Until they arrived at his house, Jaehwi showed no reaction at all, as if he would never speak to him or even meet his eyes again. His gaze was fixed ahead, and he didn’t answer no matter what was said.
Raon couldn’t bring himself to say he loved him, but he did say he liked him—yet Jaehwi didn’t budge. Even when Raon touched his hands gripping the steering wheel, touched the side of his face, and stroked his hair, Jaehwi acted as if he felt nothing, as if he heard nothing.
After parking the car in front of his house, Jaehwi turned off the engine and immediately got out of the car. Then he picked up Bbobbo and the golem, who had been holding their breath in the back seat, in both hands, and without even asking permission, slipped right into his house. He even committed the outrage of not even thinking to open the firmly closed gate and simply climbing over the wall.
The moment Raon hurriedly opened the gate and followed him inside, what he saw was Bbobbo tightly hugging the golem with his front paws as if it were some precious doll, crossing the garden toward the house. In contrast, Jaehwi was walking toward the inner part of the garden, stepping on the garden stones.
After the live-in caretaker came out from the house and Raon confirmed that Bbobbo had safely entered the house, he still stood there in the same spot. Jaehwi, who had been striding along with his long legs, had already turned the corner and gone deep into the garden, out of sight.
“Please prepare a meal and bring it to the garden.”
Having spoken to the caretaker who was still standing at the entrance even though Bbobbo and the golem had gone inside, Raon walked with slow steps along the path Jaehwi had taken.
Unlike Jaehwi, who had walked while leaping over two or three garden stones at a time, Raon’s feet touched every single garden stone.
Unlike Jaehwi, who stood firm like an ancient tree that had endured in the same spot for thousands of years, he himself was like a stream in the forest. Not a vast river with a wide span flowing as if penetrating through mountains, but an insignificant little stream that would dry up or have its course suddenly change with just a slight change in weather.
Swayed by emotions, swayed by circumstances. Jaehwi had been calmly accepting him as he was.
Lost in thought, Raon turned the corner and couldn’t readily take a step forward. Jaehwi, sitting in a chair in front of the table in the most beautiful spot in the garden, was staring at one place with his chin propped up. The garden where the sun had already set was filled with darkness, but the landscape lighting placed here and there illuminated the path leading to him.
Raon’s footsteps were added to the space filled with the sounds of unnamed insects and the rustling sound created when the wind brushing through his hair met the leaves. With each step his feet moved, the distance between him and Jaehwi grew closer.
What had looked like a large black mass from afar gradually became clearer. Sitting in front of Jaehwi who maintained his silence, Raon looked at the spot where his gaze was fixed. To confirm whether what he was seeing was correct, he looked at Jaehwi’s eyes and then looked again at the spot he was staring at, but Raon couldn’t see anything.
The place he was looking at was not only away from the landscape lighting but also near the roots of low shrubs. While they both looked at the place that appeared pitch black, appetizing food was placed on the table between them.
Even until the employees finished setting up the meal and disappeared, there was no change between the two.
“If the food gets cold, it won’t taste good. Let’s eat first. After we eat, just like you listened to my entire story, I’ll listen to everything you want to say too.”
Once again, it was Raon who broke the silence. On behalf of Jaehwi who didn’t immediately respond or move, he picked up his spoon first. As he drank the warm soup with steam rising from it, it felt like his body, which had been tense since the chaotic moment, was gently relaxing.
Many things had happened in the dungeon they had entered lightheartedly. And it hadn’t even been three hours since they left that dungeon. His body, which had rolled on the ground from the dungeon’s trembling and rolled on the floor due to the force created by Jaehwi’s ability, was only now starting to cry out that it was hurting. His wrist that had been grabbed by Seowoo seemed to hurt too, and in any case, it was clear that fatigue and lethargy were rushing in all at once as the tension released.
He could have been crushed under the feet of the giant golem or killed by randomly falling by-products. After leaving the dungeon, he had roughly brushed off his messy body and handed all the protective gear to Hyukjin, but Raon was still wearing the clothes he had worn in the dungeon.
Jaehwi sitting across from him had also only brushed off the dust and removed his protective gear, and like himself, was a complete mess. Yet this place was endlessly peaceful. Due to the stark difference between a few hours ago and now, the near-death experience felt like a dream. While Jaehwi had been driven to the brink of death in the dungeon, he himself had been living enjoying this peace and happiness.
The one who created this comfort…
He put his spoon back in the soup bowl and scooped up soup, but his hand wouldn’t readily move. Even while Raon hesitantly drank the soup one spoonful at a time, Jaehwi was still looking elsewhere.
Unable to urge him to hurry up and eat, just as Raon was about to choose to put down the spoon he had used to scoop soup back in the soup bowl instead of lifting it, he watched Jaehwi slowly pick up his spoon.
“Stop looking at my face and eat. I won’t say anything until you finish eating all the soup, rice, and side dishes in front of you.”
Watching Jaehwi, who didn’t even give him a glance and started eating with the soup, then moved on to the rice, Raon picked up his spoon again. There’s too much to finish eating… While Raon barely ate half, Jaehwi cleanly emptied the food placed in front of him.
Having eaten enough, just as Raon was about to put down his spoon, at Jaehwi’s “Ahem,” he brought his spoon to the rice bowl.
“Don’t just eat rice and soup, eat the side dishes too.”
If I eat all of that, I’ll burst and die. Does it make sense objectively for you and me to eat the same amount of food? Recalling the caretaker who had brought an excessively large amount of food for two people—whatever they were thinking—Raon ground his teeth inwardly.
Even though he couldn’t finish all the side dishes and was aiming just for the soup and rice, Raon ended up rolling his eyes at the piece of meat that came up on top of the spoon that scooped rice.
You told me not to look at your face so I was forcing myself not to look… The corners of the mouth of the guy who just moments ago had been staring holes into the dark ground with an emotionless face were slightly raised. Jaehwi was a person even more unpredictable than himself, whose moods changed as quickly as boiling porridge.
While he silently glared, at the outrage of trying to bring and add another side dish, Raon quickly shoved the spoon into his mouth. Then the water glass slid toward him. What’s with being nice to me now, after telling me not to look at you or talk to you?
Having gulped down the water in the glass, Raon put the empty glass down on the table with a sound.
“Don’t be angry. Eat a little more.”
Just as he was about to say something, because Jaehwi spoke first and he missed the timing to speak, Raon once again had a spoon in his hand.
“Should I put something else on instead of meat? Come to think of it, I don’t even know what hyung likes.”
As soon as he handed him the spoon, Jaehwi’s hand holding the chopsticks had stopped. Then he pointed to one dish while looking at his eyes. When he didn’t give in to Jaehwi and didn’t even blink, his chopsticks stealthily moved toward another dish.
When he showed no reaction, Jaehwi’s chopsticks wandered over the dishes, and during the prolonged time of just looking at each other’s eyes, it was Raon who burst out laughing first.
I can’t hate you even if I try to.
In the battle of wills where only their gazes exchanged, it was a natural progression for Raon to burst out laughing. It was because he could read the emotions of “Should I give you this? Should I give you that? What exactly? What do you like?” directly. And this appearance reminded him of the cute Jaehwi from before the regression.
Like a loyal puppy that only looked at him, perhaps? What he hadn’t known then, he knew now. While looking at the cold and calm Jaehwi, even though it was the same Jaehwi, he had even missed the old Jaehwi. Though it was truly unfair to the current Jaehwi.
But regardless of his personality, Jaehwi was Jaehwi. He had tried to accept him as he was, but seeing that old appearance of his, how could he not crumble? Moreover, as time went on, Jaehwi even started to slyly take away his energy.
It was as if he was whispering, “Even like this? I’m even receiving the guiding you always want to give, hyung. Are you going to keep being like this?”
“I’m full.”
After laughing out loud for a while, Raon leaned back comfortably in his chair and said while barely suppressing his laughter.
“Eat more.”
“Humanly speaking, it doesn’t make sense for you and me to eat the exact same amount. I’ve eaten enough. Now say what you want to say. You’re ready to talk now.”
When he leaned back completely, as if he had no intention of insisting further, Jaehwi also put down the chopsticks he was holding.
“I don’t have any intention of dying either. Even if I die, I’ll die alone—I have even less intention of dying together with hyung.”
“Hey. Who said anything about dy—”
“The movie I watched with hyung was fun. Let’s watch it again. I’ve never worn anything other than black clothes, so you’ll take care of that for me, right? Let’s go see the aurora together too.”
At Jaehwi’s words that cut off his own words and continued, Raon released the strength from his upper body that he had straightened in excitement and leaned back comfortably in his chair again.
