Among the members, Do Yeonjae was the only one who used a handheld mic, focusing more on live quality than making his expressions look cool on camera. Kwon Isoo propped his chin up indifferently and sneered at Do Yeonjae in the video.
“Stupid Do Yeonjae.”
Back then and now, all he knows is singing. The way he acts like nothing matters except singing has been fucking annoying since way back. In the end, he threw away even our promise and went off alone…
“……”
The smile had already disappeared from Kwon Isoo’s face as he watched the video. He stared at Do Yeonjae like that for a long while in his crooked posture. His coldly sunken expression remained motionless, as if frozen in place.
It was the same even after the video ended.
When he didn’t touch anything, the video automatically moved to the next one. This time it was “Waist-Up Live,” a popular content where they handled various unexpected situations while delivering live vocals. A well-edited clip showed Do Yeonjae singing nonchalantly even when a huge snake appeared on set.
Do Yeonjae appeared in the next video too, and the one after that. A video of him winning on a singing competition show, behind-the-scenes of a photoshoot, self-produced content of him gaming with RAYEON members. Kwon Isoo kept watching those videos with an expressionless face. He wasn’t even aware that he was breaking the taboo he’d set for himself for years.
You’re living fucking great, Do Yeonjae.
It’s not like he desperately wished for him to live miserably, but seeing with his own eyes how perfectly Do Yeonjae had blended into the group called RAYEON made him feel dirty for some reason.
Only then did he recall why he’d tried not to look up RAYEON videos for the past few years. Because of this. Because he hated seeing Do Yeonjae doing well without him.
Because this side hadn’t been like that.
[A new hobby. Hmm… Lately I’ve gotten into putting hot sauce on Hawaiian pizza.]
[Ugh, I really can’t respect that.]
When Do Yeonjae revealed his slightly peculiar eating habits on some variety show, the members threw jeers at him. That tastes fucking terrible, and your taste buds… But even while doing that, the RAYEON members’ eyes held affection they couldn’t hide.
Irritation surged up.
Kwon Isoo’s face completely twisted when he checked the video titled “Yeonjae’s 1st Place Acceptance Speech💙.” Do Yeonjae in the video held the acceptance mic with a serious face.
[RayIt, I sincerely thank you. I know how hard RayIt worked for this trophy. This weight… I will never forget it. And thank you to my hyungs too. Meeting my hyungs, I think I’m really happy.]
Happy?
Kwon Isoo sneered sulkily.
“What bullshit.”
What’s he trying to do? The more he thought about it, the more unpleasant it became, so he closed the internet window. After saying the time with me was disgusting, after saying it was just that. He’s happy to have met his RAYEON hyungs?
Fuck. Kwon Isoo picked up his cigarette pack with a cold face.
What a pointless thing to do. Watching dozens of Do Yeonjae videos in the first place was nothing but a waste of time. He should’ve just smoked cigarettes during that time instead.
Halfhearted footsteps headed to the terrace. As soon as he flicked the lighter open, a red flame lit the cigarette. Thick smoke filled his vision hazily before dispersing. In the air that cleared after the smoke disappeared, Do Yeonjae’s face came to mind.
On the day they reunited, Do Yeonjae’s face had been awkwardly stiff the whole time. An expression that didn’t know what to do. After openly showing such uncomfortable signs, does he expect me to believe he’s a fan? Even deception should have limits.
“……”
The corners of Kwon Isoo’s mouth, which had been fiercely glaring at empty air, rose crookedly. He blew smoke sharply toward Do Yeonjae’s face.
Do Yeonjae, who hadn’t contacted him once during all that time. He’d agreed to film the challenge purely to mock that bullshit he’d said on the radio.
Nothing would change just from filming one challenge. And he had even less intention of playing friends with Do Yeonjae now.
But, fuck.
Seeing him avoid me right before my eyes again is just fucking shitty.
A few days later, it was after work. Kwon Isoo’s gaze, standing in front of the company elevator, reached the bathroom entrance. He knew exactly who had gone in there. His eyes grew sharp as he stared intently at one spot.
Anyway, he had a consistent hobby of making people look like idiots.
“Sweet, the elevator’s on the 7th floor. Jackpot.”
Choi Taeon, who had been chattering noisily beside him with talk he had no interest in, asked in a puzzled tone. Hyung? Aren’t you getting on?
He gestured casually, and Taeon pressed the button on his own and went down to the parking lot first.
Left alone, Kwon Isoo walked deliberately and stood at the men’s bathroom entrance. The fierceness in his eyes was greater than the empty laugh hanging on his lips. It’s not like I’m some fucking bug, so why are you hiding,
Do Yeonjae.
Do Yeonjae trying not to run into him. It was a similar pattern to before, so there was nothing new about it. But then why was it pissing him off so much? The feeling of his insides boiling was suffocating, so he roughly pulled off one side of the mask that had been covering his lower face.
No, come to think of it, there was nothing strange about being this pissed off.
The RAYEON challenge he filmed with Do Yeonjae was getting an unprecedented good response. 3.59 million views, 2,938 comments. 310,000 likes. It had only been a few days since it was released and it was already like this.
He helped him that much, but far from thanking him, wasn’t the one avoiding him like a bug clearly in the wrong? So he had plenty of reason to be angry.
Having finished rationalizing, Kwon Isoo confronted Do Yeonjae, who was startled upon discovering him as he was about to exit through the door, with both barrels blazing.
“Why.”
“……”
“Why are you avoiding me?”
But Do Yeonjae unfailingly drew lines and acted infuriatingly. On top of that, he even asked with a disgusted expression:
“Do you smoke?”
That frowning expression.
It was more than enough to properly ruin Kwon Isoo’s mood.
His lips twisted viciously. The reason for acting like that was obvious. It was because of singing, which he was consistently and blindly obsessed with. But fuck, whether Do Yeonjae hates cigarettes or not. Where’s the reason I should care about that?
Kwon Isoo left the spot with rising fury. It wasn’t easy to calm down anger once it had boiled over. Why the fuck does he act like this? Saying he’s a fan. Even if it’s just for courtesy’s sake, shouldn’t he at least pretend to keep the words that came out of his own mouth?
But shameless Do Yeonjae seemed to have no intention of doing that at all. Saying he’s a fan but not even asking for my number.
Number. Of course, even if Do Yeonjae asked, he had no intention of giving it to him, but if you’re a fan, doesn’t that mean you’re interested, and isn’t it natural to want to contact someone?
He really couldn’t understand Do Yeonjae acting differently on the outside and inside. What was even more fucking shitty was that once he looked him up, Do Yeonjae kept appearing in recommended videos. Fucking shitty algorithm. And then now even notifications appeared saying RAYEON’s official account had started a live stream.
That was the RAYEON 1st place celebration live he was watching right now.
[RAYEON got 1st place again today thanks to RayIt!!🎉💖]
What nonsense. At first, it was a mentality of let’s see what fucking bullshit he’ll say this time. The song work was stuck anyway. It was too bothersome to check postponed messages. There was nothing else to do either.
He’d clicked with the intention of closing the window anytime.
[The cake is delicious. I like that it’s not too sweet.]
[Uh… really? Want more?]
[Yes, I want more. Give me all of yours, hyung.]
[Okay, here you go.]
Strangely, he couldn’t take his eyes off Do Yeonjae’s face on the screen.
[I’m joking. Why did you give it without hesitation? Hyung, you eat it.]
But at the same time, he hated looking at it terribly. Do Yeonjae, who stiffened like an idiot in front of him, but smiled pleasantly when he was with his members.
“……”
Kwon Isoo gritted his teeth and headed to the terrace, habitually clutching his cigarette pack.
These were cigarettes he’d been smoking consistently since he started. Soda bubblegum flavor. Even when he tried changing it up once in a while, it was his favorite so he’d end up coming back to it.
But as soon as he lit it and took a drag, a strange feeling surged up. So… the taste of the cigarettes he’d smoked thinking they were good didn’t settle properly on his tongue and felt superficial. The smoke filling his respiratory system seemed astringent and unpleasant. Just to put it in one word.
“…Tastes like fucking shit.”
Fuck, what? Why all of a sudden? It’s not like I’m sick. Muttering with a fierce face, Kwon Isoo eventually threw down the cigarette he’d barely taken a few drags from.
