But there were so many people here and one of them was even a minor. He had to endure. Jang Juwon felt the need to turn his thoughts elsewhere. He desperately needed a different topic.
“Sunbae, uh, I mean sunbae……”
Just then, his dark skin tone caught his eye. Baek Huiseon and his older brother whom he’d seen in front of the house had snow-white skin unlike Baek Iseon. That was what had made it difficult for Jang Juwon to distinguish between his siblings.
“Is that a tan?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“It’s Baek Huiseon’s work.”
“The artist’s?”
“Yeah. She said there are too many pale guys or something like that… I just did it because she told me to.”
“The hair color too?”
“Yeah.”
“……”
He wanted to applaud Baek Huiseon’s eye. It actually suited him incredibly well. On the other hand, he thought it would have suited him well even with white skin and black hair. He wanted to see that once. Jang Juwon tried to overlay his original appearance in his mind. He was concentrating so hard that a wrinkle formed between his eyebrows.
When Jang Juwon forgot to respond while letting his imagination run wild, Baek Iseon felt a little anxious. His expression didn’t look very good either.
“Does it… look weird?”
He’d never wanted an evaluation from anyone. But right now he desperately did.
“No, no. It suits you well. It’s just that……”
“……”
Baek Iseon swallowed his dry saliva.
“I thought you did it because you wanted to.”
“……Me, because I wanted to?”
Baek Iseon thought those words were strange. There was no way he would do such a bothersome thing because he wanted to. He only did it because it was work.
“Do you maybe… not like it?”
As Baek Iseon trailed off, Jang Juwon, who had been checking his complexion, asked carefully. He recalled what he’d said before. That it wasn’t work he did because he wanted to.
“What?”
“Being a model.”
“Well, I’m not sure. Anyway, I started with the promise that I’d only do it until graduation.”
“Uh, you won’t do it anymore after you graduate?”
“Why do you think I manage my grades?”
“Ah……”
Jang Juwon thought it was a bit of a shame. It suited him well. He wanted to see more. If possible, someday with his own hands… he wanted to try shooting too. Jang Juwon swallowed his disappointment, trying not to show it.
“If you don’t like it, there’s nothing to be done.”
Baek Iseon turned his body to lie down looking at the ceiling. Thanks to that, the hand that had been stroking Jang Juwon’s arm fell away.
“It’s not that I don’t like it.”
Baek Iseon muttered as if talking to himself.
“What kind of talk is that?”
“Working with noona is fun.”
“……”
“But sometimes it’s lonely.”
An unexpected answer popped out. He’d been thinking of ordinary answers like it being bothersome or not fun, or not fitting his aptitude, but the word “lonely” was unexpected. From his eyes quietly gazing at the ceiling, he could clearly see whatever emotion he must be feeling.
“Sometimes I feel like I’m trapped. Inside the world of the person called Baek Huiseon.”
Jang Juwon silently listened to his story. Ambiguous words continued that he couldn’t tell if they were meant for Jang Juwon or for himself.
“The world inside the lens that noona looks at is very small and lonely. When that gaze is overlaid on me, I sometimes feel like I’m alone.”
“……”
“And Baek Huiseon wants to capture that emotion of mine in her photos. So… she knows that I’m someone who understands her world very well.”
He had no idea he had such thoughts. Fragments of Baek Huiseon’s interview that he’d read before floated up in Jang Juwon’s mind. Her words about trapping solitude in photographs were affecting him too.
He wanted to comfort him. At the same time, he felt a selfish heart. Baek Iseon had talked about himself for the first time. That made him happy.
“But this summer was okay. Because you were with me.”
“Me?”
“Yeah. You only looked at me the entire time you were working.”
“Don’t get the wrong idea. I was only staring because your serious look was so out of character that it was fascinating.”
Despite the prickly answer, Baek Iseon smiled gently and sat up.
“Thank you for looking at me, not the lens.”
Baek Iseon pulled Jang Juwon’s hand toward him. He lightly pressed his lips to the back of his hand.
“Thank you for letting me be by your side.”
“……”
His plain words made Jang Juwon’s heart flutter. If his existence had been helpful, he wanted to offer comfort this time too. Jang Juwon leaned his body slightly and kissed his cheek. Baek Iseon’s eyes widened. He thought that look was quite cute. He must have definitely gone crazy.
“If you have those thoughts again……”
The two faces drew closer and closer.
“I’ll let you think about me.”
Their lips slowly parted. The two faces came within close range. Their noses grazed and their breaths mingled together.
Click.
“Ah, refreshing!”
“Aaak!”
The bathroom door burst open, spewing out steamy moisture. Choi Yeonho walked into the room with a refreshed face, smiling brightly.
“Sunbae, what are you doing like that?”
Choi Yeonho looked with a puzzled face at Baek Iseon who had his body positioned between the bed and the floor. It was truly a bizarre posture. It almost looked like he’d been pushed by someone and fallen to the floor.
“……Stretching.”
That’s what he said, but the look in his eyes as he stared at him was murderous. What kind of stretching made someone glare at another person as if ready to kill them? Choi Yeonho gulped down his saliva once. He really was a scary person.
* * *
After eating the dinner the couple had prepared, the four people sat around the wooden platform in the yard. It was Shin Jisu’s idea. On a day like this, you absolutely have to drink cold soju outside or something like that. Peaches were chosen as the snacks. Jang Juwon selected a few brightly ripened peaches from among the ones he’d picked himself and placed them on the platform. After downing soju in one gulp and putting sweet peach in his mouth, they indeed went well together. The fruit juice lingering on the tip of his tongue made everyone’s mood much better.
Jang Juwon, who had brought the soju glass to his lips, tilted his head back. The night sky without the city lights was refreshing. The sound of Choi Yeonho and Shin Jisu chattering and Baek Iseon’s small laughter mixed together with the sound of insects, filling the space.
Suddenly he thought he was happy. He wished this precious moment of being able to talk peacefully without any worries would last forever. And he also knew a way to preserve it forever.
“Wait a minute!”
Suddenly Jang Juwon jumped up and rushed into the house.
“I’m going to the bathroom too.”
Choi Yeonho also wobbled after Jang Juwon into the house. After the two disappeared and only two remained, a chilly coolness briefly hovered over the platform.
“I really fucking hate saying this, but it’s thanks to you, sunbae.”
Shin Jisu, who had gulped down soju, said with a slight grimace at the bitter taste.
“Don’t do things that don’t suit you. It’s making me want to puke.”
Baek Iseon handed her a piece of peach. Because he hoped she would put this peach in her mouth and shut up.
“I’m really going to do well.”
Shin Jisu, who instantly chewed and swallowed the peach, quickly continued speaking. Baek Iseon felt a bit annoyed as his efforts went down the drain.
“Can you stop there? I really don’t want to know.”
“Even if you don’t want to know, you’ll find out, right? Because I’m going to become your maesu in the future.”
“What, maesu? Hey, you, enough……!”
“Jang Juwon! Go slowly, you’ll fall!”
At the suddenly heard voice, Baek Iseon cut off his words and turned his head toward where the sound came from. Jang Juwon was coming down the stairs with quick steps, holding a camera in his arms. Baek Iseon stood up from his seat without realizing it.
It was as if he was running toward him. So the impulse to embrace him in his arms right now came on strongly. Baek Iseon spread both arms.
