mind.
[Rubens]: Watch carefully.
Rubens leisurely took out his phone and left a text. It was a text sent to the bodyguards loosely stationed around. He soon responded with smiles to people approaching to talk. The topics were mainly about recent business and Elliot. Rubens calmly nodded while looking at those who knew nothing.
***
Rhino hastily caught Bernard, who had moved to a place with few people.
“Wait. Wait a moment.”
It was a party he’d attended because he was told to inherit the business so he should gradually earn his keep. The necktie choking his neck was unpleasant, but he couldn’t roughly loosen it either, so he’d planned to quietly fill his seat and then leave, when at that moment, people appeared at the party. Rhino doubted his eyes at first. Bernard at this kind of place, at a party with that Rubens? Rhino’s insides rotted.
“Bernard.”
“It’s Elliot.”
“……Right, Elliot. What are you doing here?”
Don’t talk bullshit. Those words rose to his throat, but seeing Bernard looking at him with a desperate expression, he couldn’t spit them out and just obediently swallowed them.
Bernard carefully examined Rhino’s face. He’d thought he could safely pass as a stand-in this time too, but if someone who knew him saw, was he unmistakably Bernard? His spirits dampened a bit.
“I was invited to the party.”
“I know. You must have been. But you know that’s not my question.”
“What are you doing here yourself? Not even replying to my messages.”
Reflexively, words in a resentful tone burst out. When Bernard looked with an ‘oh no’ expression, Rhino fell silent. Bernard’s gaze that had slid down stopped again at Rhino’s tie pin.
“……Coming with such a stupid tie pin.”
“You remember?”
“I gave it to you.”
“Right. That’s why I wore it. I liked it.”
“It’s terrible though.”
Bernard’s mumbled words contained belated embarrassment. A smile spread across Rhino’s seriously hardened face.
It was a tie pin Bernard had gifted after diligently saving his allowance. When Rhino invited him to come to his birthday party, it was a gift he’d chosen with difficulty, inwardly delighted. But after going to Rhino’s party, Bernard keenly realized that he and Rhino were truly different people.
Loud party music, balloons floating here and there, and catering service food hanging all over. Well-dressed people gathering in various groups and laughing. And at the center was Rhino. Everyone seemed desperate to talk to him, and seeing the most popular girl at school, dressed up more splendidly than ever, approach him to talk, he thought. That he’d come to a place he shouldn’t be.
Bernard had tried to quietly leave. But the one who caught him even then was Rhino. Rhino grumbled asking why he’d only just arrived when he’d been waiting for him most, then discovered the gift Bernard had tried hard to hide and was delighted repeatedly, saying he liked it most of all the gifts.
“Am I terrible?”
“That can’t be. That tie pin doesn’t suit such a suit.”
“As expected, the suit is worse than the tie pin you gave me, right?”
When Rhino deliberately frowned and asked, Bernard’s face finally cleared a bit. At last, the wary atmosphere that had been hovering between them softened somewhat. It seemed like the timing to tell the truth. However, Bernard didn’t have the confidence to broach the subject.
“The reason I look like this…… there are circumstances. So just treat me like Elliot for today only. Okay? Please, Rhino.”
Rhino didn’t respond even to his rare request. Bernard bit his lips shut. Was it too unreasonable a request after all? Was there no answer because it was no different from wearing an unsuitable mask?
“If it’s treating you like Elliot. Then something like this would be okay too?”
As soon as a hand suddenly touched his cheek, Rhino pressed his earlobe firmly with his fingernail. Bernard’s shoulders flinched and trembled. When he avoided his gaze, unfamiliar with the suddenly narrowed distance, an ambiguous laugh was heard close by. Rhino looked quite different in atmosphere from usual. He seemed in a bad mood, yet also looked pleased in a way.
“According to you, I like Elliot. Then couldn’t I get closer to you here?”
It was a tone as if reproaching. Bernard grasped the hand covering his cheek. However, Rhino’s hand didn’t easily fall away. Many thoughts popped up inside in the short interval.
“Sorry, I was too spiteful.”
Rhino apologized, then irritably loosened and lowered his necktie and dry-washed his face. Silence seemed to contain more than words. This place at the back of the party venue was dim, unlike the front. There was no one looking, and it was just the two of them in a place no one would need to look for.
“…Rhino. We’re friends, right?”
“……Of course. I’m always on your side.”
Bernard felt like he’d asked a very strange question. Though the smile disappearing from Rhino’s expression was frightening, he couldn’t help it. Because lately, matching Rhino’s constantly fluctuating mood was a difficult task.
But Rhino’s answer somehow sounded like a wrong answer. It seemed like there was a set answer, but to Bernard it was like an abstruse mathematical formula he couldn’t solve. A building’s shadow fell long across Rhino’s face.
“I’ll tell you everything later.”
“As long as you’re not doing something dangerous.”
Rhino’s gripped hand was hot. Bernard wanted to ask if he was nervous, but felt he shouldn’t ask such questions anymore.
“How long are you planning to only stay here?”
There was a voice that suddenly cut between them. At that, Bernard’s expression paled slightly.
“I’m Rubens Hurt.”
“…I’m Rhino McPherson.”
Rubens strongly gripped Bernard’s shoulder. The man’s touch pulling him into his arms was somehow urgent. The blue eyes examining Rhino held a somewhat… wary light. Rubens extended his other hand to request a handshake without releasing the hand embracing Bernard’s shoulder. Though Rhino didn’t hide his displeased mood, he clasped and shook hands moderately.
“I didn’t know you knew Elliot.”
“……We’re very close. It’s been a long time.”
“I didn’t know that since Elliot has never once talked about you, Mr. McPherson.”
Though he was designating him as Elliot, there was no one here who didn’t know he was actually referring to Bernard. Rubens’s smoothly smiling face was a kind of warning. Though Rhino felt wronged, since Bernard had also asked him, he couldn’t easily interfere between them.
“Do you cherish Elliot greatly?”
“He’s a precious existence, so I simply treasure him. Is there some problem?”
Rhino, please.
Rhino glanced at Bernard pleading with his lips, then turned his gaze away. “It’s nothing.” A voice tinged with dissatisfaction concluded, and Rubens smiled satisfiedly and moved his steps while practically embracing Bernard.
“You took long.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m not curious about what you two talked about. However, please don’t let it interfere with the plan.”
Rubens’s voice was somewhat cold. It was a tone reproaching him for being caught by Rhino. Bernard’s lips parted, then closed again. Because it was naturally a given that Rubens had no curiosity about Bernard.
“……I’m sorry. I’ll behave as you wish. Please soften your expression.”
Bernard’s voice was quite frail. It seemed wet too. His voice was always somehow resigned, powerless in front of Rubens. Rubens’s head slowly lowered.
“As I wish?”
“I’ll behave so as not to burden Elliot.”
“How far can you endure?”
“Anything at all.”
Bernard briefly thought that if he stood in as a substitute, might this man perhaps feel déjà vu? But that was truly a futile and shabby dream. It felt like his insides were being slashed. It was right to be faithful to the substitute role and disappear back into reality. Thus, the dream of that night must be buried in his heart forever.
Rubens thoroughly scanned Bernard’s dejected face. His gaze passed Bernard’s shoulder and headed further back. Because Bernard hadn’t turned his head, he seemed not to know, but Rhino was watching them from afar. To Rubens, his figure was clearly visible. Even the tie pin stuck in his loose necktie, distinctly. So then, that tie pin……
“Close your eyes.”
Bernard’s green eyes shook uneasily. Rubens knew that beyond these green lenses, dark green eyes were hidden. A strange impulse and an indescribable faint anger stirred inside. It felt like eating cheap chocolate. A clammy sensation of grease stickily clinging to the roof of his mouth lingered.
Rubens’s action was one step faster than Bernard judging the situation. The touch brushing his ear was affectionate, and the act of kissing near his eyes was also sweet. Bernard felt his breath stop, but Rubens did not. Bernard closed his eyes as if recognizing the action that would follow.
The melody the band was playing happened to be a sweet love song. The sounds of several people around moving seats and conversing subsided. Though pretending otherwise, there were many gazes watching them trapped in their own world. Tomorrow, articles would go up about how passionate a love the two were having.
Bernard’s eyelids trembled shallowly. Rubens found those pitifully closed eyes somehow unpleasant.
