Chapter 105
I came to loathe the mana of Yu Dohyun flowing through my body. While a few unsolved mysteries remained, I felt like the outlines of the most important things had been revealed. I ran to the bathroom and began to vomit. I was so disgusted by that expressionless face that casually used a child as a shield and killed them, then wiped away the splattered blood as he killed Han Jaemin’s parents. I was terrified that if this was the result of humanity being worn away through endless regressions, I might become like that too. So I kept retching even though nothing was coming out.
“Chanhee!”
Yu Hyunjae, who had returned home right on time, rushed to me. I slowly looked up at him with a pale face. The face of Hyunjae now, his dying father’s face, and the young Hyunjae’s face as he was kicked by Yu Dohyun all overlapped.
“What should I do, Hyunjae?”
“What’s wrong? What happened? Did something go wrong?”
“…”
“What can I do?”
Hyunjae embraced me. I swayed weakly in his arms.
“What should I do to make you even a little more comfortable?”
After a long silence, I quietly said:
“Just hold me.”
I muttered while looking at the changed System Window visible over Hyunjae’s shoulder.
“I’ll hold you, even if it’s just for now.”
[92% toward goal, 8% remaining until achievement.]
Truth is death, and death will make the truth meaningless. I closed my eyes. Then slowly opened them again. My misfortune was not mine, and it had to be returned to its original owner. Therefore, I would not die. I had no unfulfilled life goals, after all.
*
“Looks like the deal went well.”
“There’s nothing for the Director to lose. That’s how he judged it too.”
“This will be valuable research material. It might even be unique in the entire world.”
“That may be true, but I’m not a mad scientist who wants to know these things at the cost of Chanhee’s life. Before being a researcher, I’m just an ordinary person.”
“Even if you’re an ordinary person, Han Jaemin isn’t, right?”
“I only do what I’m told to do, nothing more.”
“Yes. That’s actually reassuring.”
“The medical staff—well, it’s awkward to call them that since they’re not real doctors—will be entering the country tomorrow. They’re from the Philippines, just so you know.”
“So will the surgery be tomorrow?”
“I knew it, but you’re really impatient.”
“Whatever.”
“It will likely be sometime next week. They said they need sufficient time. Even though they’ve extracted scrap mana in factory-like settings before, extracting this amount of high-quality mana in bulk is a first for them too.”
“That’s great.”
“Excuse me?”
“I can see the Eden South encore concert before the surgery.”
Dr. Jeon looked at me incredulously.
“Is that how twenty-year-olds are?”
“You were twenty once too, weren’t you?”
“That was so long ago I can’t even remember, and I never had such reckless thoughts.”
“Yes, I’m sure you didn’t.”
I lay back down on the bed and picked up my phone.
“Want to listen to Eden South?”
“…Music appreciation isn’t really my thing.”
“I used to hate listening to songs too. But they really clear your mind.”
As soon as I played the music on the app, loud electric guitar sounds filled the room. One of the researchers standing behind me looked at me in surprise.
“Good, right?”
“It’s just noisy.”
“Everyone says that at first.”
“Ah, is that so?”
“I even have a CD with the members’ handwritten signatures that they gave me. Want to see it? It was before I was exposed as a fake Ranker, so they wrote me a really heartfelt letter. Well, I’ll be a real fake Ranker soon anyway.”
“You talk a lot. I thought you’d be quite nervous.”
“Maybe it’s because I’m twenty. It doesn’t really feel real.”
“I suppose that could be it.”
What could be it? I pouted and turned off the music. The last measured mana value was very stable. In other words, my mana and Yu Dohyun’s were gradually fusing naturally. Dr. Jeon repeatedly ran the tests again in disbelief. After all this time trying to make them fuse with no success, now that they were trying to extract it, the fusion process irritated him.
“Young bodies are unpredictable.”
“You’re talking as if you’re really old.”
“Well, there’s more than ten years between us, so it’s not an insignificant age gap.”
“Yes. You look even older than that, but anyway, old people are unpredictable too.”
“Once you finish your IV, you can go home. The Director himself will inform you about the surgery schedule today.”
“I see. So I’ll see you then?”
“Probably.”
“Let’s meet before that.”
“…Why?”
“I’ll take you to see the Eden South concert.”
“Ah, no thanks.”
As soon as Dr. Jeon left with an exhausted expression, I picked up my phone to check my messages. One from Go Hankyul, four from Yu Hyunjae. After our not-quite-argument, Hyunjae had been scarce for a few days, but then suddenly started practically living at my house. I guessed it was because he was shocked after seeing me vomiting, but it seemed there was something more.
*
“Next week?”
“Yeah, why?”
As soon as he heard the surgery was scheduled for next week, Hyunjae’s expression soured. I thought he was clearly planning something, but I was going to wait until he told me himself.
“Can’t we postpone it a bit more?”
“Why? What’s the reason?”
Hyunjae hesitated and rolled his eyes. I thought his flustered face, which I hadn’t seen in a while, was quite cute.
“If it’s the Eden South encore performance, I’ve already got tickets.”
“No, it’s not that…”
“Then what is it?”
“…There’s someone I want you to meet.”
My eyes widened at the unexpected words from Hyunjae’s mouth. I was surprised that there was someone in Hyunjae’s network “worth introducing” to me.
“Who?”
“They’re not here yet.”
“Then where are they?”
“England.”
“Don’t tell me… someone you met at school?”
“Yes.”
“What? What kind of person?”
“I told you. There was only one reason I went to study abroad.”
I looked at Hyunjae with my smile fading as the atmosphere became increasingly strange. Yes, he had said the reason for his studying abroad was because of me. That was when I had received a terminal diagnosis due to mana. So did that mean he had found someone who could solve the current situation? I pressed Hyunjae to confirm my guess.
“A mana researcher? Better than Jeon Jeongwoo?”
“They’re a researcher, but not that field.”
“What do you mean not that field?”
“I mean, unlike that previous researcher, they’re not a mana specialist.”
“Then what?”
“Necromancy.”
“What?”
“Someone who’s been researching necromancy for a long time.”
What came from Hyunjae’s mouth was one surprise after another, making my head spin. So there was someone else besides me who had performed necromancy? I’m pretty sure back then, they said I was the first master when I used necromancy.
“They’re also the author of the book you saw.”
“What have you been doing over there?”
I finally dropped the glass I was holding when he mentioned the book’s author. I couldn’t believe he’d been doing this while even graduating early.
“They said they’re coming here next week.”
“Because of me?”
“Yes. I explained your situation, and the day before yesterday, they said they might have found a solution…”
“And you’re only telling me now?”
“Well, your condition hasn’t been good lately.”
“You have a talent for surprises.”
Hyunjae lowered his eyelashes and took my hand at my joking remark.
“I’m really scared, Chanhee.”
“…Why suddenly?”
“You keep acting like nothing’s wrong as the surgery date approaches.”
“…”
“Every day is like a nightmare for me.”
It seemed that pretending to be fine had become such a habit that it came across that way. I moistened my dry lips and comforted Hyunjae.
“I told you. I won’t die.”
“Yes. You’ll open your eyes somewhere again.”
“…”
“But I’ll be abandoned by you as many times as you die.”
“Abandoned…”
“And yet, are you really not affected at all?”
Tears welled up in Hyunjae’s eyes. He seemed to have been struggling with this thought for quite some time. He might have thought he shouldn’t show his pain because I would have it the hardest. I tightly embraced Hyunjae’s large frame.
“Of course it affects me.”
“Then why…”
“I really want to live.”
“Chanhee.”
“That’s why I’m trying everything.”
Otherwise, I too would have thrown away all my humanity and tried to survive alone, only to end up dying without ever coming close to true happiness. What I gained from Yu Dohyun’s scenario wasn’t just information. He was a cautionary example to me. I wiped Hyunjae’s tears and gave his cheek a light kiss.
“Don’t cry. Let’s enjoy our time together.”
“Okay.”
“We’ll cook together, eat together, ride bikes, go to concerts.”
“Okay.”
“We’ll spend time like that. And I’ll talk with the person you’re bringing.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll make sure we can be happy, no matter what direction we take.”
“I will too.”
“Yes. You said I was your first priority.”
Instead of answering, Hyunjae pressed his lips to mine. I tried to pull away but was pulled close by his firm hand on my waist. The taste of salt invaded my mouth briefly before disappearing.
