The Boy’s Funeral (1)
“The scent is good…?”
Ruman made a displeased expression. Why is Ruman being annoying! I glared at him.
“Anyway, mind your own business about other people’s tea!”
“Ren.”
When I snapped, Hyung called me shortly.
“I apologize. Ren has a bit of germaphobia.”
‘Germaphobia!’
I was about to shout at Ruman that it wasn’t true, but stopped.
Because I suddenly thought it would be better if they thought that way. Hyung had a somewhat bitter expression for a moment but it quickly disappeared, and Ruman burst out laughing again, as if recalling something on his own.
“I-I’m sorry…”
The physician shrank his body and apologized stammering.
Hearing the apology made me feel very embarrassed. My prickly heart gradually settled down.
He was dragged to the hollow because of us and treated everyone, after all.
Calm down. Anyway, neither the physician nor Kirki the priest nor anyone else can figure it out. If it could be discovered that easily, the pharmacist harabeom would have already succeeded in treating me.
Once my heart calmed down, the physician with a sullen face from having his herbs taken away looked a bit pitiful.
Coco looked at me and waved the herbs in her hand. As if asking what I would do.
“…You can have them.”
“Huh! Really? Is that okay?!”
The physician answered eagerly without declining once. He was almost about to jump up and down. He might have cried if I took back what I just said. Ugh! I really didn’t want to see a grown adult cry. I nodded my head vigorously, and Coco returned the herbs to the physician. He beamed with a broad smile.
“By any chance, where did you get it…”
“……”
“Ah, ah, I’m sorry!”
Hyung stared at me intently. As if asking why I wouldn’t tell him.
“Hey, it’ll be troublesome if you bother the pharmacist harabeom!”
Picking up the excuse I barely came up with, I deliberately grumbled. Actually, it wasn’t wrong either.
Ruman made an “Ah!” sound and nodded his head.
“Th-thank you. I’ll use it well!”
“Then, may I also look at it later?”
The physician belonging to Coco’s family asked, looking back and forth between the man and me.
“Sure!”
“Thank you.”
The physician from Coco’s family also greeted me.
“Is it time?”
Coco glanced out the window briefly.
“Time for what?”
Coco thought for a moment and opened her mouth.
“The funeral. If you’re tired, you don’t have to come.”
Ah… So that’s why everyone was wearing black clothes.
Whose funeral is it? I couldn’t ask, so I just nodded.
A servant Coco called helped me change clothes.
I put on pitch-black clothes and wore pitch-black shoes. The servant draped a thick winter coat over me.
“Princess-nim.”
Soon after, Seton appeared, wearing a black cloak.
He took Coco away and we followed behind. Kirki the priest, who had been full of mischief, also quietly closed his mouth. Ruman was the same. Coco said something to Ruman while glancing back at me intermittently. Quiet words continued but I couldn’t hear the content.
The grass felt somehow damp beneath the thin soles. Is it going to rain?
“Princess-nim.”
Hugh joined us in the castle garden.
He had casts on his wrists and ankles. Gray eyes met mine. He bowed his head briefly.
I should thank him too. But it didn’t seem like the right time, so I just bit my lips for no reason.
Hugh stood behind Coco and followed with a limping gait.
The funeral took place at a solemn temple not far from Ganien Castle.
Throughout the journey, no one said a word. Only the sound of hoofbeats, the rolling of carriage wheels, and the occasional neighing of horses filled the silence.
When we got off the carriage, Coco put on a large-brimmed black hat with black veil. Her face was completely covered, so her expression couldn’t be seen at all. Ruman also checked his attire, then looked over my clothes. I obediently entrusted my body to his hands.
Very few people attended the funeral. As for knights, there were only Seton and three who assisted him. Seton had an indifferent expression, but his subordinate knights had devastated faces. Hugh couldn’t raise his head as if in agony.
The sacred bell rang seven times to announce the funeral.
This reverent sound that rang through the body would guide the soul.
Coco, sitting in the front row, was praying with her hands clasped together. Her hands in black gloves were trembling.
The priest leading the funeral came forward and recited blessings and words honoring the deceased. In the quietness, only the priest’s words flowed with time.
After the short funeral procedure ended, the coffin containing the body was moved to a high hill behind Ganien Castle.
The sky was hazily dark. It was humid weather, as if rain would pour down any moment.
Workers placed the coffin into the deeply dug ground and opened the lid.
One by one, people came forward and threw white flowers along with brief words they couldn’t convey in life.
Coco’s expression was invisible.
At her hand’s trembling, the chrysanthemum petals also trembled. Coco threw the white chrysanthemum she had been gripping tightly into the coffin.
From Coco’s mouth, which seemed to be delaying, a voice finally flowed out.
“…I’m sorry. I hope your soul stays beside God.”
It was a tender voice. Coco seemed to hesitate as if she had more to say, but in the end, she broke into sobs. No matter how much she was a princess of a great family, she was still just a young girl. She quickly hid her crying voice, but the sadness seemed to be conveyed directly.
Finally, the dark clouds began to spit out raindrops. One or two drops at a time. Plop. Pitter-patter. Raindrops that drew long lines across the sky tapped against the bridge of the nose and cheeks.
A maid opened the umbrella she was holding and covered Coco with it.
“Shon…”
A subordinate knight who couldn’t bring himself to throw the white flower in his hand and whose shoulders were shaking finally burst into tears. Another knight came out and threw both his flower and the other’s flower into the coffin together. With distorted faces, they couldn’t finish their last words and stepped aside.
“Shon. I’m proud of you.”
It was Seton who said that. With unhesitating hands, he threw in the flower, and he turned his back without lingering. Because of his large stature and the dark sky, Seton’s face couldn’t be seen. But in the light of the cloudy afternoon sky, it seemed like water droplets sparkled in his eyes.
“Shon. You were a mischievous and very wonderful boy like me. Just for today, I’ll offer a sincere prayer. ‘Etero.'”
Kirki recited a prayer with a sad expression.
It sounded exactly like a funeral dirge.
Before Kirki, who had given the priest’s blessing, stepped back, he playfully added one more thing. “Shon. They say when a person dies, a round white band appears above their head. The round band that will appear above your head will shine much more beautifully than others’!” The maid who had been taking care of Coco hurriedly came out and threw a flower, then choked up and ended up wailing. The mournful crying voice seemed to pierce the heart. The fact that the maid cried so much meant that this person called Shon must have been a very good person.
After all those related to Shon finished their condolences, it was finally the turn of outsiders.
“……”
“……”
The turn of those unrelated to his death.
Hyung and Ruman briefly recited the Hero’s phrase of blessing and withdrew cleanly. The faces of the two who turned around looked somehow frightening and cold. It might have been because of the shadows. Or perhaps they were trying to maintain decorum for the sadness. Because we had neither seen nor heard of this child called ‘Shon,’ who was the younger brother of Seton and Hugh. That might have been the maximum decorum they could maintain.
But why does my heart ache so much?
Thinking it strange, I headed toward the empty spot.
The corpse, cleanly prepared for burial, seemed to be just sleeping.
I might have thought so if not for the deep scar across the face that even makeup couldn’t hide.
Deep gray hair resembling Seton and Hugh. Shon looked like a boy around my age.
It was a strange feeling.
Shon, in particular, resembled Hugh so closely that at a glance they could be mistaken for twins.
But it was strange. Somehow, the more I looked…
I even had the illusion that he and I looked somewhat alike.
“Ren. Don’t stare too deeply.”
Ruman approached and whispered to me. He was frowning.
I carefully placed down the flower.
“Ah…”
The sunlight that had been hidden by dark clouds suddenly revealed itself and pierced my eyes. It was dazzling light.
For a moment, it seemed like something was sparkling even inside the corpse.
When the clouds covered the sky again, there was nothing caught in the dimmed vision. Only the afterimage of rain streaks flickered. I looked at Shon with his hands neatly folded together and opened my mouth.
It was laughable for me, who didn’t know him at all, to say anything.
Yet presumptuously, I had something I wanted to say.
“You seem to have been a really good person. Seeing everyone grieve so deeply… Shon, you’ll surely go to a good place. I hope God’s grace stays by your side.”
I spoke, trying hard to be dignified.
And I became devastated, realizing what that sadness, the sadness I felt, stemmed from.
I too will someday lie in that coffin, not far from now.
The one watching that will be Hyung.
“Surely, God’s grace will also be with the people you loved. Rest easy…”
Go in peace.
I couldn’t say those words because my mouth wouldn’t open. My lips trembled as if convulsing.
If it were me, I think I’d want someone to say that to me.
If God’s grace is with those who remain, wouldn’t it be a bit more comforting? If I could believe that, it seemed like there would be less worry. Ah, I felt like tears would come.
A hot, thick hand grasped my clenched fist.
It was Hyung.
Because it felt like tears would burst if I looked at Hyung, I only bit my innocent lips.
“‘Aras’ pure you, Ren.”
Kirki, with a tear-stained face, called me in a light tone.
