“Ugh.”
The moment I opened my eyes, what I saw was His Highness’s face with his eyes closed. I was entranced by the beauty that made me lose my words, but only came to my senses after realizing my entire body was aching.
‘What on earth happened?’
I didn’t sit up thinking of His Highness, who rarely seemed to be sleeping soundly, but my head was filled with confusion. When I clutched my head trying to recall what had happened, memories gradually returned one by one. But that couldn’t be considered fortunate.
‘It wasn’t a dream? Are you saying I showed such disgraceful behavior to His Highness because I couldn’t resist my desires?’
Perhaps because I had lived as a beta for so long, I had little fear of heat cycles. I thought I wouldn’t succumb to desire even if a blade was held to my throat, and yet…
‘What on earth did I do?’
The numerous disgraceful acts I had shown before him flashed by like lightning. Most of the memories weren’t clear, but I didn’t particularly want to recall them all. What I remembered now was already overwhelming. My breath became short as if I had run at full speed.
‘Why didn’t His Highness just leave me alone?’
I hadn’t thought he would leave me fallen into debauchery among the alphas, but at least he didn’t need to handle it himself. It would have been over if he had ordered the beta knights to confine me. Unless His Highness was an alpha with shallow patience, but he was someone who didn’t have relations with anyone unless it was his rut, which made it even more puzzling.
The only one who knew the answer would be His Highness. However, I didn’t have the courage to ask directly, and I doubted whether I could digest the answer well.
‘I need to leave here immediately.’
I was scared just at the thought of having to face His Highness and talk. It wouldn’t be strange if he thought I had intentionally not taken medicine and approached him—it was that kind of situation.
‘I need to prepare myself mentally. I’ll show my face when I can accept whatever His Highness says.’
I had no capacity to maintain reason. Right now, I only had the impulse to escape from His Highness’s side and run away. Thinking of His Highness, whose senses were sharp even while sleeping, I carefully slipped out from under the blanket. As I extended one leg outside the wide bed, I felt countless gazes. The knights and attendants who had been quietly standing guard while pretending not to be there sent their gazes to me.
‘Right. I was being monitored.’
A sense of defeat covered my entire body. I had briefly forgotten due to the shock of the heat cycle, but I wasn’t in a position to freely escape from His Highness’s sight. With nowhere to retreat and nowhere to advance, my body froze stiffly.
‘Should I ask to be sent to my quarters even if they put surveillance on me? If that’s hard to trust, could I ask to be locked in prison?’
Being tortured in prison seemed like it would actually be more comfortable for my mind. Even knowing the knights, whose top priority was His Highness’s orders, wouldn’t listen to me, I moved my stiffly frozen legs. I decided to believe in the near-miraculous possibility of one in ten thousand.
I was about to rise from the bed, killing my sound like an assassin. Suddenly something grabbed my waist and pulled me, making me topple right back onto the bed. By position, there was only one person who could do such a thing.
“Your, Your Highness.”
His Highness’s unrestrained pheromones naturally made me relax. My mind was saying I needed to escape this situation quickly, but the unfamiliar omega body did the opposite.
“You slept for three full days without eating, so it’ll be hard to get up.”
“Th-three days?”
“They brought quite a potent medicine. Otherwise, there was a high possibility you would have regained consciousness even though your heat cycle hadn’t ended.”
His Highness spoke in a gentle tone as if singing a song while pulling me in.
“Then, then why are you here, Your Highness?”
“It’s rare, but they say there are omegas who have adverse reactions to the medicine. I had to watch to see if there were any abnormalities.”
So my question was why His Highness had to do that himself. But if I said this, things I’d need to ask would follow in a stream. I decided to do what I needed to do first.
“I have committed a discourtesy. I am deeply sorry for showing you such an ugly sight. If you command it, I will comply even if you order me to take suppressants every day. No, I will gladly accept it even if you strip me of my guard knight position.”
My whole body still ached, but I knelt on one knee and bowed my head deeply. It wasn’t an appropriate posture to do on a bed, but I felt I had to prostrate myself.
“It’s quite a talent to only say you’ll do things I don’t want you to do, Sir Aila.”
At some point, His Highness’s voice, which had always seemed like he was admonishing a child, sank low. Even without knowing the reason, he had certainly become displeased.
“Do you know what the side effects are when omegas take suppressants without keeping to the proper intervals?”
Instead of answering what I was really curious about, His Highness asked a question. At a question I had only heard when receiving sex education as a very young child, I gaped my mouth for a moment.
“You said you’d take them without knowing?”
“I’m sorry. The side effects are infertility, pheromone abnormalities, and over time, suppressants no longer working.”
“Not only that, there were also cases of death from drug abuse.”
His Highness’s eyes as he uttered the word ‘death’ were deeply sunken. Fear as if confronting a vast abyss and an ominous anger like looking at a creature that had committed original sin flowed out. It was conveyed through pheromones too, making me tremble without knowing it. It felt like thousands of blades were pointed at me.
“I didn’t know that far.”
It was words I uttered without going through thought. Unexpectedly, perhaps that was the right answer, as the heavy atmosphere lifted somewhat.
“You should.”
His Highness took a deep breath large enough to inflate his chest, then succeeded in creating his original gentle smile right away. The sharp pheromones remained as they were, but they were gradually subsiding.
“Since I learned your cycle this time, I’ve had the imperial palace pharmacist prepare medicine suited to your body. Make sure to take it for exactly 5 days a month.”
That was something I should handle myself, not the imperial palace pharmacist. However, I could instinctively feel I shouldn’t say that. Even if I was told I was tactless, I understood context.
“I will do so.”
As someone who didn’t know much about omega suppressants, this was actually better for me.
“And you are still my guard knight. Return to duty starting tomorrow.”
“But after causing such an incident, how can I…”
“Was it something you deliberately aimed for?”
“That’s not it. That much I can swear to.”
Only after uttering those words did the thought pass through my mind that saying ‘I aimed for it’ would have been more like Aila’s behavior and also more advantageous for being stripped of the guard knight position. I had reflexively told the truth because I didn’t want to be despised by His Highness.
“I thought so. You forgot about your heat cycle because you were lying in a sickbed from burns, right?”
His Highness was very cunningly creating excuses for me. Since it was even a valid reason, I had to silently answer, “That’s right.”
“Yes. You lost consciousness again not long after rising from your sickbed, so your body must be weak. Let’s eat.”
I was still not free from confusion, yet His Highness calmly brought up food. As if that was more important.
“Although it was a mistake, after committing such a crime against Your Highness, I cannot shamelessly remain by your side…”
“Crime?”
His Highness muttered as if he truly didn’t understand.
“So what harm did I suffer?”
“Pardon?”
“Sleeping with you doesn’t harm me personally. Rather, you should worry about yourself.”
His Highness, who paused for a moment, slightly frowned as if it was somewhat troublesome.
“Because even walls have ears in the imperial palace.”
In other words, rumors about me and His Highness would have spread throughout the imperial palace. However, if that was the case, I was thinking it would be all the more proper to dismiss me.
“You asked for Tiel’s body to be buried in the ground, right?”
A subject that seemed completely unrelated came up.
“Since he left my bedroom, I haven’t been able to sleep even a single wink. It’s gotten worse than before.”
“But earlier, Your Highness…”
“Right. Only when I’m beside Sir Aila is the exception.”
A shock came as if I had been struck hard on the head.
“So shouldn’t you take responsibility?”
A gentle hand stroked my cheek. That action was incomparably affectionate, yet strangely goosebumps rose on my spine.
“From now on, you will always be by my side regardless of shift changes. You’ll open your eyes when I open mine, and close your eyes together when I close mine.”
It felt as if I had been caught in an enormous trap.
